Jon Stewart
Gossip

The New York Mets fell short of the World Series by a hair last week, bowing out of the National League playoffs after a nail-biting defeat at the hands of St. Louis. One of their supporters, Daily Show host Jon Stewart, was on hand to give them everything he could. But alas, it was not enough. Much like T.H. Gossip's efforts to get Nicole Richie into rehab, sometimes no matter how hard you try, it's out of your control.

Stewart himself recently bowed out of the 2008 Presidential race, much to the dismay of millions who want him on a ticket with Stephen Colbert. Tell me those two guys couldn't beat some of the chumps thinking of running! Sigh.

On the bright side, there's no way Ashlee Simpson can run. You have to be 35, according to the U.S. Constitution, and she's not even close (nor would even the dumbest of Americans vote for her... at least we hope that's the case)!

We can't tell you for sure who will be on the presidential ballot in 2008. But the list of those who've had to annouce they are NOT running reads like the Hollywood Walk of Fame:

- Oprah is out. And her lawyer got pretty steamed anyone dared to mention she could be in.

- George Clooney isn't up for running. But he is still single, ladies.

- Brooke Hogan also won't be a candidate. Obviously. She's not old enough yet, according to the Constitution.

Now, you can add Jon Stewart (left) and Stephen Colbert to the parade of non-presidents.

Stewart, responding to the influx of T-shirts promoting such a ticket said it's "a real sign of how sad people are" with the state of affairs in the country.

"Nothing says 'I am ashamed of you my government' more than Stewart/Colbert '08," Stewart told an audience Sunday at the New Yorker Festival.

Stewart, who recently hosted Pakistan's president, Gen. Pervez Musharraf, on The Daily Show, said he's been trying to get top Bush administration officials to appear. "We have requests in there to everyone including Barney," Stewart said. "Only Barney replies."

Barney is the president's Scottish terrier.

Stewart scoffed at suggestions that some people actually get their news from The Daily Show, too.

"There's no way you could get the news from us," he said. "I've seen the show. It couldn't happen."

Anyone wanna take a road trip to the midwest in November? Fans of The Daily Show shouldn't shake their heads quiet yet.

According to the New York Post, Jon Stewart will take his political satire to the swing-state of Ohio for the entire week preceding this year's midterm elections. The news spoof will be retitled Battlefield Ohio: The Daily Show's Midwest Midterm Midtacular for its entire string of broadcasts from a theater at Ohio State University.

When asked where Ohio was, Paris Hilton mumbled something about Tony Blair and then stuck pins into her voodoo doll of Lindsay Lohan.

Meanwhile, rumors that The Daily Show will also visit Laguna Beach and mock the entire cast are false.