The cast of Jersey Shore is being sued, collectively, for assault by a woman who claims she was assaulted by the guidos' and guidettes' security guards.

The claimant, filing suit using initials J.P., says four security guards employed by the show threw her to the ground after a heated argument with Snooki.

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"I'm definitely not a saint. If I walked into a church, I'd probably burst into flames to be honest with you ... But I think that I can probably talk my way out of the hole I dug. I mean, how deep is a grave?" - Ronnie Magro

The great thing about this line, one of many great Jersey Shore quotes from last night's episode, is that Ron probably really believed it. Sammi is that pathetic.

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The rest of us have known about it for weeks, but Jersey Shore star Sammi "Sweetheart" Giancola reportedly left the show late last week after watching some early Season Two episodes that reveal Ronnie Magro creepin' on random hoes.

As we've seen pretty much all season so far, Ron has been getting absolutely rip$h!t drunk, mauling any grenade or land mine in sight, then crawling back in bed with Sammi. It's an ugly situation. He's extremely dirty and she's pretty naive.

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