MySpace

Antonella Barba will have the last laugh. How do we know?

The former American Idol singer told us herself.

On her new MySpace page - found in the website's Music section - Antonella has changed her name from "I Just Look Like Her" to, well, Antonella Barba. And her personal quote is: "I'll have the last laugh."

And what can you find on her music page?

A downloadable version of her a capella audition song, "Free." There's also the horrendous rendition of Aerosmith's "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" that got this beauty kicked off the show in favor of, you know, talented crooners such as Melinda Doolittle.

Anyway, we're sorry, fellas. We know this isn't exactly the Antonella Barba photo you were hoping to see on this post.

Look, if you think certain Antonella Barba photos are actually her, then you just need to hear from the American Idol vixen herself on the topic.

What better place to get the proof you need than Antonella's MySpace page?

As Shanna Moakler and other celebrities have proven, this is a useful forum for denouncing more than just sexy photos. You can slam ex-husbands here, bitterly diss Chris Daughtry and trash your former stylist.

Anyway, Barba claims that she merely looks like the girl in those infamous oral sex pics. She also appears to encourage everyone to keep talking about her.

So consider this a favor to the Katie Rees of American Idol.

In case you're wondering about the status of Shanna Moakler and her ex-husband, don't worry. The former beauty queen has cleared it up the only mature way celebrities know how:

MySpace.

Despite having been seen in public with Travis Barker a lot recently, Shanna insists there are no romantic intentions. It's all for the kids, supposedly.

Here is her recent MySpace posting, word for ungrammatical word:

"travis and i are not back together. we are working on being good friends and even better parents, we did celebrate our daughters first birthday at disney with our friends and family and our children it was really fun!"

Moakler did not mention whether or not her current beau, porn legend Jay Grdina, was present at the celebration.

The former Miss USA also had no comment on the latest beauty pageant to lose her crown: Ashley Harder.

No one has heard much from Melissa Joan Hart in recent years.

Maybe it's because her hit shows, Clarissa Explains it All and Sabrina the Teenage Witch are no longer on the air. And may not really qualify as hit shows.

Or maybe it's because she's an immature, homophobic biatch. It's apparently very possible. At least if you check out a recent posting on her MySpace page, where she lashes out at American Idol singing sensation Chris Daughtry.

Seriously. Click here and read it. Hart is coming to the defense of Mark Wilkerson, her husband (pictured with the has-been above) and a member of the band Course of Nature. Melissa insists Wilkerson wrote most of the single "It's Not Over," which appears on Daughtry's debut album... albeit with a different chorus.

Here's what she writes:

Chris Daughtry must be stopped
I am so sick of all the articles saying Chris wrote the song "It's Not Over". Then the other day I saw in In touch that Ace Young is taking credit as well. Bulls*&%t. Mark fully wrote everybit of that song except the new lyrics in the chorus... which are gay anyhow. Mark wrote the song about his ex- manager screwing him over and they turned it into a fairy love song. Anyway just wanted to vent and give my man his due credit. If anyone agrees, write in to the rags and let em have it. I am!!!

Wow. She's not jealous or anything. We're all about using MySpace to bash other celebrities, but this is easily the lamest example since Nicole Richie's Rachel Zoe rant.

Wonder how Chris Daughtry would take to hearing his song's chorus called "gay." Probably about as well as Reichen Lehmkuhl would take to having his love life blogged about by Perez Hilton. And if Chris cranks out "fairy" love songs, where does that leave Clay Aiken songs, Melissa? Care to expound on that?

We may not be able to pronounce his name, but we are able to commend Reichen Lehmkuhl for standing up against ugly, pompous celebrity bloggers.

No, not The Hollywood Gossip. We have nothing but respect for Reichen and his relationship with Lance Bass (which IS still on, by the way).

We're speaking, of course, about that lawbreaker, Perez Hilton. Lehmkuhl recently went off on the fake journalist for accusing Reichen of cheating on Bass.

Like any star, Lemkuhl took his fight to the world of MySpace. Once there, he slammed Hilton for referring to he and Lance as "Princess Frostylocks and The Third Reich." In turn, he called Perez a "Big (blank) Ugly Liar, an Accused Thief and Criminal."

It. Is. On.

Reichen said that Perez's report that he made out without someone other than Bass at a party is a "blantant lie" [sic], and that Perez erroneously reported that the former *NSYNCer and Amazing Race winner had broken up.

"Contrary to what this ugly wind-bag has reported, I have not broken up with my boyfriend. I did not go home with anyone from Survivor from any party..."

Reichen then defended himself against Hilton hullabaloo that he was dating Bass for money. Sounds to us like Lemkuhl is about to go all Katie Couric on Perez's posterior.

We can't wait.

It looks like Paris Hilton never came to former BFF Britney Spears' defense in cyberspace after all - and instead, is the latest Hollywood "star" to incur the wrath of MySpace impersonators!

News reports from several "reputable" sources have been reporting that Paris used her MySpace page to defend the parenting skills of Britney Spears, which have been called into question.

Which isn't too surprising, as the mother of two spends more time galavanting around and displaying her enormous breasts than anything else.

But it turns out that the blog in question does not belong to Paris.

In the fake MySpace page, the "heiress" supposedly states that Britney is a great parent who is, and who has always been there for her children, and that Spears' partying is considered normal behavior for any 25-year-old.

While these are thoughts that certainly could be floating around inside Hilton's tiny brain, that does not mean she's the one to put them online. In fact, says her publicist, Elliot Mintz, she doesn't even have a MySpace account.

"Paris did not write it. She does not even have a MySpace account," Mintz said.

You know who does have a MySpace account, though? Britney's ex, Kevin Federline. And you know who's no longer on his list of MySpace friends? J.R. Rotem, the quote-unquote music producer who is supposedly found work as the new Britney boy toy since she split from Kev.

In any event, let the MySpace wars (and impersonations) continue, people. Carry on.

Yesterday, Kevin Federline fans noted that Britney's new man, producer J.R. Rotem, had been removed from Kevin Federline's Top 20 MySpace friends list.

And we know what you're thinking: Come on, Kevin Federline doesn't have any fans.

True. But not the point at the moment. Instead, we're gonna focus on the sad ending to the friendship between K-Fed and Jonathan Rotem. And all over a girl, how tragic.

Granted, it's a pretty hot girl. But we've all seen Britney Spears nude at this point, Kev, are you gonna take all of us off your MySpace list?

This also continues the very mature, effective celebrity trend of airing problems via their online message boards. Travis Barker told Shanna Moakler to shove it via MySpace.

Jason Wahler did the same to Lauren Conrad; and the relationship between Nicole Richie and Rachel Zoe may never be the same after the Internet medium was used and abused.

It's all very sad. Entertaining, hilarious, absurd and sad.

If Travis Barker taught us anything (besides that a low-rent punk rock drummer can marry a Playboy centerfold) it's that when the going gets tough, the tough talk $h!t on MySpace!

Following his lead (and that of Diddy), the sickly Nicole Richie posted a thinly-veiled item on her MySpace blog Monday, accusing a former employee of having an eating disorder.

THG TANGENT: We don't even know how to respond to this. Nicole Richie accusing someone of having an eating disorder is essentially the same as:

1. Michael Richards calling Mel Gibson an intolerant prick
2. Lindsay Lohan calling Paris Hilton a used human condom
3. Anna Nicole Smith stating that Courtney Love has a screw loose
4. Michael Jackson telling Ashlee Simpson that plastic surgery is bad

The bottom line? It takes one to know one. Ring, Ring! Hello? Yes, Nicole? Hi. This is the kettle calling. You're black. Anyway, onto her blog:

Monday, November 27, 2006
X-RAY
BLIND ITEM:
What 35 year old raisin face whispers her order of 3 peices [sic] of asparagus for dinner at Chateau everynight, and hides her deathly disorder by pointing the finger at me, and used her last paycheck I wrote her to pay for a publisist [sic] instead of a nutritionist?
HINT: Her nickname is lettucecup...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wow. Nicole definitely went there, and her skeletal fingers are pointing in the direction of former stylist, Rachel Zoe, without a doubt. Richie just got done firing Zoe's ass earlier this month after two years of service. Zoe (a.k.a. Zoe Mama), is a stick-thin, 35-year-old waif who has been accused of promoting unhealthy body images among her clients.

Really, there's no telling who caused what here. Did Richie become anemic because of Zoe? Did Zoe cater to her because she fits the anemic mould she loves so dearly? What we have here is a chicken-egg scenario, people, and we may never know the answer. But boy, is this recent collection of Nicole Richie pictures heinous or what?

Now THESE are signs of a mature break-up:

First, Shanna Moakler is throwing a "divorce party" at the Bellagio in Las Vegas on Friday. And that's okay - for some, a crazy night in Sin City with hundreds of their closest friends is the way to get over a difficult time in life.

Moakler's ex, Travis Barker, wasn't as sympathetic, however. He happened upon the flyer (pictured) and posted the following gentle soliloquy on his MySpace page:

THIS IS THE SAME WIFE THAT EMAILED ME TO TELL ME SHE WOULD BE SLEEPING WITH HER NEW BOYFRIEND IN MY BED THE DAY OF OUR ANNIVERSARY 2 DAYS AGO SO THIS DOESN'T COME AS A SHOCK. AND THE SAME PERSON WHO IS MAKING "I LOVE SHANNA" SHIRTS FOR PEOPLE TO BUY, IN SUPPORT OF ALL THIS AND PLAYING THE VICTIM, IT SADDENS ME PEOPLE AND EVEN BRINGS ON THE URGE TO PUKE, HOPE IT DOES YOU AS WELL.

IM GONNA SAY A LONG PRAYER FOR HER, SHE NEEDS IT. THERE ISN'T A PART OF SHANNA AND I AND THE FACT OUR MARRIAGE FAILED THAT I COULD BE CELEBRATING OR HAPPY ABOUT EVEN AFTER ALL OF THIS TIME IT WAS OUR FAMILY…IT WAS ALL WE HAD……I MEAN A PARTY??? WHAT DOESN'T KILL ME MAKES ME STRONGER:)

HOPE SHANNA'S PARTY IS EVERYTHING SHE COULD HOPE 4.

We wonder which is worse: the fact that Barker has often thrusted his tongue down the throat of Paris Hilton (also pictured)? Or the fact that he replaced the word "for" with the number "4" in this post?

Either way, we hope these kids find peace and happiness. And it could be worse - Barker could have possibly gotten Karrine Steffans pregnant immediately following the divorce.

Want the inside scoop on the breakup between Laguna Beach alumni Lauren Conrad and boyfriend Jason Wahler? You know, the one that happened sometime after the season finale of The Hills, but that wasn't shown on TV?

Well, who better to deliver the news, albeit in disjointed, convoluted fashion, than Jason himself. On his myspace blog, he details the rumors... the turmoil... the drama... the anguish... *sniff*

Frankly, MTV bad boy Jason (right) always struck the editors at T.H. Gossip as a bit of a drama queen, not a very good boyfriend to Lauren, and a self-centered meathead. With circa 1996 frosted hair. But that's just us, and beside the point.

Here's excerpts from his blog, if you want to know Jason's take on LC, their breakup, and life in general. If there's one thing we learned from it, it's that being rich does not necessarily guarantee you a good education in this country. And that just because you write many paragraphs about something does not mean they contain anything useful. Note that below is the abridged version...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Alright so in the past week I've recieved [sic] tons of comments and emails saying things basically referring to Lauren & Mine's [sic] relationship. First and foremost its obviously non [sic] of your business, But theres been scandals/reports of people saying different things of why we broke up and so on....

... Let me first begin this by saying Lauren and I are not together anymore. The media has gotten the biggest kick out of it and so on. And as they seem to call it 'funny' I dont think its very funny myself... Their [sic] saying I went phycho [sic] and she broke it off with me, I was flirting with girls and so on... The next paragraph will explain the true and honest story.

... Starting around Mid/Late July after we got back from our trip, we just constantly started arguing. I'd call her and she'd be busy and couldn't talk, so she'd call me later and I didn't have time to talk. And that basically went on for about a week. Then when we finally found the time to be around each other, things just seemed to slowly drift apart.

... It's not that we didnt wanna be around each other, we just simply had nothing really to say. So withen [sic] the next week we hung out a couple times and every time we hung out it just got further and further apart to the part where it just looked like we didnt even know each other. So I basically went up to Laguna for the weekend and when I came back to Los Angeles things have just compleetly [sic] changed.

... Then all it took was me to say "so is this the end" and thats when the downpour came. We constantly fought and argued for about a week, until we just decided that we couldnt be together anymore, and our relationship just wasnt working. I was out at clubs partying, and she was doing the same and our trust for each other faded. Either way you put the relationship, it wasn't my fault, and it wasn't her fault. It just happened that way, and I'm sorry that it had too but it was the best for both of us.

... To be honest and truthfull [sic] saying goodbye to a relationship that had lasted to long with a person that I cared so much for, hurt more than anything. I would have given it all to make it work, but I put my best effort foreward [sic] and so did she and sometimes things just don't always work out the way you plan for them too.

... The only thing you can do is save their memories, keep them in your heart, and move on with your life. Which is exactly what I'm going to do. No matter what happens in life I'll always wish Lauren the best and I really hope she finds 'the one' I'm just sorry I wasnt it.

... As far as the future looks as of right now, there really isn't much of a chance for use to be together again. We're both moving foreward [sic], and hoping for the best. As of right now were just 'friends' were not good friends and were not enemys [sic].

... We dont ignore each other, but yet again we dont go out of our way to hang out. I still love her more than anything, she was my first true love. I wish her nothing but hapiness and success in life and her career.

... Maybey [sic] after the reading of this you will see me more than just 'laguna beaches [sic] bad boy' ... or at least id [sic] hope so."