Hilton Hater

Hilton Hater

I am a senior staff writer at THG and a big fan of Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber and Robert Pattinson. I believe Kim Kardashian is bad for society, but great for attention, and that The Real Housewives should all be banned from existence.

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This is exactly what the world needs:

Kim Kardashian has released her very own iPhone application, as fans that simply need to ask for Kim's advice on fashion, beauty and relationship can now do so with a couple touches of their keypad.

For just $1.99, Kardashian will keep you up to date on her latest Tweets, photos, videos and more. Then again, you can visit TheHollywoodGossip.com and check out all these items at no charge.

Kim Calling

I know! Can you believe people will pay money to read my Tweets and take my advice?!? Send a thank-you card to Ray J, please.

The app will also help you find the nearest store that sells Kim's perfume, a brilliant idea that will soon be stolen by fellow celebrities.

It's easy to imagine the following stars coming out with their own iPhone apps for the following purposes:

  • Speidi: Locate the closest celebrity gossip photographer.
  • Jersey Shore: Where is the most convenient tanning salon and/or laundromat?
  • Tiger Woods: Track down the Las Vegas cocktail waitresses in your neighborhood. Also, call up the the most cliche-laden excuses for your behavior with the touch of a button!

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Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller are both in rehab and both stand accused of having a problem with drugs and alcohol. They might even get divorced.

But the orgy of bad news doesn't stop there: a woman that participated in a threesome with the couple is set to come forward and reveal intimate details about their life. Like, you know, she had a threesome with them.

“Brooke is bisexual,” a source told RadarOnline.com. “She and Charlie have had more than one woman share their bed in the short time they’ve been married.”

It's now been confirmed that a woman who has seen both Charlie and Brooke naked will soon come forward and dish on the outrageous details of this pair's relationship. Might Star magazine have actually gotten something right for once?

Tabloid Cover

The anonymous insider adds that "some of the women they slept also did drugs with them,” as Sheen and Mueller both face accusations of rampant cocaine use.

The actor could go to jail if convicted on a felony and misdemeanor charges in Colorado. If illicit drug use and the testimony by Denise Richards (that Sheen threatened to kill her in 2005) are brought into the trial, Charlie might never snort cocaine off his wife's belly while another woman sucks his toes ever again.

It's a tragic thought.

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New York might be the city that never sleeps, but it sure knows how to scream when Robert Pattinson is in town.

The actor stopped by Today yesterday for an interview with Matt Lauer and will sit down with Jon Stewart tonight on The Daily Show.

In between, the Twilight Saga star - in town to promote Remember Me - stopped and signed autographs for an adoring public. He couldn't even wait to do so, sprinting to meet them. Run, Robert, run!

Run, Rob!
  • Signing Star
  • Sign For Me, Please
  • Popular Guy

In the Lauer interview, posted below, Pattinson comes across as grounded and good-humored.

He makes a good point about his controversial Details magazine interview, saying critics get on you if you're too boring... and also give you a hard time when you say something scandalous. It's impossible to win.

Rob also admits that he wouldn't give interviews if it wasn't part of his job, seeming like someone that truly loves being an actor, yet is not obsessed with being a celebrity. How refreshing!

Check it out now:

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While all eyes were on Jake Pavelka Monday night and his decision to marry Vienna Girardi, ABC used its time in the TV spotlight to reveal the new cast of Dancing with the Stars.

The season will NOT include Kym Johnson, Dmitry Chaplin, Jonathon Roberts or Karina Smirnoff as professional partners. But the set of celebrities taking the stage will be comprised of one woman with a large vagina and one with large breasts, among others.

They are:

  • Kate Gosselin: Mother of eight
  • Chad Ochocinco: NFL wide receiver
  • Pamela Anderson (Billed as "The World's Sexiest Woman")
  • Aiden Turner: Soap opera stud
  • Erin Andrews (Should have been billed as "The World's Sexiest Woman")
  • Shannen Doherty: Washed-up actress
  • Buzz Aldrin: Former astronaut
  • Niecy Nash: Reno 911 star
  • Evan Lysacek: Gold Medal ice skater
  • Nicole Scherzinger: Professional singer
  • JAKE PAVELKA: The most-recent Bachelor/ABC-sponsored celebrity
Chad Ochocinco

The season kicks off on March 22. Considering the presence of Andrews, it will likely draw in more men than any previous edition.

Considering the presence of Jake, it will hopefully elicit more eye-rolls from anyone that believed for a second that The Bachelor was ever about love.

Think there are any early favorites?

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Christina Milian and The-Dream are new parents.

The singer/actress gave birth to daughter Violet on February 26, a sourced confirmed to People, adding that the child has "a full head of hair."

Bob and Brooke

This is the first child for Milian. It's the fourth for the singer/songwriter and record producer. He has three children with his ex-wife, singer Nivea.

The couple got married in September.

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As previously announced, the cast of Glee is going on tour.

Starting on May 18, you can catch Lea Michele and company in the following cities. Tickets go on sale on March 12 at Ticketmaster.com:

  • May 18 Phoenix, AZ Dodge Theatre
  • May 20 Los Angeles, CA Gibson Amphitheatre
  • May 21 Los Angeles, CA Gibson Amphitheatre
  • May 25 Chicago, IL Rosemont Theatre
  • May 26 Chicago, IL Rosemont Theatre
  • May 28 New York City, NY Radio City Music Hall
  • May 29 New York City, NY Radio City Music Hall

The Glee cast will sing favorites such as “Don’t Stop Believin’,” “Jump,” “Don’t Rain on My Parade,” Sweet Caroline" and "Somebody to Love." Watch its rendition of the final song listed below:

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It pays to have large breasts, a sex tape and an endorsement deal for an unhealthy weight loss supplement.

Multiple sources report that Kim Kardashian has just purchased a $4.8 million mansion in Beverly Hills.

With her yearly income, boosted by her new fragrance (as pictured below), it's safe to assume Kim didn't need to use any unstable adjustable-rate mortgages on that residence.

As long as she keeps posing on the red carpet, therefore, we doubt she'll fall victim to foreclosure, as so many citizens have in this market.

Fragrance Party

Reggie Bush will soon move into the 4,000 square-foot pad house, which should only fuel engagement rumors between the pair.

We wish Kim and Reggie the very best as they take this step in their relationship. It sounds like the only thing bigger than the new home is the Kardashians' need for attention.

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Big Papa who?!?

After having been romantically linked to that a dude with that nickname for most of her life on The Real Housewives of Atlanta, it's now been revealed that Kim Zolciak is dating a woman. Her name is Tracy Young.

An Atlanta Housewife

"Tracy broke up with her longtime girlfriend to be with Kim," an insider told Us Weekly. "Since they've been together, Tracy lost a lot of weight and got really skinny for Kim. They seem to be beyond happy with each other."

Zolciak appeared publicly for the first time with her script-mandated lover with Young at the Blacks' Annual Gala in Miami Beach on Saturday. The latter, a DJ, spun a remix of Zolciak's single, "Tardy for the Party," while Kim was overheard saying: "We're really happy!"

Simon van Kempen, a star on The Real Housewives of New York City, must have gotten an early look at the script for his Bravo counterpart recently. He's on record as saying Zolciak's sexuality will be a major storyline in 2010.

"The rumor is that Kim Zolciak will come out this season," Simon said.

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Thank goodness.

Both Khloe Kardashian and Kourtney Kardashian have signed on for a second season of their E! reality show, Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami. It's still unclear where the sisters are taking it, but "into the toilet" appears to be the leading candidate.

The new season will premiere this summer.

Last year, after being named the stars of their own show, Khloe suddently wed Lakers power forward Lamar Odom; while Kourtney found herself pregnant with a baby that belonged to lazy boyfriend Scott Disick.

It was almost as if producers asked the ladies to spice up their lives in some way. A crazy suspicion, we know. Might their reverse roles this summer, with Khloe getting knocked up and Kourtney walking down the aisle?

Lisa Berger of E! would only tease: "This time it's a whole different world as the pair must embrace their new life roles and juggle their hectic careers as they head back to South Beach where fun always follows."

Pardon us while we vomit.

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Some time during season nine, Adam Lambert will perform on American Idol.

It's safe to assume David Archuleta will, as well.

We can make this assumption because the former runner-up is releasing a memoir on May 4. It's titled "Chords of Strength" and here are a few snippets about it, courtesy of Amazon.com:

David Archuleta was named one of the "breakout stars of 2008" by Forbes magazine and landed the number two spot on the Billboard charts.

In Chords of Strength, David shares his unexpected and inspiring journey, including how he overcame vocal cord paralysis to achieve his dream of being a singer. He reveals insecurities he felt about his voice-before he realized that he loved the way singing made him feel more than he disliked the way he sounded.

In this personal memoir, David opens up about the strength he draws from his unshakable faith and unyielding family. He pays tribute to those who continue to inspire him and through their example help him believe in himself, his talent, and his abilities.

Meanwhile, a single off Archuleta's upcoming album has also leaked online.

Give a listen to "She's Not You" below.

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