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We almost feel like we owe Rebecca Black an apology.

After seeing her pawn her daughter off on her parents last night on Teen Mom, it's good to see Farrah Abraham is putting all her free time to good use.

She recently came out with her book, My Teenage Dream Ended, and now, having just wrapped her new album, has leaked a preview of the first song.

“I'm happy again, and this is my song for finding happiness,” Farrah Abraham tells In Touch of the track, titled “Finally Getting up From Rock Bottom.”

A nice sentiment, but from the opening lyrics - Dude (ahhh!) dude (ahhh!) - it's clear the song is beyond terrible / unintentionally hilarious. Listen:

With overproduced vocals, nonsensical lyrics and zero coherence, "Finally Getting Up From Rock Bottom" makes "Friday" look like Grammy material.

Farrah says the song is about going inside and really digging deep in order to find the strength to climb out of the hole she’d found herself in.

Explains the 21-year-old MTV reality star and mother of Sophia, “After almost wanting to kill myself, I found meaning and happiness within.”

We're certainly glad she was able to search within herself and slay some of her demons. Now she just needs to search for a better career.

What's your take on Farrah's new song ...

 

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The terrible twos can be tough to handle ... at least for those of us who can't just ship their kid off to grandma's for a few weeks and let her deal with it.

Such is the (tough) life for Farrah Abraham.

You could see that coming from the second she said she was going to school full time and far from Iowa. What led her to make this major life decision?

Find out in THG's Teen Mom recap!

Teen Mom Cast Photo

Sophia is just too much for Farrah. Minus 10. The little one will be better off at home with her grandparents, but the whole situation could be prevented.

Farrah is just too busy, studying mixology and horseback riding, barbecue and cattle ... oh wait, that's just to go to Texas with her boyfriend. Minus 10.

At least he's mom-approved this time. Plus 5.

Will Farrah and Daniel still be together when Sophia returns? Do you want them to be? You want her to be happy, but take her role as mom seriously.

Score it Even until further notice, we guess.

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Jenelle Evans, possibly the craziest MTV reality star of all time - not a small feat mind you - has certainly proven adept at dropping her pants.

Dropping Kieffer Delp, conversely, is something she hasn't mastered.

Once again, she is back with the deadbeat who's gotten physical with her more than once and supposedly leaked Jenelle Evans nude photos after she dumped him.

All water under the naked bridge now, though, apparently. They're totally gonna last this time. Speaking of naked pics, here's one Kieffer recently Tweeted!

  • Jenelle Evans Nude Photo
  • Jenelle Evans Tattoo

As unappealing as it is to see Kieffer clutching Jenelle's bare behind, it's good to see the violent, restraining order days are behind them ... for now.

Speaking of violence and restraining orders, Jenelle Evans is in the process of getting one against ex-fiance Gary Head, who she split with in July.

Kieffer allegedly spiraled into a rage upon seeing Gary (who Jenelle accuses of assault), chasing him around the parking lot at Jenelle's court date Monday.

A day in the life of Jenelle Evans. Poor Jace.

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Teen Mom star Farrah Abraham recently felt so depressed that she considered suicide, she admitted in an interview while promoting her new book.

"All I could think about was killing myself," she says, and she even mapped out some specifics. "I figured I would drown myself in the bathtub."

"That seemed like the easiest way to go."

Farrah Abraham Book

In My Teenage Dream Ended, the now-21-year-old single mother says her lowest point occurred two years after her daughter Sophia's birth.

Raising Sophia alone, coupled with the tragic death of her ex, Derek Underwood, in a car accident when she was pregnant, was too much to bear.

"We hadn't spoken in more than two months," Farrah says about her ex-boyfriend, "but crazily I had still hoped we had a future together."

Before she was diagnosed with clinical depression, Farrah Abraham says she coped with her issues via alcohol, cocaine and marijuana abuse.

Only after therapy and medication is she "back on track."

"I was being selfish," she says. "The most important thing is making sure that [Sophia's] well taken care of - how am I going to do that if I'm dead?"

A fair point. One that Amber Portwood, who's allegedly tried to take her own life as well, should consider as she serves out her prison sentence.

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Teen Mom star Maci Bookout broke up with Kyle King after two years of dating this winter, but sources report that their relationship is NOT over.

Bookout, 20, moved out of the home they shared with her son Bentley, 3, and into a bachelorette pad in Chattanooga, Tenn., with some friends.

Much as that would signal that she and Kyle were over for good, Maci, 20, is on the brink of reuniting with Kyle, 24, a source tells Us Weekly:

"They still hook up, and lately they've been inseparable."

Maci Bookout and Kyle King Photo

Why the change of heart? A wake-up call courtesy of the Teen Mom season premiere, when she watched a now year-old fight with King play out.

"It made her realize how crazy she'd been acting," says the insider.

The MTV reality star isn't opposed to a long-term relationship with King, but realizes that the key to a lasting bond is a bit of distance short-term.

"I think Kyle and I could make things work right now," she says. "But we'd rather figure ourselves out first and then try to make a life together."

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't think [Kyle was The One]," Maci Bookout says of her man. "But I'm only 20. There's no need to rush into anything."

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Guess it's pretty obvious Catelynn Lowell is not pregnant.

In a recent Twitter photo, the Teen Mom star showed that she's shed 22 pounds since she joined Weight Watchers last summer, and she's not done yet!

"I was more than 165 pounds, which is so gross!" the 5-foot-2 reality star admitted. "Now I'm 144. I only have 20 more to lose until I'm at my goal."

Check out the photo of her new, thinner frame below:

Catelynn Lowell Weight Loss

The bride-to-be says she'll fit in her dream wedding dress, too: "I put it on and started bawling. I knew that was it. I love it and can't wait to wear it!"

During the Teen Mom season premiere, she tweeted, "I can't believe how much weight I have lost watching this makes me want to lose way more!"

And her fiance Tyler Baltierra, 20, makes for a good workout partner. The MTV stars hit the gym three times a week, and he's her biggest fan!

Baltierra also Tweeted his support for her weight loss, writing, "Cate has lost so much weight, I never even noticed before! Good job babe."

With a photo, he said, "See her now! Freaking love her."

Aww. One thing they don't freaking love is the rumors that they're having another baby. Apparently Cate's mom impersonated her and told a tabloid.

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Teen Mom's Catelynn Lowell is not happy about recent tabloid reports that she's pregnant again (she's not), and points the finger at a surprising figure.

Earlier this month, In Touch matter-of-factly declared that she and fiance Tyler Baltierra were happily expecting a child. This was not the case. At all.

“I want to set the record straight. I’m not pregnant,” Catelynn said. “My mom lied.”

Wait, what?

Catelynn Lowell Pregnancy Hoax

The shocking deception started in early June, when the reality star's mom, April Baltierra, informed the magazine that Catelynn Lowell is pregnant again.

April arranged for a friend to "confirm" it in an interview and even sent documentation of the pregnancy from a doctor who supposedly treated Cate.

Then, a woman identifying herself as Catelynn did a phone interview with the celebrity gossip magazine - from a cell phone with Tyler’s voicemail on it.

A private investigator “with beyond a reasonable degree of professional certainty” that the voice of the interview subject “is the voice of the mother.”

“I love my mom, but it’s frustrating,” says the college student. "It crosses the line.”

Continue Reading...

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Teen Mom had a beach party last night, all across this great nation.

Maci Bookout invited herself along on vacation with baby daddy' Ryan Edwards' family, as we saw on last week's installment, while Amber welcomed Gary and Leah to Malibu rehab center, and Farrah showed off her fake boobs in Florida.

Catelynn Lowell? No beach for her. Just Butch!

Come along for THG's Teen Mom recap!

Teen Mom Cast Photo

After 90 days behind bars, Tyler's dad is out of jail and crashing again at his son and stepdaughter's place, after testing positive for drugs or violating a restraining order / contacting his ex-wife. We forget.

Honestly it's way too hard to keep track with Butch these days. Minus 20.

Wouldn't you know, guy promptly breaks his curfew. Shocker. Minus 4.

"Dude, it's almost midnight and I'm sitting up waiting for my 50-year-old father," Tyler laments. When Butch does show up, the next day, Tyler tells him that the next time he decides to pull that he's kicking him out. Way to be, Ty. Plus 14.

Amber Portwood, meanwhile, is disappointed to learn that and Gary can't be around Leah at the same time. Gotta love restraining orders. Minus 42.

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The first photographic proof of Jenelle Evans' latest arrest has surfaced.

The Teen Mom 2 star found herself in a North Carolina jail cell yet again this weekend after allegedly assaulting someone early Sunday morning.

Cops have not released the victim's name, but it is believed to be her fiance Gary Head, who was also reportedly arrested for domestic violence.

Whatever happened, Jenelle appears quite sad in her mug shot:

Jenelle Evans Mugshot (New)

According to the Brunswick County (N.C.) Sheriff's Office, the MTV star was also in possession of marijuana at the time of the incident. Big surprise.

Jenelle Evans posted bail and has since been released.

Gary Head's status is unclear, but if he attacked Jenelle has some sources have reported, her on/off fiance could be spending a while behind bars.

The 20-year-old has been busted more times than we can count, including in January for violating a restraining order and allegedly threatening her ex-roommate, in March for stalking, and of course last year for beating up Britany Truett.

Somehow we doubt this mug shot will be her last.

UPDATE: Gary's mug shot has been released:

Continue Reading...

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She may be behind bars, but Teen Mom star Amber Portwood is willing to do whatever it takes to maintain a relationship with her 3-year-old daughter, Leah.

Or at least she was, before she chose prison over her child.

It's this sad turn of events that makes the final season of Teen Mom so gut wrenching. On tonight's episode, her time in rehab in Malibu, Calif., is chronicled.

Gary Shirley's ex-fiancee receives a visit from Leah and her father, but their reunion doesn't exactly go off without a hitch, thanks in part to a court order.

Amber Pic

The Aeropostale-shirt-wearing Gary was shocked to find out that he's barred, legally, from being in the same room with his ex and daughter simultaneously.

"I brought Leah with me but I guess we can't be together," he says, and after an embrace, the couple part ways so Amber Portwood can visit with Leah.

"This is where Mommy's been living for a while," Portwood tells her.

Despite her recent legal troubles, Portwood has vowed to keep up her relationship with Shirley and their little girl as much as possible while behind bars.

Good luck with that, given your five-year sentence. Hopefully Jenelle Evans and Gary Head take note, because they're heading down the same road.

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