Ali Lohan is desperate to be famous.

We wonder if she’ll settle for being a troll.

According to E! Online, the reality star and sister of Lindsay Lohan is director John Carl Buechler’s top choice for a lead role in the big-budget remake of his 1986 film, Troll.

Ali auditioned last week for the role of the young Eunice St. Clair.

“She was great,” Buechler somehow said. “The camera loves her. She’s a really good actress… I am personally going to fight for her.”

Ali Lohan craves fame. Her mother has raised her well.

The “retelling of the original story with some twists” (as the director describes it) does not currently have a release date. The original marked the big screen debut of Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

If the hiring of Lohan goes through, the remake would mark the debut of Ali on screen, as well. Until her eventual sex tape, that is.

With her reality show premiering this month, Ali Lohan wants you to know one thing: it’s tough being her. Please read about it in People Magazine. Please shower her with pity.

Oh, and make sure you watch Living Lohan on Memorial Day.

As a way of hyping her new series, Ali opened up to People about the trouble she’s faced in school. It’s horrible, folks.

“A little while ago … a couple of girls in school made up a video of me and put it up on YouTube,” Ali said. “They used disgusting words. Like if my mom ever heard me say that stuff, I’d be grounded for life! … They’re disgusting kids. I got really aggravated.”

Right. Because Dina Lohan has probably never heard such ugly words. Heck, she probably get called worse every day on the street.

Ali Lohan wants your sympathy and your eye balls tuned to Living Lohan.

So, did Ali learn anything from the harrowing experience? How does her current home schooling situation differ from being stuck in a classroom with - gasp! - non-celebrities?

“You learn so much more – it’s just hard to focus when girls are giving you problems,” she said. “No one’s talking about you behind your back. It’s definitely easier.”

Thanks, as always, to People magazine for assembling these terrific sound bites from the entertaining world of celebrity quotes …

“Do I look like I had 10 cheeseburgers or something?”
- The possibly pregnant, publicity-seeking media whore Ashlee Simpson, in response to Ellen DeGeneres asking if she’s knocked up

“It’s the Easter bunny.”
- Minnie Driver, when asked who her unborn baby’s father is

“This last pregnancy rumor really made me want to go back to the gym. I just didn’t like the picture. I thought, ‘You know what? My stomach is sticking out there! Let me get on the treadmill and do some sit-ups.’”
- Fergie

“I grew up watching Lindsay. It made me want to do what she does.”
- Skank-in-training Ali Lohan

“I’m thrilled to be anywhere with high ratings these days.”
- President Bush, appearing via satellite on Deal or No Deal

“I wore no underwear for you and look where it got me!”
- Kate Beckinsale (not Britney Spears), reneging on her “surprise” for Late Late Show host Craig Ferguson, after he made a crack about her age

“We played laser tag - it was really cool.”
- Paris Hilton, on her “anniversary” with Benji Madden

“I’m content with 90 percent of me. I like my teeth. Sometimes I wonder if my orthodontist realizes how important he was.”
- Carrie Underwood

“That was better than good sex!”
- Dancing with the Stars judge Carrie Ann Inaba, congratulating Mario and Karina

Granted, Ali Lohan is mostly destined to follow in her dysfunctional sister and mother’s fame-loving footsteps.

But, for the sake of her new movie, let’s also refer to her as “ghostly.”

Indeed, Reel Movie News is reporting that Lindsay’s 14-year-old sister, has begun filming her big screen debut, Mostly Ghostly.

In the movie, which centers on an 11-year-old boy who befriends two ghosts, Ali Lohan will portray a popular high school senior.

In real life, she’ll portray the sister of an alcoholic sex kitten and daughter of a mother who cares more about celebrity gossip attention than her children.

Excuse us while we vomit…

Okay, we’re back and ready to announce that the name of Ali and Dina Lohan’s summer reality show will be Living Lohan.

While we were hoping this series would be based around the mother and daughter dealing with different incapacitating illnesses every week, it looks like the show will focus on Dina once again pimping out a daughter instead.

“Viewers will go inside the Lohan’s Long Island home for the first time to follow Dina as she works double duty as mom and manager to help Ali try to follow in her big sister [Lindsay’s] famous footsteps,” a press release for the show says.

Cameras will also follow the duo to Vegas as Ali Lohan becomes the latest untalented celebrity to record an album.

“Dina is determined to help each of her four kids fulfill their dreams and refuses to live in fear of what others may think, despite being under the paparazzi microscope,” the press release adds.

We’d write more, but we’re too in awe of how incredible a mother Dina Lohan is.

The Hollywood Gossip staff gives Ali Lohan seven months until her first DUI. Maybe a year until her first threesome.

With the younger sister of Lindsay Lohan making it no secret that she’s addicted to fame and fortune in a recent interview with Teen Vogue, the future is far from bright for this hopeful celebrity.

Here’s a recap her Ali’s interview with the magazine:

On her new reality TV show: “It’s not all that fake stuff. It’s just what we do in our everyday life.”

On her role model big sister: “I grew up watching Lindsay and it made me want to do what she does. Just the whole vibe. Being there, being on camera, or onstage, with everybody listening to you… it’s so cool when people look up to you. I’ve already been asked for my autograph and it’s just a really good feeling to have.”

Ali Lohan, seen here with her role model of a sister, can’t wait to make entertainment news headlines.

On how she really wants to become an actress, singer and fashion designer: “Really bad, so bad. So bad you don’t even know. And now, it’s actually happening.”

Hooray! Soon enough, STD tests and horrific movie reviews for your work will also be happening, Ali.

Will Ali Lohan soon be moving in on Zac Efron?

Don’t worry, Vanessa Hudgens fans, we’re solely talking about the fictional realm of High School Musical 3.

According to Marc Malkin of E! News, the younger sister of Lindsay Lohan might play a role in the third installment of the wildly popular High School Musical franchise.

All we know at the moment is that Ali would portray a spoiled student in the mold of Sharpay (Ashley Tisdale). Her rep confirmed almost as much, saying: “She is auditioning for it.”

So, what do you think? Would Ali Lohan make a good addition to the cast of High School Musical?

This can’t be good: Ali Lohan is following in the footsteps of older, troubled, skanky sister Lindsay Lohan. Literally.

It may seem innocent enough now, but just wait until Ali has had a few drinks and then gets into a car. Or every other guy who can stand upright gets into her.

You play with a Firecrotch, Ali, and you get burned…

It’s always nice to have a positive role model.

Lindsay Lohan and little sister Ali Lohan sported matching spandex pants while out and about together in New York City on Wednesday. Man, they’re so hot.

Oh wait, no they’re not. If it weren’t for Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan would be the biggest wreck in Hollywood, easy. And Ali Lohan? She’s 14! Just so wrong.

We’re not above ogling Hayden Panettiere … but 14? If you’re 14, you just should not be wearing spandex pants. Especially with no underwear. Look closely and you’ll see there is serious Ali Lohan camel toe action going on in the pic below…

Lindsay Lohan has taught younger sister Ali Lohan well.

Yesterday, we talked about Sophie Price and how she is trying to emulate her big sis, Jordan. Must be little sisters wanting to skank it up like older siblings week.

This is just sad.

Only 13, Ali Lohan is being forced to enter the celebrity news headlines because her slutty, alcoholic sister can’t keep her pants on or her foot off the pedal.

The sister of Lindsay and daughter of Dina and Michael recently wrote in to VH1 in defense of her mother.

Here’s what Ali Lohan said:

My mom is a single mom of four children she has always been there for us, she was my mother and father and still is. My father is telling all lies to people and saying he was such a great dad and was always there for us, my father was never there for us, My mom was always there souporting us.

i think that the whole reason why my sister is upset with her self and not as cofident, is because of my dad not being around, and always staying out late and not coming home for days, he would come back home never himself, he was always was making excuses for his bad behavior. And would always blame my mother.

** The Hollywood Gossip note: It appears as though Ali uses the same spell check as Courtney Love. But we digress…

He just wants everybody in the world knowing that he was a great dad. He wasnt that is all a lie. I just want my sister [Lindsay Lohan] to stick throught this okay, and my mother and brothers and i are there for my sister 100% and have always been.

I’ve wanted to say this for so long and get this out there and let everyone know that our family is like a normal family but of course we are put under a microscope because of lindsays fame, lindsay will be fine she is just going through a rough time right now but she will be fine. i know this for a fact. My sisters is just like a normal sister. her and I have so much in common. My mother and sister are huge insperations to me, they have made it through so much in there lives.

Thankyou for your time god bless, Ali

First, Jamie-Lynn Spears. Now, Ali Lohan.

It’s one thing Britney, Lindsay, Nicole Richie, if you wish to mess with your own life. But please don’t make it seem like your actions are acceptable, or “normal.” Young lives are at stake.