Hilton Hater

Hilton Hater

I am a senior staff writer at THG and a big fan of Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber and Robert Pattinson. I believe Kim Kardashian is bad for society, but great for attention, and that The Real Housewives should all be banned from existence.

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Danielle Staub has narrowly avoided the worst day of her life.

The psychotic reality star has reached a settlement with ex-husband Kevin Maher, the day before she was scheduled to be deposed as part of Maher's defamation suit against allegations that he played Russian Roulette inside Staub's vagina and murdered her dog.

Red Carpet Danielle

In anticipation of Staub answering questions under oath about these accusations, Maher had told the world he would destroy Danielle on October 5. Instead, he just took her money quietly.

The terms of the settlement are confidential, but a source confirms that cash was involved, while Maher told TMZ:

"The matter was resolved to the satisfaction of both parties... It's interesting that the case gets settled the day before Danielle was supposed to be deposed... it was going to be the worst day of her life."

When you're someone like Danielle Staub, isn't everyday the worst day of your life?

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The Real Housewives of Atlanta returns to Bravo tonight with two new cast members and one old nose job.

NeNe Leakes previewed both in a recent interview with TV Guide, going into detail about Phaedra Parks and Cynthia Bailey, among other topics:

On Parks: I knew Phaedra before...  We went to the same high school. I'm a little bit older. When we were in school - and I can say this because she told me this herself - she would say to me, "I've always looked up to you. I've always admired you." I was very popular in high school. Once she was on this show, though? She never really talked to me or spoke to me. It was strange. She had nothing at all to say to me. I felt like there was some type of jealousy there.

NeNe Promo Pic

NeNe Leakes just wants to be a black woman, alright?!?

On her nose job: A lot of what you may have heard is just [rumor]. I speak very openly about it on our show, both what I have done and what I have not done. I tell it like it is. I don't have anything to hide. And for the record, I am not against plastic surgery. I believe that any woman that wants to do anything or fix anything that bothers her - if she's doing it for herself - I'm all for it.

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Don't worry, Robsten fans: a bushy beard has not prevented Robert Pattinson from nuzzling close to Kristen Stewart.

The couple was spotted at Soho House in West Hollywood on Saturday night, as a witness told E! News the pair was in serious danger of a citation from the PDA police:

As Edward

"They were staring at each other throughout dinner and kept stealing quick kisses from one another during the night. Rob's arm was around her for most of dinner and they kept looking at each other and giggling throughout the evening. They are definitely into each other."

Doesn't sound like a relationship in trouble, does it?

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Gonas is totally a go!

After weeks of keeping their relationship under wraps, Joe Jonas and Ashley Greene were spotted out multiple times last week, always holding hands and looking cozy with one another. The interactions make sense, giving the feelings between the adorable pair.

  • Gonas!
  • A Hug for Joe

Hand holding, hugging and hotness: A day in the life of Joe Jonas and Ashley Greene.

"[Joe] is head over heels for [Ashley]," a source tells People. "He thinks she is down-to-earth and absolutely beautiful. He hasn't been this into a girl in a long time."

While this insider remained mum on seemingly premature engagement rumors, he did confirm that Ashley took Joe to Florida to meet her parents recently and, overall, "they want to spend as much time together as possible."

We'd feel the same way if we were dating someone that looked like Joe Jonas or Ashley Greene.

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Late last week, R&B singer Mario was arrested for assault against his mother.

With his client free on bail, the artist's attorney spoke on the incident over the weekend and acknowledged that a confrontation took place. But he cited the drug history of Mario's mom (Shawntia Hardaway) as its basis.

"Anyone who has waged the battle to save loved ones from the forces of drugs knows the irrational behavior that almost always accompanies their actions," said Hassan Murphy. "Despite the allegations, Mario remains committed to supporting his mother."

Police responded to Hardaway's call on Friday and found an apartment in disarray. They booked her son on charges of second degree assault after Shawntia accused him of pushing her in the chest.

Murphy referred to this "unfortunate incident between a loving son and a mother" as something that happens when one side struggles "with a devastating addiction."

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Khloe Kardashian is not pregnant. In fact, despite what the tabloids may scream on their covers, no one in this attention-starved family is knocked up.

Still, Khloe has made it clear she wants a baby... as long as God is down with that, and as long as it doesn't interfere with her goal of becoming skinnier than most science class skeletons.

Speaking to Us Weekly last week, Kardashian outlined the three reasons why she's afraid to be pregnant. They included:

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We heart you, Saturday Night Live.

On this weekend's installment, new cast member Vanessa Bayer took on her first lead in a sketch, doing an outstanding job mocking Miley Cyrus, while host Bryan Cranston played father Billy Ray.

You've, like, gotta, like, watch this, like, impression, as Bayer parodies Miley's numerous statements about how, like, she's a serious actress. Like, check it out below...

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Katie Holmes, Alicia Keys, Kim Kardashian and others have come out to Keep A Child Alive.

The organization provides care and support to families affected by HIV/AIDS in Africa and India, as readers can get donate $5 to the cause by texting the first names of any of the celebrities participating to 90999.

Keys and husband Swizz Beatz founded the charity. Says the former:

“With the launch of our BUY LIFE campaign, I am confident less people will needlessly have to die because of lack of proper care which means more children will still have parents to raise them and guide them. I’m never more inspired, then when I’m doing this!”

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Miley Cyrus became a Voyeur on Thursday night, hitting up a Hollywood club by that name and getting down on the dance floor.

"She was constantly smiling and seemed to be in great spirits," a witness told Us Weekly, saying the 17-year old "waved her hands in the air and danced seductively while shaking her hips" to singles by David Guetta and DJ Khaled.

  • Going to the Club
  • Ready for Da Club

Miley Cyrus is in need of a cheeseburger or two dozen. [Photo: Pacific Coast News]

Hanging at a 21-plus establishment, Miley was on her best behavior, this onlooker added:

"It was clear she knew she was being watched by others. No alcohol was in her presence the entire night."

That is good to hear. It means Cyrus won't need to release any more videos that clear up some rumor about her at the club.

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Rick Sanchez does not like Jon Stewart at all. He also has no clue what the word "bigot" means. Allow us to explain.

The CNN anchor appeared today on the Sirius radio show Stand Up! with Pete Dominick. Asked about Stewart, who is in the news these days for his planned Rally to Restore Sanity, Sanchez replied simply: "I think Jon Stewart’s a bigot."

Could you elaborate, Rick?

"I think he looks at the world through, his mom, who was a school teacher, and his dad, who was a physicist or something like that. Great, I’m so happy that he grew up in a suburban middle class New Jersey home with everything you could ever imagine."

Okay. Thanks for that bio. But you do understand that one must be bigoted against a certain group, right? Keep explaining yourself, please: Who is Stewart biased against?

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