We're really sorry, Dina Lohan.
For years, we've labeled you as the Worst Mother in the World. But you may need to pimp out your daughters and toot your own supposedly hard-working horn a lot louder in order to overtake Linda Hogan now.
Last week, daughter Brooke Hogan accused her mother of doing drugs, while also taking her to task yet again for dating 19-year old Charlie Hill.
In response, Linda (hiding behind representative Gary Smith) has written a statement to Perez Hilton in which she accuses her own child of:
- Having fake breasts;
- "Banging the crap" out of boyfriend Stack$ for three years;
- And scarcely selling any albums.
Linda also says ex-husband Hulk Hogan is "no different" from OJ Simpson and that young Charlie is really good at diving into a swimming pool.
Linda Hogan has set the awful mothering bar incredibly high. Will anyone be able to raise it?
You've gotta read this hilarious, rambling, grammatically-reprehensible statement to believe it:
If Brooke continues to spew lies on behalf of her father's lame attempt to distance himself from the reality that he is no different from the homicidal OJ Simpson, Charlie will be forced to put aside his paramedic/firefighting career path and release an album called "Redemption" which will easily surpass any of Brooke's records sales.
If it is her claim that her breasts are natural or she hasn't been banging the crap out of the pot head $tack for the last 3 years, then her comments of Charlie being a year and a half younger than her are again a complete fabrication (they are 4 months apart).