Janice Dickinson
Gossip

Janice Dickinson, the self-proclaimed original supermodel, has never been one to refrain from speaking her mind. Especially when provoked by paparazzi.

Plenty of stars have earned headlines for getting violent with members of the celebrity gossip media, but the Mesozoic model goes ape$h!t like no other.

Circled by vultures and berated as a “great distraction,” the reality TV mainstay went on a profane tirade whilst beating a cameraman with her scarf.

Despite visible intoxication outside Nobu, Janice Dickinson actually got in her car to drive away. Thankfully, when she went to chase another photographer, her friend got behind the wheel as Dickinson screamed “I’m totally f*%ked up!”

Then they drove off. That's it. Check out this epic meltdown below:

Considering how incredibly ugly she is, Janice Dickinson should keep her opinions about others to herself.

On The Today Show this morning, the former model did at least stand up for Jennifer Love Hewitt in light of her recent bikini picture controversy.

We'd love to see Tyra Banks nude. Janice Dickinson naked? Not so much. Case closed.

But Janice Dickinson then lived up to the first syllable of her last name by taking the conversation a step further and comparing Hewitt to Tyra Banks.

"These are unflattering camera angles on her," Janice said about the fiancee or Ross McCall. "You want to see someone who's fat? I'm sorry, Tyra. Tyra Banks is fat. This girl is not fat."

Al Roker tried to come to Banks' defense, and Dickinson tried to backtrack by saying, "I'm kidding because I love Miss Banks," but we're not buying it.

Janice Dickinson is such a dog, we're shocked Michael Vick didn't try to fight her.

Janice Dickinson is a fossil. And an outspoken fan of plastic surgery.

And she has some new work she is planning on taking public real soon.

The self-proclaimed "world's first supermodel," underwent a tummy tuck and "mini neck lift" Monday in Beverly Hills. The surgeon: Dr. Frank Ryan, plastic surgeon to the stars who famously did Heidi Montag's boob job.

Hey, you go to the best with this stuff. The star of The Hills has a nice fake rack, too, so we assume this means good things for Janice Dickinson's new... neck.

A source tells Us Weekly that while "Janice knows people think she didn't need a tummy tuck," she's been complaining about "lots of extra skin" (ew) on her lower abdomen and wanted tighter abs. Don't we all.

The source adds that she opted for the mini neck lift as an after thought because "she might as well since she was going under." Naturally.

According to the source, Dickinson, a former America's Next Top Model judge and current star of Oxygen Network's Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency, is now resting at the Serenity after-care center in Santa Monica.

Just prior to having a facelift in 2004, Janice Dickinson explained the appeal of plastic surgery to Entertainment Tonight:

"I consider plastic surgery important because I'm in front of the camera, I still model, and, quite frankly, I was noticing my skin looking like a turkey wobbler. I'm just trying to hang on to what I got."

Yep. Ashlee Simpson surely concurs. This just makes the prospect of Janice Dickinson nude and campaigning for PETA all the more enticing.

At least we don't have to see Janice Dickinson naked in the photo below.

But we do need to put up with more nonsense from people who think getting naked in the name of animal protection is the best way to spend their time. (No offense, Holly Madison nude. You're the exception.)

Other celebrities that have contributed to this fight include Pamela Anderson and Famke Janssen. But we're most bothered by Dickinson and the underwear-clad male models seen here, rallying on behalf of PETA's "We'd Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur" campaign.

Aren't there better causes to protest? Like the Iraq war, where actual human beings are dying? Or Michael Vick and dogfighting, if they wish to remain topical?

Phew. We can focus our eye balls on the Mary-Louise Parker nude billboard behind these idiots campaigning on behalf of PETA.

"By showing some of our skin, we hope to help save animals' skins," the crazy, former model said.

Give Dickinson credit on that: if she ever threatened to take it all off, we probably would give in to all demands. No horny cops will be asking for nude photos of her any time soon.

In the end, we're not anti-animals by any means. We just have our priorities straight. Let's focus on people living in poverty and Britney Spears receiving professional help before we care about the occasional minx being killed.

Thank goodness for underwear.

Otherwise, the photo below would give us a Janice Dickinson crotch shot that would rival anything Britney Spears or Paris Hilton has ever poisoned our eyes with.

We have no idea who the old dude alongside this former model is, but he looks less than enthused to be holding hands with an insane Dickinson as she frolics way too freely. Even Tila Tequila wears more clothing than this. Occasionally.

Call us crazy, but in a match-up of elder super models, we'll take Heidi Klum nude over Janice Dickinson nude any day.

Janice Dickinson is ugly and insane.

This is far from newsworthy. It's like reporting that Paula Abdul enjoys pain medication.

But the fact that Dickinson recently admitted to playing a role in her abusive father's death? Okay, now you have our attention.

'When my father was having a heart attack, I threw his heart pills out of the ambulance window," the crazy model told Reveal magazine in an interview. "I killed him, but I have no regrets. It doesn't feel good, but I'd do it all over again."

Strong words. We wonder if they'll lead to Janice joining Paris Hilton in prison.

If so, she'll miss out on having lots of sex with famous people. Dickinson claims she's had over 1,000 lovers, among them Jack Nicholson and Warren Beatty, each of whom thought they were the best.

"They all think they're so special but I was like: "You're not unique, I'm going to go and date the other Academy Award winner!" Dickinson proudly said. "My mantelpiece used to be lined with Academy Awards I nicked from the stars I'd slept with; I gave them back eventually.'

Somewhere - rehab, probably - Lindsay Lohan is getting pissed that someone else is acting sluttier than she is.

Meanwhile, despite the fact that she has intercourse with boyfriend Joe Caplin "until the cows come home," Janice says there's a famous Brit she'd like to shag:

"I'd f**k Simon Cowell in a heartbeat. And I think his girlfriend's pretty cute - I'd f**k her, too."

It's nice to see this woman isn't at all desperate for attention, isn't it? Especially as she ends the interview by talking about Pete Doherty's penis for some reason. Kate Moss might wanna watch out.

"I wouldn't judge Pete Doherty by his looks, he might have a 12 foot penis!' Dickinson said without any prompting at all.

Last year, we were all about the crotch shot queens. Also known as the ho train.

Also, this Katie Holmes crotch shot would have been cool... if we didn't get negged.

This one below, however? We would just as soon have passed, but we don't have a choice in this line of work, so we bring it to you anyway. Sorry.

After dining at hotspot eatery, Koi, on Tuesday, the "original" supermodel and one-time America's Next Top Model judge proved to be anything but...

Coy. Get it? Whatevs. Anyway, Janice Dickinson flashed her business to photographers as she entered a car, and we've got a picture of it. If you want to look.

PHOTO CREDIT: Pacific Coast News / LOGO CREDIT: The Hollywood Gossip

The 52-year-old mother of two, who loves the Kama Sutra, offers a gross glimpse into her nether region... which we've covered up, fortunately for you. For us, the damage is done.

We recommend Janice have that thing looked at. Maybe Dr. Sandeep Kapoor is available to perform an examination. Or at least Travis Barker.

Lauren Conrad.

Janice Dickinson.

Not two celebrities you'd expect to see in the same post. But it's Valentine's Day, so anything's possible.

T.H. Gossip has learned that the star of The Hills and the self-proclaimed world's first supermodel have both been hit with Cupid's arrow!

So to speak.

Both LC (who's admittedly bad at dating) and Janice (who gets rammed from time to time) have fallen head over heels for the latest in Kama Sutra's romantic kits for "making love better."

TMZ tells us that Lauren Conrad recently stocked up on a bunch of the Strawberry Oil of Love and proclaimed, "I love it, it's my favorite!"

Brody Jenner could be in for a treat tonight.

The oils are water based and gently warm the skin. In other words, hotter than a Laguna Beach sunburn for the cutie, who recently celebrated her 21st birthday!

Meanwhile, Janice Dickinson, who turns 55 on Thursday, can't get enough of the Strawberry Creme body souffles, which are perfect for giving that special someone a sensual massge.

While on her latest sexy shopping spree, Dickinson unabashedly shrieked:

"I f**king love Kama Sutra!"

There's not a whole lot else we can add to that.

But hey, at least Katie Rees has some people to go to for pointers if she ever wants to experiment.

They're both old, may have been hot back in the day at some point (we can't say for sure, one way or the other) and are quite possibly insane. What's more, they are both washed-up hacks who can't seem to stay out of the limelight, even when they're not actually doing anything. One of them can't keep her mouth shut. The other can't even keep the lights on!

Yeah. They're real normal. T.H. Gossip is proud present to you, this totally terrifying train-wreck twosome: Anna Nicole Smith and Janice Dickinson.

 

Dear God, that is frightening. Coming Soon: T.H. Gossip's Alcohol-Drug Rehab Edition of Photo Finish, featuring the lovely likes of Lindsay Lohan and Nicole Richie.

Janice Dickinson, the outrageous model who not only claims to have coined the term "supermodel," but to be the first one, was nailed last night.

By a car. What we're saying is, Janice Dickinson was involved in a hit and run car accident in L.A. late Tuesday.

According to a statement issued by her rep, Dickinson, an assistant, her makeup artist and stylist were on the 405 Freeway when an unknown driver in a semi-truck sideswiped their vehicle into a median and sped away. Police say that contrary to popular belief, Nicole Richie was not driving.

The outspoken old hag, who has bashed Britney Spears and others of late, was wearing a seat belt at the time, thankfully. She was thrown head first into the windshield and suffered a concussion, but it could have been a lot worse.

The group, including the assistant who was driving the vehicle, was taken to the hospital, where they were treated and released. Her rep says that although Janice is shaken, she was given a clean bill of health and is expected to be "back in fine form" for the debut of Season 2 of The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency on January 10.

Wait, there's a Janice Dickinson reality show? Wow. And we thought America's Next Top Model was lame. No offense, CariDee English.