Michele Bachmann

Republican Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann formally ended her campaign for the White House this morning, just one day after Mitt Romney's Iowa caucus victory.

"Last night, the people of Iowa spoke with a very clear voice. And I have decided to stand aside," the GOP Congresswoman from Minnesota told reporters today.

They spoke, indeed, dealing her a disappointing sixth-place finish.

The Queen of Rage could not become The Queen of Votes.

Despite Bachmann's extensive tour to visit all 99 of Iowa's counties, her August straw poll win, and the state being her place of birth, she garnered just five percent.

Her communications director Alice Stewart told reporters following the news conference that conversations began last night about whether to continue the campaign.

The congresswoman asked for time to "sleep on it" and "pray about it." Stewart said she was awoken early Wednesday morning with the news that Michele was out.

Bachmann has not yet discussed whether she will seek reelection to her U.S. House seat in Minnesota, Stewart said, or whether she will endorse another candidate.

Also unclear if last night's second-place finisher will reach out to her supporters with the following tagline: Rick Santorum: Conservative Like Bachmann, But Less Crazy!

Michele Bachmann is railing against Ron Paul and Kent Sorenson, who left his post as head of her Iowa campaign effort to go work for her rival instead.

Presidential hopeful Bachmann implied that Paul, who is running much stronger in Iowa, bought off her key staffer a week before the state's caucuses.

"Kent Sorenson personally told me he was offered a large sum of money to go to work for the Paul campaign," Bachmann said in a statement to Fox News.

GOP Debate: Paul vs. Bachmann

"Kent campaigned with us earlier this afternoon and went immediately afterward to a Ron Paul event and announced he is changing teams."

"Kent said to me yesterday that 'everyone sells out in Iowa, why shouldn't I?' then he told me he would stay with our campaign," Bachmann added.

"The Ron Paul campaign has to answer for its actions."

In response, Paul's campaign said Bachmann's Iowa political director "unequivocally stated Kent Sorenson's decision was in no way financially motivated."

Sorenson attributed his decision to Paul's higher standing in polls, where he is battling Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum for the top spot.

Jesse Benton, Paul's national campaign chairman, welcomed the endorsement from Sorenson, himself an Iowa State Senator, before the Jan. 3 vote:

"Congressman Paul is delighted to accept the endorsement of Senator Kent Sorenson, whose blessing and assistance carry a great deal [of] weight."

"He doesn't take this decision lightly, which says a lot about the senator and Ron Paul." He also picked up an endorsement from Kelly Clarkson this week.

Can he pull off a masterstroke and upset the field next week? Stay tuned.

Ron Paul: The Big Dog!

Former SNL cast member Victoria Jackson is never one to hide her staunchly conservative political views. Her latest rant surrounds Muslim infiltration of the U.S.

Jackson, on her web talk show this week, claimed the United States is being overtaken by radical Muslims bent on bringing the nation under Sharia law.

Seriously. Citing insider knowledge, she said the following:

"I just went to a briefing in Washington DC, across the street from the Capitol, at the Longworth building at 8:30 am two days ago and it changed my life."

"For six hours, I saw pictures and names and dates and facts and Islamic law books and Korans, Surahs for six hours and they proved to me that the Muslim Brotherhood has infiltrated our highest positions in government and this is serious."

"Michele Bachmann and Rick Santorum are the only GOP candidates to acknowledge the above facts and warn against the present threat of Islamic Law replacing the U.S. Constitution. Very few people in America are informed and educated as I am."

There you have it folks. "Few people are as informed and educated" as Victoria Jackson.

Perhaps she means that ironically, as in she is so ridiculously misinformed, paranoid and uneducated that few people could ever stoop to her level.

Eh, probably not. She also thinks Glee makes kids gay. But we need to subscribe to her Podcast for the unintentional comedy factor alone.

Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney lead the polls, and Rick Perry may generate the best sound bites ("best" as in most entertaining, if not intelligent), but Ron Paul proved at last night's Republican debate that he's still a force to be reckoned with.

Never one to bend to party orthodoxy, Paul took issue with rival Michele Bachmann's stance toward Iran and its nuclear program, advocating anti-engagement policies that make the Texas Congressman an anathema to many in the GOP, yet wildly popular with others. 

Watch the heated exchange below:

GOP Debate: Paul vs. Bachmann

Donald Trump will moderate a debate between Republican Presidential hopefuls on December 27. There's just one problem:

Only Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum are currently scheduled to show up.

With Mitt Romney, Ron Paul and Jon Huntsman having already turned down the invitation, Michelle Bachmann and Rick Perry added their negative RSVPs this week, prompting The Donald to say these candidates are "scared" and that he may need to run against them after all.

"The Republicans are afraid of me running as an Independent," Trump tells TMZ. They’re all afraid. The only person NOT afraid is Newt... There are two reasons that these candidates are backing out of my debate. One, some just aren’t courageous people. Two, some are concerned that I may run as an Independent. They want me to give up ... and I’m NOT giving up."

We're not so sure, Don. Have you seen this Rick Perry ad?!? Say what you want about the man, but he isn't afraid to look like a moronic homophobe.

Trump for President?

GOP Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann will not be her party's nominee.

Sorry, hardcore believers out there. It's not personal, it's just not happening. But why let that stop her from speculating on who she'd pick as her Vice President in 2012?

"I have just the highest respect for Rick Santorum. He's a very sharp guy, and I could easily see making him attorney general," Bachmann tells the Des Moines Register.

Another name on the Minnesota Congresswoman's short list: The Donald!

Who are three Republicans who will not be the next President?

"We've got a lot of wonderful candidates who would fit that bill. Easily comes to mind I think would be Jim DeMint of South Carolina. Marco Rubio of Florida," she told CNN.

"There's a lot of great people out there. And Donald Trump is someone that I think a lot of people would be intrigued with, too," added Bachmann, hilariously.

Trump, of course, toyed with the idea of running for U.S. President himself this year, then backed down, implying he could've won if he tried, but wasn't up for it.

He's the best.

Jimmy Fallon, the host of NBC's Late Night, issued an apology to GOP Presidential hopeful Michele Bachmann over a song played during her visit to the program.

"I'm honored that @MicheleBachmann was on our show and I'm so sorry about the intro mess. I really hope she comes back," a Tweet from Fallon's account said.

As Bachmann strode on to the stage, the program's band, led by Ahmir "Questlove" Thompson, played a snippet of a 1985 Fishbone song called ... "Lyin' Ass Bitch."

The tune starts with a distinctive "la la la la la la la la la" refrain, the only words that were audible before a smiling, waving Bachmann sat down for her interview.

The song itself, which is about a relationship gone wrong, isn't political, and it's not clear if it was even selected with the Minnesota Congresswoman in mind.

In any case, it repeats the refrain "Lyin' Ass Bitch" about a dozen times, and a lot of people weren't happy. Michele's campaign had no immediate comment.

He may never win an election, but thanks to his 9-9-9 tax plan, Herman Cain was the clear winner of last night's Republican Presidential Debate in New Hampshire.

If you believe any publicity is good publicity, the Georgia businessman is sitting pretty after his idea to overhaul the U.S. tax system got everybody's attention.

The 9-9-9 plan plugged by Cain every nine seconds is not, as John Huntsman suggested, the price of pizza (a good line, seeing as Cain was once CEO of Godfather's).

If Herman Cain were president, he'd abolish the IRS in favor of flat nine percent sales, business and income taxes. Logistically impossible? Perhaps, but man, so catchy!

Mitt Romney politely praised it while calling it too simplistic, but the best - and arguably most inappropriate, from a professed Christian - zinger came from Michele Bachmann.

Watch her assessment of Herman Cain's 9-9-9 plan below:

Michele Bachmann on Herman Cain 9-9-9 Plan

Herman Cain:

Michelle Bachmann:

Minnesota Congresswoman and GOP Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann was apparently quoted as saying that essentially, last week's earthquake and this past weekend's Hurricane Irene were messages from God.

God's point: Federal deficits are totally out of control!

Bachmann told Floridians Sunday that Irene and the quake felt along much of the East Coast last week were messages from God to warn "politicians" to start heeding divine guidance ... via small government conservatives, obvi.

"I don't know how much God has to do to get the attention of the politicians. We've had an earthquake; we've had a hurricane. He said, 'Are you going to start listening to me here?'" Bachmann told a crowd in Sarasota, Fla.

"Listen to the American people, because the American people are roaring. They know government is on a morbid obesity diet and we've got to rein in spending."

Kathy Griffin has been a recurring thorn in the side of the Palins, so it's no surprise that GOP presidential candidate Michele Bachmann is in her sights now.

Appearing on Conan this week, the comedian recalled meeting the Congresswoman in D.C. while researching for her rally to repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell.

How did that run-in go? Listen to Kathy describe it:

Kathy Griffin on Michele Bachmann

Perhaps mistaking Griffin for someone else, or simply not recognizing her, a Michele Bachmann staff member began filming their interaction for her website.

First, Griffin says she asked the Minnesotan if she'd support an effort to repeal the law that banned homosexuals from serving openly in the military.

Bachmann declined, so Griffin got personal: "Congresswoman Bachmann, were you born a bigot or did you, like, grow into it?" she asked, to her face.

Her answer? "That's a good question. I'm gonna have to get back to ya."

Now that would be a great presidential campaign slogan right there.