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Spencer Pratt is out of control. We've known this for some time at THG, but now it has gotten to the point where even his friends and family see he is losing it.

Last night's episode of The Hills, "This is Goodbye," focused on Heidi's husband's deteriorating mental health, as well as Brody and Kristin's renewed romance.

Here's The Hollywood Gossip's official Hills rundown, plus-minus style:

Holly and Stephanie lament being the only sane ones left in their families. Never mind that both of them have serious, well-publicized drinking issues. Plus 9.

After Holly rehashes how Spencer called the cops on Heidi's mom, Steph says Speidi has no friends. Charlie is rolling in his grave as we speak. Minus 4.

Heidi and Kristin are friends? Were they always? Hard to keep track. Plus 3.

Spencer looks like he needs a hug.

"Who am I without Spencer?" Heidi ponders. Hmm. Probably a reasonably cute, harmless, not brainwashed chick with friends and real-looking breasts. Minus 37.

Audrina Patridge visits her boyfriend Ryan Cabrera at the studio. He's apparently still under contract? Minus 2. But Plus 8 for his decision to skip that night's drama.

Venturing out of his hole for once, Spencer calls Audrina the "lamest girl in the club" which sparks an argument between himself and Brody. Like old times. Plus 5.

Heidi Montag has a threefold excuse for Spencer: 1. He has stuff on his mind (Minus 3). 2. All guys are controlling (Minus 6). 3. She changed herself (Minus 12).

Most awkward clubbing moments ever: Heidi Montag shows her crystals collection to Kristin as Spencer says Heidi doesn't watch TV or use the computer. Plus 20.

OMG, Brody and Kristin are, like, so meant to be ... but single!

Holly and Stephanie say they are done with Heidi and Spencer, while Kristin Cavallari and Brody Jenner get down on the floor and eventually leave together. Plus 9.

The next day, Kristin says what they have going is good, whatever it is. Brody says he likes being single, and Kristin does too. Holla at friends with benefits! Plus 18.

Obligatory Lo scene! Steph says that she is flipping between being angry and sad over Heidi and Spencer. Blah, blah, blah. Stephanie and Lo are so boring. Minus 7.

The girls all are told by MTV agree to completely cut off Mr. and Mrs. Spencer Pratt. No communication at all. Plus 5 for effort, but we give it about half an episode.

TOTAL: +4. SEASON: +55. Basically, it was an episode in which everyone agrees Speidi is insane, and Brody macked on Kristin. Boilerplate stuff, but we'll take it.

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Kristin Cavallari recently denied a batch of drug rumors surrounding her hard partying, but didn't say anything about booze. Probably for good reason.

The star got into an early morning, alcohol fueled screaming match with a gorgeous brunette who was flirting with her ex, Brody Jenner, Wednesday.

At the Nylon Young Hollywood party at the Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood, Kristin Cavallari first spotted Brody hitting on Hills co-star Audrina Patridge.

She didn't seem interested, as she's dating Ryan Cabrera.

Jenner stopped speaking to Patridge to try to calm down Cavallari, who was on her second beer, but she grabbed his arm angrily before they parted.

At midnight, Cavallari stood up quickly with her dress hiked to her waist - flashing a pair of white mesh panties - and didn't seem all that concerned.

Luckily, MTV's cameras caught much or all of this.

However, a few minutes later, a gorgeous brunette began chatting up Jenner, making Cavallari - who gave the girl an icy hello - increasingly pissed.

Cavallari, who had been drinking all night, went all Naomi Campbell and threw a phone she received for free from a suite down on the floor in anger.

After about 30 minutes of Jenner's flirtation, Cavallari approached her and began screaming. The brunette's friends began yelling back at Cavallari.

A Hills producer was overheard whispering, "This is going to get ugly."

Brody Jenner intervened after about five minutes of fighting, pulling Cavallari away and giving her a hug. That's when he apparently closed the deal.

Cavallari smiled and flashed Jenner a hotel room key and the two of them - with their arms all over each other - took off together. Awwww yeeeah.

Here's hoping these two get back together ... we could use more stories like this on a daily basis, and Kristin's a bit less insane than Jayde Nicole.

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The Hills stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, featured prominently on the show since 2006, may be leaving it before the series finale later this summer.

Neither has taped an episode since mid-April.

A big reason for that? Spencer Pratt was suspended from the show after threatening to kill a producer... never endears you to the production department.

Rumors also suggest Heidi Montag's "role was reduced" after she objected to a faux-divorce story line. They wanted her to fake divorce Spencer? Shocker!

Show creator Adam DiVello, who Montag recently accused of sexual harassment, "doesn't think Heidi and Spencer will come back for the series finale."

We suppose this isn't too shocking, or sad. If this week's The Hills was any indication, their behavior is growing increasingly erratic and out of control.

Flying the Coop

HAPPY TRAILS: Are the increasingly erratic Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt ready to fly the coop before The Hills even ends? [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

Moreover, Heidi Montag wasn't invited to a secret May 6 powwow DiVello had with the female cast in Santa Monica, Calif., to "brainstorm the series finale."

NOTE: That's right, the producers "brainstorm" episodes. Of a reality show. Can it get any more ridiculous than that? They don't even pretend anymore.

"All the girls were asked to come up with ideas of how the show ends," an insider tells Us. Among the ideas: a trip to Costa Rica for the 100th episode.

Another idea? A future Sex and the City–style movie sequel.

"He wants The Hills to end on an upbeat tone," a source tells Us Weekly of DiVello's plan. "He wants to prove to the audience that the girls are going on to bigger and better things and that the show was good for them."

In the case of one cast member, it was pretty terrible for her. We think anyone who's seen the Heidi Montag plastic surgery pictures will agree with us.

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The third episode of The Hills' final season reintroduced Brody Jenner and Kristin Cavallari as lovebirds. Because ... they used to date and we're out of other options?

Last night's episode, "Elephant in the Room," found these two pondering a staged reconnection, while he also pondered his supposed "crush" on Audrina Patridge.

Meanwhile, Spencer Pratt absolutely went off the rails at Holly Montag. Below, The Hollywood Gossip breaks down all the Hills action with its trademark +/- scale:

Kristin doesn't know if she likes being around Spencer. Does anyone? Plus 3.

Brody on Audrina and Ryan getting serious: "Whatever!" Brody is apparently a 'tween girl. Minus 4, because he's also being forced to care about Ryan by MTV.

Brody and Kristin are meant to be ... MTV decided this week.

We said this yesterday, but if you're parents to a seven-year-old, is there anything worse than a party thrown by Speidi? Were Tiger Woods' mistresses busy? Minus 5.

Audrina and Ryan are at the bowling alley. Audrina talks about Brody Jenner, her past and adds that Brody now has a crush on her. Ooh, the fake plot thickens! Plus 6.

It's time for "the talk" with Ryan. Plus 2, 'cause Ryan is just excited he's landed this gig on The Hills and retained any level of fame. Remember when he was a singer?

Audzo says every time she calls Heidi, Spencer is right there. Kristin Cavallari says Spencer is controlling her. Minus 3 for the girls being three years late to that party.

Spencer, when asked where Stephanie is: "I have a sister?" Plus 10.

Spencer, when Holly Montag dares defend their mother, Darlene, for speaking her mind about Heidi Montag's plastic surgery: "You can leave my property." Plus 11.

Spencer Pratt is seriously losing it.

Ryan wants their relationship to be drama free and the "best relationship ever." Dude, you're fake dating a girl on The Hills. That's not happening. Minus 27.

Brody calls Enzo's party the most awkward of his life. So true. Plus 9.

Kristin Cavallari asks Brody about Audrina over a drink in a typical, staged Hills discussion where they pretend to be conflicted about relationships. Minus 19.

Spencer Pratt, ever eloquent, repeats his earlier claim that Heidi's mom is "just a vagina" who let Heidi come into the world, but is nothing special. Plus 40.

As Holly leaves, Spencer shouts at her that he'll call the cops next time. "Keep walking ... Nobody wants you in Hollywood." Okay, that's enough. Minus 12.

TOTAL: +11. SEASON: +51. Boring as the Kristin-Brody-Audrina "drama" is, Spencer made this episode of The Hills. Dude has serious issues. We love it.

Click to enlarge more pics from the episode ...

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The first season of The Hills seems like ... well, five seasons ago.

Back then, when Heidi Montag was the bubbly, slightly annoying but harmless BFF of Lauren Conrad, things made sense. Times were easier, and they were good.

Fast forward to May 2010 and the surgically enhanced Stepford Wife knockoff can't barely move her face to utter MTV's fake dialogue after all those operations.

In tonight's episode, Heidi gives Spencer Pratt what seems like a pleasant greeting: "Hi honey! Good to see you!" Only she sounds like a robotic, Barbie cyborg.

Having hired a planner to arrange a party for Enzo, the little kid MTV hired to give her baby fever last season, Heidi Montag must still be hurting from surgery.

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt visited a U.S. Marine Corps base earlier this week. Sadly, they were not part of target practice. [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

Seriously, the girl's face cannot move. At. All. Meanwhile, Spencer Pratt's crystals (see last week's episode) clearly aren't working, as he's about to blow a gasket.

These two need psychiatric help, and soon.

However much money Enzo's parents got paid to subject their child to Speidi, it wasn't nearly enough. What party theme could possibly be worse for a little kid?

Okay, maybe One Night with Lindsay Lohan, Tiger Woods' Cocktail Waitress Paradise and The Tattooed White Power Regions of Michelle McGee would be worse.

Follow the jump for a clip from tonight's episode of The Hills ...

Continue Reading...

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The second episode of The Hills' final season focused on nasty rumors and the b!tch who started them. Yes, we know that applies to pretty much every episode.

Lauren Conrad's non-sex tape and Speidi's involvement in spreading that story took up multiple seasons. Is Kristin Cavallari's "drug problem" the new version?

Last night's episode, "Rumor Has It," found her singling out Stephanie as the rumor culprit. Below, THG breaks down the action using our patented +/- scale:

Kristin on Stephanie Pratt and why she'd start rumors: "Because she's crazy, she's a pathological liar, she has nothing going on in her life." All true. Plus 15.

Stacie the Bartender is still around. Does Kristin not have any girlfriends the network didn't create for her? Is Stacie the Bartender her full name? Minus 4.

Brody Jenner: "[Steph] made up these rumors because she is a crazy person. With her past drug addiction, maybe she's mirroring herself." Deep. Plus 7.

Cocaine. It's what's for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Stephanie and Lo read about Kristin's drug use from gossip tabloids and thus think "she is definitely doing drugs," which is hilarious on many levels. Minus 3.

Kristin throws a party to "get to the bottom of this." Or because MTV told her too. Plus 2, because amazingly, the whole cast will be there, including Speidi!

Minus 9 for the lines fed to Brody about Ryan Cabrera and the fake conflict over Audrina. Metrosexual cracks are cliched, and why the eff would Brody care?

LOL, Ryan does look kind of d-bag-ish, however, so Plus 3.

Heidi Montag is, like, excited to debut her new body. Her fam didn't love her new look, but friends think she looks great. Psst ... they're getting paid. Plus 7.

What is Lo even doing on the show at this point? Minus 4.

Stephanie starts to make small talk with Spencer Pratt, but gets so choked up and starts to cry. Spencer berates her. How awesomely dysfunctional. Plus 5.

Comment rendered unnecessary.

Dismayed by family issues, Spencer is carrying around crystals to channel his anger and bring life "peace and balance." What a ridiculous human being. Plus 12.

Kristin says she really doesn't want to be friends with Stephanie because she just likes to create drama. That and 100 other reasons make sense to us. Plus 3.

Nice to see Charlie adopting the Justin-Bobby look. Minus 6.

What's more fake, any dialogue featuring Stephanie and Kristin or Heidi Montag's ginormous, hilarious fake boobs? No points, just throwing that out there.

TOTAL: +30. SEASON: +40. This was The Hills at its best and worst, all at the same time. So much contrived, but entertaining nonsense to go around.

Click to enlarge more pics from the episode ...

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Brody Jenner and Ryan Cabrera "have had some issues in the past."

Or at least since The Hills writers decided to rewrite history, anyway.

Frankie Delgado and Brody Jenner, in a completely unstaged preview from tomorrow's episode, can be seen gossiping about Ryan and whether Brody will try to hit it with Audrina Patridge when the crew all meets at an upcoming party.

While he doesn't go into much detail about said issues, Brody and Frankie do attempt to trash talk Cabrera, but their jokes are as off as his jumpshot.

"It's cool that they're together and stuff because they have a lot in common," Jenner says. "They can borrow each other's jeans ... hair gel." Clank.

A Brody Jenner love triangle is brewing. Does anyone care?

Audrina Patridge and Ryan Cabrera have been together for a few months now ... and we know he's hooked up with her in the past, but watching Brody pretend to care so much about their relationship just comes off as awkward here.

Come on, Hills writers. Can't you feed these guys some better lines? Please try, or just leave the trash talk to Kristin Cavallari, she's the only one with the versatility and track record to do it convincingly week in and week out.

Follow the jump for a sneak preview clip from Tuesday's show...

Continue Reading...

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Drugs. Feuds. Violent outbursts. Unnecessary plastic surgery.

This week's Us Weekly features an expose on how three lives - Kristin Cavallari, Audrina Patridge and Heidi Montag - have been ruined by MTV's The Hills.

The report coincides with The Hills season premiere this week, and amid reports that Heidi is forging a dangerous addiction to painkillers post-surgeries.

"She's a shell of her former self," a show insider said of Montag, whose rep responded to the claims, saying of the story: "This is completely ridiculous."

But is it, though? With allegations of Kristin's drug problem and Audrina wasting away to nothing before our eyes, are these girls all totally lost causes?

And is the reality (term used loosely) show to blame?

Audrina, Heidi and Kristin Cover

Grouping Kristin and Audrina in with Heidi may be a stretch.

"They are addicted to the fame," the source says. "As The Hills winds down and people start to care less, they are desperate to get back that high."

Indeed, Heidi Montag and her husband, Spencer Pratt, have developed increasingly weird behavior. While their 2008 elopement to Mexico was done with their knowing winks, they're recently "crossed over to this bizarre place."

Case in point: The 10 plastic surgery procedures she had in one day last November "because she knew it would be a huge story," an insider says.

Laments pal Jason Wahler, "I knew her when she was normal."

THG NOTE: When Jason Wahler is commenting on how he knew you back when you were normal, you know you have serious, serious problems.

Pals say they've always had a thirst for fame - especially Spencer, who reportedly went after Audrina before pursuing Heidi to get on the show.

Now Montag will never be the same. Says a source who knew Heidi, "She was spellbound. If it weren't for him, she'd be a mom in the suburbs."

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If you love The Hills, last night's premiere (Season 6, Episode 1) was a doozy. If you're so over The Hills by now, this episode is probably a classic example of why.

"Put on a Happy Face" featured Heidi Montag's family trying to do just that ... staring at her face and the rest of her body after 139 unnecessary plastic surgeries.

The Hills final season debut should have come with a "Warning: Disturbing Images" disclaimer. Below, THG breaks down the action using our patented +/- scale:

They should show a close-up shot of Heidi Montag's fake boobs in their hilarious glory as The Hills title card. Although those things are more like a mountain range.

Is it just us or are all of these chicks skinnier, meaner and more annoying than ever? Did MTV unveil new protocol for these mean girl anorexic fembots? Minus 9.

Lo is a full-time cast member at last! Plus 4!

Kristin Cavallari can't believe she's accused of drug use ... despite staying out until 8 a.m. and looking like a stick figure. Minus 5. Where would they get that idea?

Welcome 2 the Freak Show

A face only a mother could love... and even she has a hard time.

Let's run down Heidi Montag's plastic surgery in her own words: "I got a slight eyebrow lift and that's why I got these staples in my head. I had my nose redone, I had my own fat injected into my cheeks. I had my ears pinned back. I had injections into my lips. I had my chin shaved down. I had my breast redone, and my back shaped... and I had a little bit of inner and outer lipo." No points, we just had to.

Heidi's mother Darlene reacts honestly to her daughter's absurd plastic surgeries, asking "why [she] would want to look like Barbie?" Our thoughts exactly. Plus 18.

After Heidi Montag prods further, Darlene says looked "younger and fresher-looking" before. Minus 6, 'cause Heidi would so cry if her face weren't frozen in place.

Kristin is, like, mad that Brody Jenner is flirting with Audrina Patridge. We love Brody, but why keep recycling the same three guys as fake love interests? Minus 7.

Lame Shades

Hard partying Kristin denies she's got a problem.

Wearing sunglasses indoors doesn't make you look cool, Kristin. Minus 4.

Nice of Stephanie to make it out of rehab in time for filming. Plus 3.

Heidi tells her fam they "live in the mountains and wouldn't understand." LOL, as if Crested Butte, Colo., were some backwards, classless, hillbilly dump. Plus 11.

This isn't related, but Spencer Pratt is reportedly on the outs with the show after he refused to start a physical fight with Holly Montag. Yes, Spencer Pratt. Plus 5.

TOTAL: +10. The "reality" of The Hills is always debated, but it more or less on display last night, and we know this because we cover the cast's actual lives daily.

We much prefer episodes like this, whatever the annoyances, to absurd, contrived plot lines such as Speidi's baby argument or Kristin and Justin Bobby "dating."

Click to enlarge more pics from the episode ...

  • Staged Intervention
  • Stacie n' Kristin
  • Hills Girl Talk
  • Oh, K-Cav
  • Brody Macks Audrina
  • A Montag Moment
  • A Confrontation
  • Heidi's Mom is Pissed

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In the first episode of the Hills' maybe-final season, Audrina Patridge, Stephanie Pratt and Lo Bosworth confronted Kristin Cavallari about too much partying.

We'll have a recap of all that action for you a little later, but for now Kristin tells E! she has no such problem, and that the accusations came out of nowhere.

"I went out in Miami and for Super Bowl and had a good time," Cavallari said.

"I'm allowed to do that. But the fact that these girls accuse me of doing drugs, which, by the way, when they bring it up, it's so out of left field."

She thought they were kidding: "I mean, I think I started laughing ... For them to even accuse me of that kind of thing is so crazy, but it is what it is."

Indeed it is.

Kristin laughs off her friends' concerns.

Kristin Cavallari may be thinking about giving it another romantic go with Brody Jenner if the producers tell her to circumstances are right but right now the show's resident bad girl is absolutely, positively single - for better or worse.

"I'm not dating anyone!" The Hills starlet tells us. "It's hard to meet people in L.A., and if I get serious with someone, I don't want to put them on the show."

Fair enough, so what about all those reports of her spending time with Paris Hilton and Lauren Conrad's ex-boyfriend, Doug Reinhardt, at Coachella recently?

"I've known Doug since I was 15 years old," Cavallari laughed. "Yeah, I saw him there, but not like that ... I'm not going to live my life off of stupid celebrity gossip ... We've been friends for almost 10 years."

Unneeded tabloid attention aside, Cavallari doesn't regret returning to The Hills: "I've had such a great time and it's been great on so many levels."

In other Cavallari news, she says Dancing With the Stars has come calling.

"A few different seasons ... I don't think I could do it. I have a serious fear of public speaking, let along dancing in front of all those people. I'd be a nervous wreck."

Now, strutting around in a bikini, that's a different ballgame.

The Hills Quotes

Brody's girlfriend is pretty. With very large breasts.

Lauren Bosworth [on Cora Skinner]

Someone with a great sense of humor is the most important thing, and someone who really supports me in everything I do... I don’t ever want to make an excuse for trying to work hard and having my own life. I love a guy that supports that and loves that.

Lauren Conrad [on men]
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