'Tis the season for letters to Santa and Christmas wish lists. Where some kids are minimalists in their approach to the holidays, others throw absolutely everything at the wall.
Hey, you never know. Any or all of it could stick.
One of those kids was Drew Magary's daughter, who asked for everything from American Girl dolls to 5 North Face jackets to "a little thing that can turn into anything at any time."
And $1,000, of course. Cash.
Magary writes, "A child could go on a five-state killing spree and no parent would be heartless enough to actually bail on Christmas presents."
"The nice list has worse grade inflation than Harvard."
To illustrate his point, and to reveal what his daughter might find under the tree on Christmas morning, Magary decided to annotate his daughter's list item by item.
In turn, he discusses with the world all the things she will definitely not be getting when the big guy slides down their chimney on Christmas Eve.
Or when he braves the nearest shopping mall and has to decide whether or not to tase the person in front of him in line at Justice. (Probably don't do that, Drew.)