Nosy Neighbor

Only The Real Housewives of New York City celebrate a party by bickering and back stabbing but perhaps that's why "The Party Is Toast."

We break down the naked models and dirty old men in THG's +/- recap.

Why oh why has someone let George leave Florida?  It's bad enough New York City must suffer its own Housewives. Must it endure their sleazy fathers? 

Minus 20. There's nothing cute or funny about George.

The constant sex jokes make me want to slap him and leave it to George to bring a sex toy to a White Elephant holiday party. George is tasteless bordering on crude and I'm with Carole. I wouldn't sit anywhere near him either.

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As The Real Housewives of New Jersey make their way through northern California, they warn that "If This RV Is a Rockn'" run in the other direction.

We break down all the laughs, tears, and unexpected nudity in THG's +/- recap:

Why can't Joe Gorga keep it in his pants. He insists on taking his equipment out and showing anyone within view? Why does Vito moon his girlfriend's brothers and pretend to have a tattoo? Why am I watching this show?

Some questions have no answers but the Housewives and family are still crammed into RVs and wreaking havoc on northern California.  Plus 10 for taking their special brand of lunacy on the road.

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Only The Real Housewives of New York City can throw a Christmas party that leaves guests asking "You Want to What Me in the Where?"

We break down the entire foul-mouthed affair in THG's +/- recap!

Before we get to the dirty Santa's helpers, let's recap Sonja's logo meetings. She meets up again with Heather and her crew but adds Ramona to the mix. 

Sonja had to know this was going to get messy. What was she thinking throwing these two together? Minus 10.  

Minus 9 to Heather and her crew as they try to push their point of view and are not always listening.  I like the silhouette of the lady in the logo and the font could be sexier.  Adding the naked guy just seems silly.

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The Real Housewives of New York City travel down to Miami to meet up with "Dirty Ol' Dad." The ladies brought their swimsuits, their heels and plenty of crazy as we recap it all in our THG +/- review.

Miami is beautiful. The sun, the sand, the surf.  Why do the Housewives have to bring along their craziness?

But let's start off with Carole. Since someone is offering to make her new novel into a TV show, finishing it is kind of important. The problem is she's been working on it for four years and she's can't stand to write about her protagonist for one minute more. Minus 10. If Carole doesn't like her main character, why will any else?

Off to Miami we go where the ladies check in with Carole's friend Ranjana at her palace in the sky. Plus 11 because the place is amazing. The view is spectacular and even Aviva with her fear of heights manages to hang out on the balcony.

Ranjana shows the ladies how to do face yoga which she obviously takes quite seriously. It might sound silly but it definitely works for Ranjana. At 56 the woman has beautiful skin. Plus 8.

That Ramona and Sonja manage to act like disruptive brats is no surprise. It seems to be the way they act at all parties.

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The Real Housewives of New Jersey are headed to Napa...the long way. "Pack Your Baggage" finds the ladies camping in heels. We recap all of the stupidity in our THG +/- review.

The show opens with the recap of Caroline commenting that Albie hasn't had a serious girlfriend in about two year but how he should really be concentrating on work. Minus 7. Albie's a grown man. Can't he have a career and a girlfriend?  You'd think mom would want him to be happy.

Well Momma Caroline might not be pleased when she hears that Albie's asked Lindsey to move in.  Actually Albie, Chris and Greg all ask her to move in and it really is kind of sweet.  Plus 10. Nice job boys.

But the trip to California is closing in almost as fast as hurricane Irene but that's not about to stop this crew. With the airports closed they ditch their kids on their parents and drive several hours to catch a flight out of Pittsburgh. Plus 8 for sheer determination.

Did we really have to witness both Joes peeing on the side of the road? Were the fast food restaurant bathrooms not good enough for them. Do their mommies need to remind them to go before they leave? Minus 12.

It takes a road trip and two flights to get this crew to San Francisco. What do they do when they're bored on a road trip? Watch videos of cows having sex of course. Minus 9.

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The Real Housewives of New York City are "Blinded By the Wine" and the gorgeous Miami skyline but is it enough of a distraction against the pervert who came to dinner?  We recap the strange photography and lewd dinner conversation in our THG +/- review.

Ramona can't wait to have lunch with Carole and Sonja. She's hoping to get all the dirt on Heather when something unexpected happens. The ladies only want to bitch about LuAnn. 

Plus 7.  Ramona's more than happy to go along with that conversation, unexpected as it may be.  Little does she know what LuAnn has in store for her next.

As Ramona's saying how nice it is that she and LuAnn can at least be civil to one another in public, LuAnn's polite facade gives way to some mean spirited and oh so pretentious wine games.

The set up is to blindfold Ramona in front of a crowd and ask her questions about her own wine in the hope that she'll embarrass herself.  Minus 12 to LuAnn and partner in wine snobbery Jaques. LuAnn needs to go back and read her own etiquette book. They may have found it funny but it's just plain mean to make fun of one of your guests…even Ramona.

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The Real Housewives of New Jersey try to "Sit Down and Man Up" before the big trip to Napa. Will any of it help them avoid complete and utter disaster? Let's recap all of the planning meetings of a vacation destined for failure in our THG +/- review.

Teresa's brand just continues to grow. She's got the books. Now she's planning on a line of Teresa aprons, her own specialty Bellini and maybe even T's pasta. Where will it end?

This all may be Teresa's dream but Joe can't keep his nose out of the middle of it. Minus 10 when he can't let Teresa get a word in edgewise during her meeting at the winery. 

But a big plus 15 because someone finally told Teresa that ingrediences is not a word! How many seasons has that taken?

Did anyone else find it funny that Joe was telling Teresa that her driving sucks when only one of them has a valid driver's license and it's not him?

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The Real Housewives of New York City finish off their trip to London and head back home. But "Good Trip, Bad Fall" finds the ladies in a bitter battle of royal proportions. Let's recap showdowns in our THG +/- review.

Um…what is Sonja doing?  Shouldn't someone tell her that one's face is not normally the part of one's anatomy that you usually stick in a bidet?  Plus 10 because you can always count on Sonja to do something so wacky that you can't help but laugh.

If only the rest of the Housewives had a sense of humor.

The rest of the London contingent is suffering through the Royal Wars as the Countess really gets under the Princess' skin.  Plus 8 because it does become quite funny. 

No matter what Carole says, Luann has done it and done it better. Is Luann's game of one upsmanship being done purposefully or can the Countess really not help herself. I think it's just her inherent need to believe she's better than the rest of the world.

But minus 11 because when Heather attempts to subtly call Luann out on her behavior it flies right over the Countess' head.  Luann does point out that she's had to cut many of her female friends out of her life because they became jealous, back stabbing, husband stealers. Wow. Someone still sounds a little angry.

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It's a big night for The Real Housewives of New Jersey and their families as they do "The Jersey Side Step" right out of the state. Can Melissa play to a crowd? Will the Manzo boys stay sober long enough to get some work done? We recap it all in this week's THG +/- review.

We start off small with Kathy heading over to an ice cream store in Paterson to ask them to taste her cookies but she complains when Rich takes over. Minus 8. If she really didn't want him to interfere she should have left him at home. 

And can someone please inform Richie that it's no longer 1992? He can turn his shirt collar down now. Minus 7.

The Beat Stock concert is fast approaching and we get glimpses of both Gia and Melissa practicing their routines. Before the show Teresa's kids are openly mocking aunt Melissa as Teresa and Joe laugh. Minus 10. If the Guidices were serious about mending the rift between their families they should have stopped the little brats immediately, not encouraged them.

Can someone please explain to me how people who are going bankrupt can afford a personal hair stylist and makeup artist?  I'm really confused.

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The Real Housewives of New York City head across the pond in "I'm U.K., You're U.K." It has everyone feeling OK, but what about those who were left behind? We recap all of the fake accents and awkward corporate cheerleading in THG's +/- recap!

Sonja, Luann, and Carole head off to London and you'd think after a red eye transatlantic flight everyone would be ready for a nap but not these girls.

Plus 10 because they're here to shop and they're not wasting a minute.

Plus 8 to Carole when she calls Luann Pumpkin Head. I couldn't help but laugh at that. Then she brushes it off by saying that she only calls her most gorgeous girlfriends by that moniker ... Is Luann really buying that?

Heather's obviously looking to impress the ladies with the penthouse but there's a price to pay: they have to attend Heather's Yummie Tummie corporate dinner. Minus 12. 

hose Rah! Rah! company dinners can be so boring but it'a 10 times worse if you don't work there. To make things even more awkward Heather makes everybody, including the ladies stand up and say what they love about Yummie Tummie. Ugh.

If things weren't uncomfortable enough, Luann calls Carole out for not standing during her turn. Minus 9. The Countess might write books about etiquette but that was a definite dig at the Princess.

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