Because our standard weekly recaps are clearly not enough to quench your thirst for The Bachelor gossip, commentary and insight, The Hollywood Gossip's own Bachelor Babe will be sharing her thoughts on each exciting episode with us, as well.
Here's her take on Jason Mesnick and his beautiful, totally unscripted New Zealand dates with the remaining trio of suitors...
Well hello there, Jason - nice first shot of you standing on a rock in the middle of the New Zealand ocean. I can tell you're serious by your words: "I know my wife is one of those three girls."
We're in for a solemn night, I can tell already. Nothing like the dead doves from last week.
Jason and Jillian "soar to new heights," according to the announcer, but any faithful watcher knows this isn't true - he's soared to various heights in a blimp with Melissa, on a tour of Vegas with the blonde girl whose name I can't even remember, and with Naomi in an "extreme" rock gym. Not to mention the 12-hour flight to New Zealand with Melissa, Molly and Jillian.
We're watching you too, Announcer. You can't get away with stuff like this.
I know this was already covered here on THG, but I can't help but comment on it myself: According to Jason, "it was just the two of us" on the cliff overlooking New Zealand.
Awww so sweet! Our little Jason is so lovestruck that he can't even remember all the other people that are there! Like the pilot, and the cameramen, and the producers, and the microphone guy, and the script writers... oh wait.
I'll tell you who wasn't on the helicopter with the cozy couple: the wardrobe people. Nice plaid, flannel shirts guys. This isn't 1995. Script writers were DEFINITELY on board, though, there's no way Jason could come up with "We're standing on the edge of a cliff, and so is our relationship," and "I mean, is it too much to ask for the world?"
On his second date, Jason takes Molly to a bridge where they can see "the best view in New Zealand," and then bungee jump off of it. The third wheel (darn script writers) come, too, evidenced by Molly making metaphorical comments about how jumping off a bridge is kind of like the big leap of jumping into a relationship. Wait, that's a simile, but "simile-al comments" doesn't work.
Those script writers are professionals! Can't they coach Molly with better lines than that!?!??!