by Free Britney at

Jersey Shore Snooki has reportedly been offered a three-year, $100,000 deal to be the face of a porn provider. Like Nadya Suleman, we're guessing she'll pass.

According to reports, Flesh Drive wants Snooki (Nicole Polizzi) to perform duties as the spokesperson for the company, which they specify is a non-sexual role ...

“Our company image is that we pack a big punch in a little package,” Vice President of Sales Michael Gruosso wrote in a letter to the Jersey Shore cast member.

Snooki P.

“Who better to endorse our product than the woman who does exactly that? We know that Snooki makes a big impression wherever she goes, and that is why both her tiny figure and incredible attitude will fit perfectly within our world."

The sales pitch concludes with a compelling argument: "By merging Snooki with the Flesh Drive, she will make a great amount of money by doing very little.”

Maybe so, but she'd still have to endorse ... porn. The specification that it's not a sexual role is great, too. As if the idea would be so offensive to ... porn fans.

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by Free Britney at

The foreclosure watch is on, and the clock is ticking. Octomom Nadya Suleman has until October 9 to cough up some serious cash or lose her home.

Her prospects for financial solvency are looking about as bad as the odds of her public humiliation are good, but her prayers may still be answered.

All thanks to a generous, PG-13 offer from an adult film company.

Swingin' Octo

Will Octomom ride Vivid's new offer to financial recovery?

Vivid Entertainment has been trying to get Nadya Suleman to star in a hard core porn flick for months, a prospect she has rebuffed unequivocally.

Given her reluctance, Vivid president Steve Hirsch has tailored his offer, and is now trying to get her a job - as a production assistant on XXX films!

Hirsch is willing to pay her $1,000 a day to be a member of his production crew, a job where she wouldn't even have to have sex or get naked.

A grand per day. That's a lot of money, even if "production assistant" is kind of a "fluff" job, if you get what we're saying. Please tell us you to.

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by Free Britney at

Amy Fisher became famous for shooting her lover's wife in the face as a teenager. Then she starred in her own sex tape after she got out of prison. Living the dream.

Apparently she was so inspired by the aforementioned romp that she's making it a full-time profession. That's right, get ready for the blockbuster release of 2010:

Deep Inside Amy Fisher. Wonder what the plot is ...

SO SEDUCTIVE: A glimpse of the unrivaled passion that is Amy Fisher.

Fisher said she got to work with some of the sexiest men in porn, such as Tommy Gunn and Dale Dabone, as well as doing a girl-on-girl-scene with Lisa Ann.

“Working with Lisa Ann was absolutely amazing,” Fisher said. “She is stunning, erotic, and was an absolute thrill. I can’t wait to make more movies with her."

Dale Dabone, of course, used to give da bone to Jennifer Capriati, and blamed the tennis champ's recent drug overdose on his return to porn after a hiatus.

What does this have to do with Fisher? Nothing. We're just saying.

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by Hilton Hater at

Can an adult movie star go mainstream? Sasha Grey sure hopes so.

Following a lead performance in Steven Soderbergh’s 2009 movie The Girlfriend Experience, this long-time porn actress joined the Entourage cast this season and covers the latest issue of Playboy.

Unlike other women famous for getting naked, Grey is clearly proud of her (literal) body of work and makes no excuses for the path she's taken to get here. Are you listening, Karissa Shannon? Check out Grey's Playboy cover below:

Continue Reading...

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by Hilton Hater at

In news almost as shocking as The Bachelorette scripting and filming multiple endings, Amy Fisher has announced the official start to her porn career.

She'll produce and star in four movies for Dreamzone Entertainment (which lists their new employee as possessing “incredible D-cup size breasts"), beginning with The Making of Amy Fisher: Porn Star.

Says the woman who rose to fame in 1992 for sleeping with Joey Buttafuoco and then shooting his wife in the face, a crime for which Fisher spent seven years in prison:

“Our society loves sex. It feels so good and we should enjoy it. Sex is beautiful, powerful, and simply put, no one has the right to tell me what I can or can not do with my own private parts. This time, I get to make the choices on what kind of movies I want to make."

Fisher is taking a jab at her ex-husband with that last comment, as he released a sex tape in 2007 that she claimed to play no role in releasing.

Fast forward three years, though, and Amy has taken a classic saying and turned it around a bit: if you can't beat 'em, join 'em... while naked and open for business.

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by Hilton Hater at

You'll never believe this, but a woman who starred on For the Love of Ray J has made the move to porn.

Granted, that's about a six-inch step away from the reality show on which she appeared, but fans of that VH1 series are still buzzing over the news that Bethany Benz is now an adult movie actress.

Derek Lowe Mug Shot

She went by the name "Caviar" on the dating competition - and if the man who made Kim Kardashian famous had known she'd end up in this industry, he likely would have proposed to Benz on the spot.

Of Russian and Nigerian descent, Caviar has grinded in music videos for R. Kelly and posed in photo shoots for Motorsports Magazine, Jet Magazine, and Rolling Out Magazine.

She goes all the way in a film produced by Bang Bros., a photo from which you can view HERE. It's not exactly safe for work, but trust us: it's the safest image we could legally publish on this site.

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by Hilton Hater at

Reading through a handful of The Simpsons quotes? Hilarious.

Ogling one of those cartoon characters in the buff? Creepy and unexpected.

But try telling that to Hugh Hefner. The blue-haired matriarch of everyone's favorite fake family graces the cover of next month's Playboy, as Marge Simpson does her best Tila Tequila impression.

As a housewife and mother of three, we fear that Marge's pictorial - which includes a three-page spread and interview - sets a bad example. What will Maggie think when she gets old enough to use Google? How will Bart's classmates react to these images?

It's really all the fault of Kate Gosselin. Clearly jealous of the attention that famous mom has received, Marge set out to reclaim the spotlight. Mission (grossly) accomplished...

Marge Simpson Nude

Marge Simpson in Playboy: Cool or creepy?

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by Hilton Hater at

What's the next best thing to Robert Pattinson nude?

Okay, it's Robert Pattinson shirtless.

But what's the next best thing after this that will satisfy Twilight Saga fans? That's easy:

An adult film actor pretending to be Pattinson's Edward Cullen and making love on camera to a faux Bella Swan.

That's exactly what fans can expect in This Isn't Twilight: The XXX Parody, a pornographic movie that officially proves Twlight has gone mainstream. The flick will be released on October 15.

Which movie are you more likely to see?

Taking over the role of Bella from Kristen Stewart will be Jenna Haze, the Female Performer of the Year at the 2009 AVN Awards. She has anchored such mature fare as Spunk'd 6, Load Warrios and This Ain't the Munsters XXX.

For the record, the first 29 installments of This Ain't the Munsters were much better.

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by Free Britney at

NFL star, malcontent and Tony Romo teammate Terrell Owens is bitching that he's no porn star, despite a picture of him allegedly walking onto the set of an adult film, as depicted on a hard core adult website.

The photo shows the Dallas Cowboys wide receiver strolling into an adult photo shoot with a huge smile on his face. The shot somehow wound up on TheDirty.com, with the clever headline "T.O. Loves Porn."

Terrell Owens? Not thrilled about this development. He immediately dispatched his legal team to clean up the mess, an the story no longer appears.

Owens, Terrell

A cease and desist letter was sent to TheDirty.com explaining that Terrell Owens "unknowingly walked into" the sticky situation. Mmm hmm.

Lawyers for the crybaby football star demanded the site take down the pics of Terrell and implicitly "state to the public that these photographs linking Mr. Owens to porn were not done with his consent."

As much as it sounds absurd that he could walk onto the set of a porno by mistake, we must keep in mind that this took place in South Beach.

Maybe he's telling the truth ... and we need a Florida vacation about now.

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by Mischalova at

And to think, Paulina James thought she had the celebrity porn movie world all to herself.

The adult film star, who will be portraying Lindsay Lohan nude in an upcoming flick, now must deal with the fact this sex-filled spoof won't be the only title of its kind coming out in the near future.

A Harlow Smile

Venom Digital Media is releasing Paris and Nicole Go to Jail in September, a very x-rated version of the thin stars' jail hijinks.

Sindee Jennings and Aubrey Addams (what, was Kendra Jade unavailable?) will be filling the talentless, law-breaking shoes of these socialites, as they find "that life is different on the inside, and at first have trouble adapting, but soon learn how to get things in prison by becoming friendly with the warden, the guards, the inmates."

We think Stavros Niarchos is familiar with how Hilton goes about doing that!

Nicole Richie is pregnant now, of course, so she may wish to keep her future child away from the porn aisles when he or she gets older.

As for her skanky friend, well, a Paris Hilton sex tape is nothing new. This one just won't be starring the spoiled heiress herself is all.

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