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After a jury found John Edwards not guilty on one count and declared itself deadlocked on another five charges on Thursday, the two-time Presidential candidate accepted full responsibility for his "sins" even as he maintained he did nothing illegal.

The politician, who is unlikely to be retried for alleged campaign finance fraud, spoke emotionally about his 4-year-old daughter with mistress Rielle Hunter.

Despite his sensational and stunning fall from grace, Edwards professed his love for "my precious Quinn, who I love more than any of you could ever imagine."

"I am so close to and so, so grateful for [her] ... I'm so grateful for Quinn."

It was Edwards' alleged efforts to use illegal campaign contributions to cover up his affair with Hunter that stood at the center of his federal corruption trial.

After praising the jury as "an exemplar of what jurors are supposed to do," he said, "I want to make sure that everyone hears from me and from my voice."

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In the wake of reports that bath salts may have played a role in Saturday's Miami zombie apocalypse attack, the U.S. Senate passed a bill to ban the substances.

Federal legislation criminalizing synthetic marijuana and some bath salts passed the Senate today and is now on its way to the House of Representatives.

The law was not passed as a result of the zombie apocalypse, but as part of the FDA Safety and Innovation Act, championed by Sen. Charles Schumer.

Eugene and Poppo

"Let this be a warning to those who make a profit manufacturing and selling killer chemical components to our teens and children," Schumer (D-NY) said.

"This bill closes loopholes that have allowed manufacturers to circumvent local and state bans," he said of the effort to ban "these deadly synthetic drugs."

Last Saturday, Rudy Eugene, 31, was shot dead by local police on the off-ramp of the MacArthur Causeway in Miami. He was eating another man's face.

As a police officer told Eugene to get off Ronald Poppo, he "just stood ... with pieces of flesh in his mouth and he growled," eyewitness Larry Vega said.

An ER doctor at the local Jackson Memorial Hospital told the Herald that Eugene's attack may have been brought on by psychosis caused by bath salts.

The extreme violence, super-human strength and an urge to shed clothes all correspond with reports of bath salt usage around the United States.

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John Edwards was found not guilty on one of six counts in his campaign finance fraud trial today, with the jury hopelessly deadlocked on the remaining charges.

Judge Catherine Eagles declared a mistrial on the five counts for which the jury couldn't reach a verdict. He can therefore be retried, but it's unlikely he will be.

Edwards, a two-time presidential candidate, was accused of soliciting nearly $1 million from donors to cover up his affair and love child with Rielle Hunter.

He was found unanimously not guilty on Count 3 of the six-part indictment.

John Edwards is Pumped!

That count pertained only to whether Edwards illegally received hundreds of thousands of dollars from heiress Rachel "Bunny" Mellon to cover up the affair.

Just hours ago, the foreman announced that the jury was deadlocked on five of the six counts, but Eagles ordered them to go back to deliberating.

The jury came back less than an hour later and declared itself hung, or deadlocked with no possibility of changing that fact, on the five counts.

Following the verdict, the two-time presidential hopeful hugged attorney Abbe Lowell, his daughter Cate Edwards, 30, and his two elderly parents.

The jury began deliberating May 18 in the case, which took on an air of a steamy soap opera as much as a debate over intricacies of campaign finance law.

The government spent three weeks building its thin case, much of it tethered to the testimony of Andrew Young, once Edwards' most loyal aide.

Edwards' defense - that he lied to keep the affair a secret from his terminally ill wife, not to advance his career - was tough to disprove, however.

He's a miserable human being, but that doesn't mean he acted illegally.

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Detainees at Guantanamo Bay subjected to Sesame Street music for days on end in efforts to break their will, according to an Al Jazeera documentary.

In the film, called "Songs of War," detainees at the U.S. Naval base have been forced to wear headphones blaring Sesame Street music on repeat.

All in the name of messing with them so badly that they'll talk.

The award-winning Sesame Street composer Christopher Cerf (2:00 mark above) tells Al Jazeera, "My first reaction was 'this just can't possibly be true.'"

"I didn't care for the idea that I was helping break down prisoners, but it was much worse when I heard later that they were actually using the music in Guantanamo for long-term interrogations and obviously to inflict pain on prisoners so they would talk."

Wow. Elmo can get a little annoying after awhile, but really?

Note to CIA operatives: LFO's "Summer Girls" would work a lot better, or anything by that rumored hermaphrodite Lady Gaga. The extremists HATE her.

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A federal judge told jurors in the John Edwards trial that they must continue deliberating, just moments after the jury announced a verdict - on one of six counts.

The courtroom was briefly thrown into confusion this afternoon in Greensboro, N.C.

All sides were told a verdict had been reached, but once in court, the jury announced it had only reached a unanimous verdict on Count 3 of the indictment.

On the other five counts, the jury was deadlocked. The Count 3 verdict was not read.

Edwards, J

Edwards' defense team asked the judge to accept the verdict on Count 3 and declare a mistrial on other charges. The judge considered, but denied that motion.

Judge Catherine Eagles told the jury, who has been deliberating in the case since May 18, must continue to work towards a verdict on the other charges.

The trial centers around whether Edwards illegally received over $700,000 in donations to conceal his illicit affair and illegitimate child with Rielle Hunter.

The nearly month-long trial at times sounded more like a steamy soap opera about his life than a trial on the intricacies of campaign finance rules.

Charged with six counts of violating federal campaign laws, Edwards was accused of soliciting money to cover up his affair and advance his election bid.

If convicted, Edwards faces up to 30 years in prison and be fined more than $1 million, although it is unlikely he will face the most severe penalties.

Any lies John told, his lawyers, were to keep the affair a secret from his wife, Elizabeth, who was dying of cancer, not to advance his political career.

In short, being an ass is not illegal.

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An appeals court ruled Thursday that the Defense of Marriage Act, a law that essentially denies a host of benefits to gay married couples, is unconstitutional.

The 1st U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Boston said the law, which defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman, discriminates against gay couples.

Ya think?

DOMA

The law was passed in 1996 by a Republican-led Congress at a time when it appeared as if Hawaii would become the first state to legalize gay marriage.

Since then, many states have instituted their own bans on gay marriage, while eight states have approved it. Massachusetts was the first in 2004.

The appeals court ruled the DOMA is unconstitutional because it interferes with the right of a state to define marriage and denies married gay couples federal benefits given to heterosexual married couples, including the ability to file joint tax returns.

Somewhere in Indiana, this church kid is singing an angry song.

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Good thing Mitt Romney won the GOP presidential nomination Tuesday night, as he may need some positive headlines to overshadow this awesome typo.

Twitter is ablaze with commentary this morning after it came to light that the Romney campaign's newly iPhone app, "With Mitt," misspelled "America."

The free app allows supporters to personalize pics superimposed with phrases like "I stand with Mitt," "Obama isn't working" and "American Greatness."

Or perhaps "Amercian" greatness would be more accurate:

Amercia

Unfortunately for the candidate - and more so the developer who gets fired - one of the slogans amusingly plasters "A Better Amercia" across the image.

"Mistakes happen," Andrea Saul, Romney Press Secretary, said in an appearance on MSNBC this morning. "I don't think any voter cares about a typo."

Probably not, but it does make for some comic relief - especially from Mitt the micro-manager - amid a steady stream of often contentious political news.

BTW, as of now, the app still had not been fixed. Programmers ...

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Having effectively won through attrition weeks ago, Mitt Romney officially wrapped up the Republican nomination for president last night with a win in the Texas primary.

Romney's win put an end to the GOP primary as the former Massachusetts Governor began to ramp up his general election message against President Obama.

Just after 9 p.m., he Tweeted: "#1144. Thank You. Whatever challenges lie ahead, we will settle for nothing less than getting America back on the path to prosperity."

Mitt Romney Wins Primary

Despite surpassing the 1,144 delegate threshold, it was just a token evening for the presumptive nominee, whose rivals exited one by one over a month ago.

Only Ron Paul is still fighting for delegates. With the White House out of reach, he seeks a prominent role at the party's convention and in shaping its future.

Romney didn’t make a speech last night, but the win was nonetheless symbolic, making him the first Mormon to be a major-party candidate for the presidency.

The timing couldn’t have been better, as he is now being treated as an equal to Obama by the national media in what is sure to be a very close 2012 election.

He’s pulled almost even with the president in voter surveys, currently trailing by just two percentage points in aggregated national polls, 45.6 to 43.6 percent.

Romney probably has a 50-50 chance of being the 45th President of the United States. He'll distance himself from Donald Trump if he's smart. Just saying.

If the election were held today, for whom would you vote?

 

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Conservative columnist George Will slammed Donald Trump as a moronic blowhard this weekend, prompting a blistering, unintentionally hilarious response from the Celebrity Apprentice star, who has been campaigning with Mitt Romney.

The GOP presidential candidate has taken a lot of heat for appearing with Trump at a campaign fundraiser. Will criticized the move, as well as Trump personally.

“I do not understand the cost-benefit here,” Will said on ABC’s This Week. “The costs are clear. The benefit - what voter is going to vote for him because of Donald Trump?"

"The cost of appearing with a bloviating ignoramus is obvious, it seems to me."

Will-Trump

"Donald Trump is redundant evidence that if your net worth is high enough, your IQ can be very low and you can still intrude into American politics.”

Bloviating ignoramus ... wow. George Will FTW. Fortunately, Trump took the high road with his response ... just kidding. Did you really fall for that?

“George Will may be the dumbest (and most overrated) political commentator of all time,” he tweeted. “If the Republicans listen to him, they will lose.”

Oh, and it continues. He adds: “Losers such as George Will and Rosie O'Donnell use me to get publicity for themselves. They are strictly third rate.”

“George Will totally ‘bombed’ at The Mar-a-Lago Club. I was there to watch. He was embarrassed and no longer likes Donald Trump.”

Yes ... what you just witnessed is Trump insulting Will AND name-checking his own elite Palm Beach real estate property! The Donald FTW!

Will did speak at the Trump’s opulent Palm Beach club ... in 1995. He has yet to respond to the Mar-a-Lago crack ... and really, how do you recover from that?!

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MSNBC's Chris Hayes sparked major controversy and debate when he said that he felt uncomfortable using the word "hero" for members of the U.S. military.

Hayes' point was that the word is inadvertently used to start more potentially unjust wars - not unreasonable - but now says his own word choice was poor.

After speaking with a former Marine whose job it was to notify families of the death of soldiers, he said that while he means no disrespect to those who serve us all, the word "seems to be rhetorically proximate to justifications for more war."

Hayes also said that, on the flip side, it is "noble" to join the military.

While a "liberal caricature" like himself would not truly understand "submitting so totally to what the electorate or people in power are going to decide about using your body," Hayes conceded, he saw valor in it.

Nevertheless, Hayes' words, on Memorial Day of all days, caused a predictable furor with some. He issued a statement Monday apologizing for his comments:

In discussing the uses of the word "hero" to describe those members of the armed forces who have given their lives, I don't think I lived up to the standards of rigor, respect and empathy for those affected by the issues we discuss that I've set for myself.

I am deeply sorry for that.

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