Hilton Hater

Hilton Hater

I am a senior staff writer at THG and a big fan of Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber and Robert Pattinson. I believe Kim Kardashian is bad for society, but great for attention, and that The Real Housewives should all be banned from existence.

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Stop us if you've heard this before: Sources say Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are moving in together.

Of course, some tabloids have stated these two already share a home and are willing to give tours to any magazine that comes calling.

However, there's less truth to that story than there was in Tiger Woods' wedding vows.

“They’re not ready for a huge commitment, but right now the best thing to do seems to find a home with a lot of privacy and security where they can find out how compatible they really are,” a friend told In Touch Weekly of Robsten's plans.

So far, this imaginary search has taken Kristen and Rob to residences in Beachwood Canyon and the Hollywood Hills.

  • Pumped!
  • Lip Biter

Robert Pattinson seems excited, and Kristen Stewart nervous, about the possibility of cohabitation.

Adds the anonymous, totally real pal:

“Even if you are head over heels in love with each other, you never really know if one of you has habits that will drive the other crazy. They want to give it their best shot, and that’s a big deal.”

A very big deal. Our advice to Robert and Kristen: be open, be honest and don't keep any golf clubs around the house. Right, Tiger?

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Attention, readers: there's been a Taylor Squared sighting!

Rumored couple Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner were spotted on the set of their upcoming movie, Valentine's Day, looking as cute and as cozy as ever.

We can't verify the pair is "so in love," as irreponsible tabloids have reported, but we can confirm the following: we hope they are! Take a look at Taylor and Taylor driving away from the film's set... together:

Also, mark your calendars for February 12. On that date, Valentine's Day hits theaters and rumors about this pair will only grow stronger.

Check them, filming scenes for the flick, below:

  • Taylor Squared Photo
  • Pair of Taylors

Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift: A cute couple? Or the cutest couple? [Photos: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

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When asked why Adam Lambert has been booted off multiple ABC programs this month, Kara DioGuardi channeled Bill Clinton. She basically said:

It's the economy, stupid.

"We're living in a pretty bad economic time, so they have to do what they have to do to keep their advertisers," DioGuardi told E! News. "Networks are doing what they think their viewers want and don't want, so it's just budgetary."

Lambert, of course, found himself in hot water after he performed an excessively racy rendition of "For Your Entertainment" at the American Music Awards. Since then, ABC has canceled two of his previously-booked appearances on its network.

Many fans are citing an unfair double standard against the singer.

If they boycott the network, ABC might really need to worry about its advertisers!

Adam and Kara

The American Idol judge, who returns for her second season on the panel next month, also defended the crooner.

"We always know he's going to shock us, right? He's going to wow us and give us the unexpected, and that's his thing...That's what we look for."

In other words, ABC: you can't book Adam Lambert for a gig and then act surprised when he flaunts his sexuality.

DioGuardi knows a thing or two about that, as well: she stripped down to her bikini during the show's May finale; and said husband Mike McCuddy sees even more than that at home:

"I give him his own personal videos - sans the bikini."

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Come on, Paris Hilton. You're making this way too easy for us.

We know you've fallen off the celebrity gossip radar and need pointers from former BFF Kim Kardashian on how to remain relevant, but take this piece of advice:

Dressing like a skanked out Santa Claus is not the way to go.

Hilton appeared as Unsaintly Nick in Los Angeles this week, as she launched yet another fragrance, this one titled "Siren."

Indeed, the woman that taught Kim, Spencer Pratt and others how to rake in cash and headlines without contributing anything to society has been reduced to a perfume pitchwoman. It's both very sad and very awesome.

She also looks like a mannequin.

Ho, Ho!
  • Paris
  • For Siren
  • Former A-Lister
  • Holiday Spirit

Do you miss the days when Paris Hilton was an actual A-lister? [Photos: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

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Sorry, Kristen Stewart.

For once, that sound you hear is not the adoring screams of Twilight Saga fans around the world.

Mya Fashion Choice

Instead, it's the whirring siren of the celebrity fashion police. You're gonna need to pull over and answer for your crimes against reason and good taste.

We know New York City is often considered the center of the fashion universe, but that's no excuse for the dress you wore below to a recent screening of New Moon there. Its two sides are more mismatched than Bella and Emmett Cullen...

How should the fashion police deal with this violation?

 

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To many people, Adam Lambert's American Music Awards performance was offensive and, therefore, they are pleased with ABC for perpetually punishing the artist.

To members of our staff, however, Miley Cyrus is a far worse role model for today's youth than last season's American Idol runner-up.

For example, the young singer has created the "Hoedown Throwdown," a song/routine in which she challenges someone on stage to a dance-off. It's a cute idea, but we're not sure if a 17-year old with Miley's dating history should be involved in anything titled a "hoedown."

We're also not sure if she should drag her little sister into it.

But during a concert in Miami this week, Miley and Noah Cyrus hoedowned and threwdown with one another. You tell us: is this adorable or unacceptable?

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Move over, Tiger Woods. You may have company in the marital doghouse.

According to witnesses, Cash Warren - husband to Jessica Alba and father to Honor Marie - was spotted making out with Lindsay Lohan at a West Hollywood club on November 19.

A friend of Warren's told Us Weekly his pal often "gets into trouble" when he goes out without his wife.

Dancing the night away at club Villa, Warren and Lohan "ignored friends and just chatted," sources say. From there: "Lindsay and Cash started making out. Lip on tongue. It was raw. They were not shy!"

  • Cash Warren Picture
  • Lindsanity

From Jessica Alba to Lindsay Lohan: Upgrade? Or major, major, major downgrade?

Lohan says the story is "absurd," but she also says she has solid career prospects.

Those close to Warren and Alba, meanwhile, are afraid their marriage is already on shaky ground, saying: "Jessica is not as into Cash as she used to be."

As a result, might Cash soon be into Samantha Ronson's - and Harry Morton's and Jude Law's and Calum Best's and Criss Angel's and Riley Giles - sloppy seconds?!? That's gross.

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Hulk Hogan might not longer wrestle for a living, but he can't stop making headlines for major feuds.

Asked by Fox News about girlfriend Jennifer McDaniel, the former WWE star took a swipe at ex-wife Linda:

“My marriage to Linda was very toxic and very negative. Jennifer is just the opposite, she doesn’t drink or get high on drugs."

That's comforting, but it's not all. Hogan also said McDaniel hates celebrity gossip, might end up his next wife and, oh, follows the teachings of Jesus Christ.

“If you’re in my home and watching TV, you have to watch the science channel or the history channel or cartoons. She doesn’t watch anything negative like the news or TMZ. She doesn’t read the newspaper. She always walks in the Spirit of Christ, she never deviates. I can really see myself marrying this woman.”

Hulkster

As for his kids, Hulk is pointing them toward show business. Because that's worked out so well for the family as a whole.

“Nick is doing great, he's in L.A. and he just got his first acting job in an independent film,” He said. “Brooke is living down here; she signed with my agent and is going on auditions because we don't know if they will renew Brooke Knows Best yet.”

Heavens, why wouldn't they?!?

** Update: A source confirms to The New York Daily News that Hogan and McDaniel are engaged. Congratulations! We guess!

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Maybe we were wrong.

In October, we questioned why Esquire would name Kate Beckinsale the Sexiest Woman Alive.

Kate Beckinsale Picture

Is the actress beautiful? Of course. But we argued that Megan Fox should be permanently awarded this honor until senility set in.

However, Absolut Vodka has a message for the Beckinsale disbelievers: chew on these photos!

The sultry star is the new face and body of an Absolut ad campaign that proves Beckinsale is one of the most underrated sex symbols on the big screen. Click on the images below and you'll see why...

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It's rare for Kim Kardashian to wear clothing that doesn't accentuate her enormous breasts.

It's not rare, however, for her to make headlines for absolutely no reason at all.

With that in mind, Glamour has given the former sex tape star a "makeunder," which pretty much translates to sticking Kim in a baggy sweater and not applying enough makeup on her face to drown a kitten.

Asked about the toned-down look (below), Kardashian described it as the opposite of Ray J when he was banging her on video; i.e. “really soft."

  • Madeunder
  • For Glamour
  • Gorgeous in Glamour

Here's what else Kim told Glamour about her style, work ethic and relationship...

On career advice: “So many people think that everything will be handed to them, and that’s just not the case. You have to work for what you get.”

On who she's makeover: “Britney Spears. I feel I could style her a bit. I would love to see her hair glam and flowy.”

On contrasting hair colors: “I went blond last summer just to test it out. I felt like I was a different person, I swear. I do think blonds have more fun, but brunettes are sexier.”

On cooking for Reggie Bush: “I’m a great cook. His favorite meal is soul food: chicken and macaroni and cheese. That’s my specialty. I’ll cook it once a month with corn bread and greens. That I’ve mastered.

On marriage and/or baby urges: "I think about it all the time - it’s hard not to because of my family - but now isn’t my time.”

  • Classy Kim
  • Another Bikini Pic

Way above, Kim Kardashian is "madeunder." Directly above, she's donning her typical, scantily-clad outfits. Which look do you prefer?

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