by Hilton Hater at . Comments

It was Thanksgiving in Quahog on Family Guy Season 13 Episode 5, though Brian and Peter were in more of a hungry mood than a gracious mood. They got drunk and devoured the entire turkey the night before the big meal.

Lois, naturally, was displeased with this development. She sent her husband and dog away to track down a replacement.

However, every supermarket within 60-mile radius was sold out.

They do finally track down a turkey far outside of town, with Peter trying to dunk it in a basketball court. So Brian takes control of the bird and tells Peter to drive home. Except he can’t operate a Hybrid and they crash into a lake.

With Peter still not home, Stewie talks Chris into stepping up as man of the house. He tries to play host and ends up giving the greatest Thanksgiving speech in recorded history (“Yesterday I’m microwaving a cat and today I’m giving a speech!”).

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Dreams really did come true on Family Guy Season 13 Episode 4.

But only after Brian realized the nightmare of being Peter Griffin’s dog, as his owner tied a piece of rope to Brian’s rope and drove off, a scene that ended with Brian’s face smashing into a fire hydrant.

And which prompted the dog to undergo some cosmetic surgery. 

This led to an amazing "clears eyes, giant teeth, can't lose" line (Friday Night Lights forever!), along with a newly-confident Brian flirting with Starbucks barista and the birds smiling back at Brian.

It was as if now has a smile fit for a real estate agent. Hey... wait a minute! Brian should be a real estate agent!!!

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Sorry, Peter Griffin. But you are no Walter White.

On Family Guy Season 13 Episode 3, the patriarch of this animated smash tried to get his Heisenberg on, as Lois started a blood drive in Quahog after learning of an earthquake in Haiti.

At the event, she talked Peter into giving blood by promising him a homemade cookie afterward. Pretty simple, right?

But it got far more complicated after Peter said his wife’s dessert was “even tastier than Connie Britton’s hair.”

Perhaps they should open a bakery, Peter suggests, an idea Lois believes sound romantic. The family quickly earns a loan because the bank employee is Cookie Monster. Naturally.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Following an epic crossover with The Simpsons last Sunday, Family Guy Season 13 Episode 2 kept its focus squarely on the citizens of Quahog.

Specifically, on Joe Swanson, as Peter came across his friend’s illustrations of a children’s book called The Hopeful Squirrel and soon learned that the former’s cop’s childhood dream was to be an author.

Impressed and inspired, Peter pushes Joe to publish his book, but not before offering up one key piece of advice:

“My one note on these would be to hide a bunch of dongs in the background.”

So Joe sends the story to Piermont Publishing under the fake name, David Chicago, and it turns into a huge hit. All of a sudden, Joe is invited to do readings at a local book store, yet his awful stage presence scares the kids.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

It was made very clear on Sunday evening:

Television fans chose not to watch TV online, especially not on ABC or Fox.

The Once Upon a Time Season 4 premiere, which brought the world of Frozen into the world of Storybrooke, saw a 31 percent increase in viewership compared to the Season 3 opener:

Overall, 9.4 million households tuned in, while the episode earned a strong 3.4 rating among 18-49-year olds.

Queen Elsa on ABC

Elsewhere, the Family Guy-Simpsons crossover shattered records for this animated hit, as 8.4 million people tuned in to the Season 13 premiere. That's a 73 percent uptick from last September's opener.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

It finally happened, television fans.

Following years of hope and then months of hype, Family Guy Season 13 Episode 1 really did feature Family Guy crossing over with The Simpsons.

Could the special premiere possibly live up to the ridiculously lofty expectations of fans across the world?

Pretty much, yes, even if the meta references grew a bit tired old by hour's end ("It may have been inspired by Duff, but I like to think that it goes in a different direction," Peter said of his favorite beer, clearly also joking about his actual show).

As a recap, however, let's just run down the crossover's most memorably Family Guy quotes, lines and moments, shall we?

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

A woman named Claire Leeson has spent over $30,000 over the past few months to look like Kim Kardashian.

But a stand-up comedian named Robert Franzese has spent about $30,000 less than that figure to sound EXACTLY like Peter Griffin!

Featured at this year's Allentown Comic-Con (yes, there's apparently a Comic-Con in Allentown, Pennsylvania), Franzese nearly sounds more like this Family Guy character than series creator Seth MacFarlane, who voices Peter on the Fox animated hit.

Having also memorized all of the best Family Guy quotes and purchased some green pants and a white shirt, Franzese is a dead ringer for the father of Brian, Meg and Stewie.

Close your eyes. Watch him crack jokes below. And you won't even need to watch Family Guy online to get your Peter Griffin fix:

by Free Britney at . Comments

Family Guy is back, and as awkwardly hilarious as ever. Even by Family Guy standards, Seth MacFarlane and his team outdid themselves this time out.

The crux of Sunday night's Family Guy Season 12 Episode 13 was Peter's mom passing away. This could have been a tragic and emotional experience.

This is Peter Griffin, though, so we saw something different: Him forming a special bond with one of her friends, an older woman, Evelyn voiced by Lauren Bacal.

Eventually, she tries to kiss Peter in a turn of events that could not be more uncomfortable or funny at the same time. In other words, it was vintage Family Guy.

The events did take a toll on Stewie, however, as the young one grew distraught at the inevitability of death (Brian "dying" earlier this season notwithstanding).

Want to see it for yourself? Just watch Family Guy online at TV Fanatic now!

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Brian is alive and well on Family Guy. So all problems for the Griffins are in the past, right?

Not exactly. Peter ran into a pretty big problem on Family Guy Season 12 Episode 9. A pretty big personal problem, that is.

The patriarch couldn't perform behind closed doors. Or, as he put it at one point, his "hog" could not "partake in the slop this evening" when it came to action between the sheets with Lois.

So what did Peter do? He turned to Quagmire and Joe for assistance. And they eventually helped Peter get his job back, which helped him get his mojo back.

Where did he and Lois end up doing it? Watch Family Guy online now for the answer:

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

In a word? OOPS!

Following the apparent death of Brian on Family Guy a few weeks ago, one dedicated nut job fan mourned the late canine in the only way he saw appropriate: via a tattoo of the dog along with the simple letters "RIP."

Of course, there's just one problem: Brian was resurrected on Family Guy Season 12 Episode 8, which aired this past Sunday and which featured Stewie going back in time to bring back his deceased pal.

Hmmm... we can think of one other person who wishes he had a time machine right about now.

Family Guy Tattoo

Note to this dude: you can watch Family Guy online at TV Fanatic and laugh your way through the tears of this tattoo decision.

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