Hilton Hater

Hilton Hater

I am a senior staff writer at THG and a big fan of Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber and Robert Pattinson. I believe Kim Kardashian is bad for society, but great for attention, and that The Real Housewives should all be banned from existence.

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As ex-girlfriend Tila Tequila deals with an alleged assault by Shawne Merriman, it must be hard for Courtenay Semel to get out of bed each morning.

But the talentless socialite knows there are people in America much worse off than she is; specifically, the 47 million citizens that lack health insurance.

In a show of support for these individuals, Semel took to the only outlet she's famous enough to have: Facebook. She posted the following message on her account yesterday:

Semel's Facebook

It's unclear how many people followed her order and posted this as their status for the day. We're guessing Joe Wilson was not among any of those that did.

We make fun of Courtenay often because her name is spelled stupidly; she pretends to be a lesbian in order to make headlines; and because she once lit an ex-girlfriend's hair on fire.

But, hey, at least she's taking a stand on an issue with this Facebook post. That's preferable to celebrities that think the world needs to hear about their every thought and mundane action (yes, we're looking at you, Miley Cyrus).

Has Semel changed your mind on health care reform? Where do you stand on the issue?

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Dannielynn Birkhead turned three years old this week.

To celebrate the occasion, exploitative father Larry Birkhead appears to have sold his daughter to the highest bidder once again, setting up another photo shoot for her with a celebrity gossip tabloid.

Grilled by OK! Weekly, Larry was asked such challenging questions as: "Do you love being a dad?"

Unfortunately, the magazine never asked Birkhead how much money he makes every time he pimps out his daughter like her late mother, exposing her to a life in front of the camera that is unlikely to end well. Just check out this frightening photo:

Here are excerpts from the interview:

On Dannielynn turning three: It seems only weeks ago I was bringing her home and now all this time has gone by and she’s bigger and wiser and such a great kid. Her birthday is a happy occasion. Parties are always stressful for me because I try to make them these big blowouts. But she’s at the age where she appreciates it now and she’s excited.

On being a dad: It’s hard work and time consuming but it’s worth it when I hear her laugh. All my friends are out in bars, but I don’t miss it. In fact, I’m morphing into my parents — I’ve become corny and sensible.

On missing her mother: She misses her mom so much. Right now she’s at the age where she’s noticing that other children in television and in books have moms. She said to me the other day quite seriously, “Where’s my mom?” It was sad but I explained to her, “Your mommy is in the clouds and you’ll see her again one day.”

If you can stand it, click on the photos below for more grotesque shots of Larry, likely raking in the cash, posing with Dannielynn:

Dannielynn in OK!
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As loyal American Idol viewers, we're concerned.

The more we hear from Ellen DeGeneres, the more we think she's the wrong woman for the job of American Idol judge. Speaking to Ryan Seacrest on his radio show today, the comedian said:

Lee Does His Thing

“I’m not going to be mean. I hate it when Simon’s that mean," she said, adding that she'll tell Cowell that to his face when it happens.

That's a problem, though: we love it when Simon is mean, or at least when he's honest about a singer's ability or performance. No one wants to hear false, flowing praise from any of the judges.

DeGeneres did have kind words for Paula Abdul, whose fan base she hopes not to offend by taking a seat next to Simon, Randy Jackson and Kara DioGuardi.

“I hope Paula’s OK with it,” she said. “I don’t want anyone to think I took Paula’s job away. Paula was a huge part of the show, and that’s a role that needs to be filled by someone in a totally different way."

What will her way entail? According to Ellen, she's a "fan like everybody else."

“Ultimately, it doesn’t come down to some expert in the music industry, it comes down to the person at home that says, ‘That’s the person I relate to and whose records I’m going to buy.’ I hope to be that voice.”

But that voice is Simon's! Viewers at home don't sit around, gushing over every contestant. They bash various singers to their friends and yearn to actually utter the critiques that Cowell delivers on a weekly basis. Remember: not every performer is Adam Lambert.

Do you agree or disagree? Do you think Ellen was a good choice for this role?

 

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According to Kim Kardashian, there's one thing she loves more than attention:

Her sisters.

Kim Kardashian Naked Photo

For that reason, the publicity hound is fighting back against a tabloid feature that she and her family may very well have put out there to begin with.

In the latest issue of Star, the magazine screams that Kim, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian are "AT WAR!" The cover story goes on to detail the "catfights, jealous fits and trash talk" that go on between the siblings.

The Week in Celebrity Gossip: The Kardashians might be at war. And Rachel Artz might be giving Chris Ivery a look at her anatomy!

On her official blog, Kim denied all such accusations, writing: 

If my sisters and I have cat fights they are 100% playful, sisterly fights!! You've seen how we tease each other on the show, and how we joke around on Twitter... it's what sisters do!!! There's no war here, people! I'm so grateful to have my sisters around me and I know we'll always support each other no matter what!

Knowing the Kardashians enjoy tabloid coverage almost as much as they like sex tapes, would anyone be shocked if the family planted this story, simply to debunk it later on and then receive sympathy from fans?

After all, as Sarah Palin is yet to learn when it comes to Levi Johnston comments, the best way to ensure that a story dies is simply to ignore it. Instead, Kim actually posted this cover shot on her popular website.

Something smells fishier than a vulva infected with bacterial vaginosis.

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What's the next best thing to Robert Pattinson nude?

Okay, it's Robert Pattinson shirtless.

But what's the next best thing after this that will satisfy Twilight Saga fans? That's easy:

An adult film actor pretending to be Pattinson's Edward Cullen and making love on camera to a faux Bella Swan.

That's exactly what fans can expect in This Isn't Twilight: The XXX Parody, a pornographic movie that officially proves Twlight has gone mainstream. The flick will be released on October 15.

Which movie are you more likely to see?

Taking over the role of Bella from Kristen Stewart will be Jenna Haze, the Female Performer of the Year at the 2009 AVN Awards. She has anchored such mature fare as Spunk'd 6, Load Warrios and This Ain't the Munsters XXX.

For the record, the first 29 installments of This Ain't the Munsters were much better.

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This might explain why Miley Cyrus always flashes two fingers at photographers...

According to sources on the set of the Sex and the City sequel, the Disney star will make a cameo in the highly-anticipated comedy. A script page has even blocked out October 16 as the day Cyrus will shoot.

“They’ve asked her,” said an insider. “But she hasn’t confirmed. Right now, they’re just holding the space for her.”

So Peaceful

Anything involving sex seems to be right up Miley Cyrus' alley. [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

What role might Miley play in the movie, which will be released on May 28, 2010?

Shots of Kim Cattrall and Sarah Jessica Parker confirm that the quartet of main characters flashes back to the 1980s at one point in the story. Could Cyrus play a younger version of Charlotte? They have a similar hair color.

Then again, perhaps she'll simply appear as a stripper in a club. Everyone knows she has experience in that area.

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Ian Somerhalder appeared on MTV's It's On with Alexa Chung this week.

During the interview, the actor was asked about The Vampire Diaries and whether or not there's room in pop culture for more pretend blood suckers. His short answer? Yes. His reasoning? Find out below:

Chung also compared Somerhalder to one younger actor (Chace Crawford) and old older actor (Rob Lowe). We're sure The CW would be thrilled if viewers agree, considering it airs both Gossip Girl and The Vampire Diaries.

Let's take a look at the trio of stars...

A Tasty Chacer

See any resemblances?

As you ponder that question, follow this article's jump for another sexy Vampire Diaries poster.

Continue Reading...

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Kim Kardashian is back!

Any celebrity gossip follower would ask the obvious question ("Where the heck did she go? She's been featured in every tabloid all summer long."), but the reality TV star swears she wasn't herself over the last few weeks.

The culprit? That dangerous blonde hair. Fortunately, Kim said goodbye to the lighter locks this week.

"Loved the blonde but that is my alter ego, I am back!" she Tweeted yesterday. "Feels good to be me again! I swear I was a different person w blonde hair."

Really? She seemed like the same attention-starved, money-hungry sell out to us.

Pedikure for Kim
  • Back to Black
  • Photo of Kim

Kim Kardashian has returned to her black roots. Call us cynical, but it's almost like she went blonde just to create headlines and garner attention for herself.

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We love Ellen DeGeneres. She's the funniest talk show host on the planet and she has a really hot wife.

Heck, she can even dance well, as Ellen is known to start each program with a bit of a boogie.

But, to our knowledge, the comedian has zero singing expertise, making her an odd choice to replace Paula Abdul as the fourth judge on American Idol. Still, that's exactly what's taken place, confirms Fox.

"DeGeneres will sit alongside Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson and Kara DioGuardi and offer her own unique perspective to the contestants throughout the competition," the network said in a statement.

New Idol Judge

Said DeGeneres, with her typically understated, dry wit:

"I'm thrilled to be the new judge on American Idol. I've watched since the beginning, and I've always been a huge fan. So getting this job is a dream come true, and think of all the money I'll save from not having to text in my vote."

Ellen - who is keeping her talk show host gig - added that she'll bring the perspective of someone "who is going to buy the music." That's fine and all, but Monday Night Football tried a similar idea with Dennis Miller as an announcer and it failed miserably.

Most upset about this decision will be Simon Cowell. DeGeneres is a lesbian. Unlike Abdul, her flirting with Cowell will likely be kept to a minimum.

Are you excited for Ellen to serve as a judge?

 

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With apologies to Liam McDermott and both of Denise Richards' daughters, the most exploited celebrity baby alive has a birthday today.

Dannielynn Hope Marshall Birkhead turns three years old, an occasion her pimp-like father will likely celebrate by taking her to mom Anna Nicole Smith's grave and inviting photographers along for the ride.

That's just how he rolls.

A year ago, Larry Birkhead milked this occasion for all the money he could, placing Dannielynn's adorable mug on the cover of a supermarket tabloid. It's the gift that keeps on giving cash into his bank account and years of therapy to his child.

Today, we just wanna wish Dannielynn a safe, happy, healty, unexploitive birthday. Hurry up and turn 18 so you can emancipate yourself from your money-hungry dad.

Daddy and Dannielynn
  • Dannielynn Birkhead
  • Us Cover Girl

** Update: Dannielynn actually turned three years old on September 7. But we stand by everything else in this story!

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