Hilton Hater

Hilton Hater

I am a senior staff writer at THG and a big fan of Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber and Robert Pattinson. I believe Kim Kardashian is bad for society, but great for attention, and that The Real Housewives should all be banned from existence.

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Ellen DeGeneres turned 52 years old yesterday, but her viewers got the real treat:

Adam Lambert performed his single "Strut" on the talk show, and followed it up by presenting Ellen with a special present: an autographed portrait of himself... and his underwear.

Both items will be put up for auction, with the proceeds going toward relief efforts in Haiti.

“I wore my special Ellen underwear,” he told DeGeneres, as the audience cheered. They might be a little sweaty, but these are up for auction, as well.”

WATCH LAMBERT PERFORM BELOW.

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Suddenly, Tila Tequila doesn't seem so crazy...

A Chinese woman that wants to win back her ex-boyfriend is making plans to resemble his ideal woman, Jessica Alba.

According to Fox News, a 21-year-old named Xiaoqing, told The Shanghai Daily that she has met with doctors at a plastic surgery clinic and has "made my decision" to undergo a variety of procedures. The goal of them? To emulate Alba in every physical way possible.

"I'm not only doing it for my ex-boyfriend, but for myself," she said. "I am a psychologically weak person. I want to do something to challenge myself and build a strong personality through it."

J. Alba

The woman will reportedly need eyebrow lifting, eyelid reshaping and nose reconstruction to look like the beauty pictured above.

Xiaoqing told the newspaper that her former flame decorates the walls of his bedroom with Jessica Alba pictures and demanded she do her make-up like the actress, even when she slept. He also gave her a wig for Christmas and demanded it she wore it at all times.

"I love him very much.... that's why I always followed his opinions. I don't want to lose him," Xiaoqing said.

Why would you? The guy sounds like a winner.

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Looks like Adrian Pasdar couldn't flee the Heroes set quickly enough!

The actor that played Nathan Petrelli on that critically-lambasted series was arrested early this morning for "failing to maintain his lane," according to police, on the 405 in Los Angeles. He was clocked driving his Ford F-150 truck at 94 mph.

Reports indicate that cops pulled Pasar over around 3 a.m. and smelled alcohol on his breath. He refused to take a breathalyzer and was eventually placed under arrest for suspicion of DUI.

The actor - who is married to Dixie Chicks singer Natalie Maines - was taken to a nearby jail. His bail was set at $15,000, but, hey, it could be worse:

He could still be starring on Heroes.

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Earlier this week, multiple sources reported that Brooke Mueller was ordered by doctors to rest and relax in order to fight off a recent infection.

We wonder if they have masseuses and spa treatments in rehab.

A Happier Time

According to Entertainment Tonight, that's where Charlie Sheen's troubled wife is headed, as insiders say she has entered a drug and alcohol center in North Carolina.

Mueller was arrested on a DUI charge in 1996 and for cocaine possession in 2001. She was released from the hospital on Monday, where she was being treated for pneumonia.

Legally, Brooke is still barred from communicating with Sheen. A judge will rule on a protective order against the actor next month. Until then, it sounds like Mueller is doing her best to clean up her act and become the best mother she can be to young twins Sam and Max.

We wish her the best of luck with that goal.

** UPDATE: Mueller's attorney, Yale Galanter, says his client is NOT in rehab. He says she's at a facility that helps patients recover from serious illnesses, such as pneumonia.

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Take one part Lady GaGa, mix it with a dash of Madonna and toss in some Pink. The result? Burgeoning music superstar Ke$ha.

In an interview with Rolling Stone, the singer explains the origin of her name's spelling, while planning for a huge 2010...

On the year ahead: Let's just pretend the world ends in 2012, I want people to live as if it's 2011 in December. I try not to think too far ahead, because I also feel like I'm trying to do as much as I can to set myself up properly. I put on the best live show, the absolute best live show I can possibly can.

On the irony of the dollar sign in her name: It's so weird, I hate champagne, so there's a song called "Party at a Rich Dude's House" where I went and peed in the champagne bottles and thought it was hilarious. Just kind of being an asshole, really, is what that song's about.

On the name of her album: Animal, the name of the record, it's kind of my steez, I have to say. I named it that because I want people to lose it when they listen to my record and go to the animal part of themselves that they suppress. Society has taught us to suppress certain things and not do certain things.

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Tila Tequila has good news and contrived news for celebrity gossip followers. First, the good:

She's going away! The former Penthouse pin-up Tweeted her farewell last night: GOODBYE HOLLYWOOD! I WILL MISS YOU! BUT I HAVE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE 2 DO NOW!

Tequila is referring, of course, to the alleged fetus growing inside her body. She confirmed to blog readers yesterday she's pregnant, though most people with a third grade education or higher doubt the veracity of this news.

Will she actually disappear for longer than it takes to shower and restart her computer? Of course not. But let's enjoy these Tila Twitter-free moments while they last...

Prior to signing off, Tequila claims she sent a photo of her sonogram to Radar Online. How do we know it's real? Because the letters in the corner (ng) are the first two letters of her last name. D'uh!

No way that can be photoshopped...

Tila Tequila Sonogram

You can see a gestational sac in the picture, which is the earliest sonographic finding of a pregnancy. We won't actually believe Tila is knocked up, however, until there's a live baby and a blood test taken.

Referring to plans with Casey Johnson, Tequila wrote on the website:

"We talked about one of us getting pregnant so we can have another baby of our own. We talked about this for a very long time, and we both agreed that I would be the one carrying the baby.

"So that is the reason why I got pregnant. It was for Casey and I, and that is also why I was so devastated when she passed away because now I have our baby in my belly, but she has passed away."

But is Casey really gone? Yes. Still, Tila said she came to her in a dream and:

"She told me not to cry anymore and not to worry. She told me she is in heaven now watching over me and always and forever protecting me and our baby. She then handed the baby over to me, kissed me, and said "I love you T, please don't cry anymore! Just take care of our baby.'"

What a sweet thing for a fake fiancee to say, don't you agree?

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Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart would have turned 254 years old today if he were alive.

The Austrian composer is responsible for over 600 pieces and is often cited as an archetypal example of the Classical style of music.

As Mozart's career went on, he grew to specialize in chromatic harmony that was rare for his era. In 1769, he was honored as the concertmaster of the archbishop and was knighted by the pope in Rome. Not even Taylor Swift has accomplished those achievements!

A father of six, Mozart wrote one of his masterpieces, "Die Zauberflöte," in the last year of his life. He passed away from mercury poisoning (look out, Jeremy Piven!) while being treated for syphilis.

Send in your posthumous birthday wishes today!

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

In other celebrity birthday news, Lil John turns 39 and British model Daisy Lowe is 21 today.

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On last night's American Idol audition show in Los Angeles, viewers were introduced to a pair of rumored finalists:

  1. Andrew Garcia
  2. Chris Golightly

We've previewed both those contestants, as readers can click on the links above to read more about each.

Up now in our season nine preview: Katie Stevens. The 17-year old auditioned in Boston with a rendition of "At Last" by Etta James. She received anonymous approval for Hollywood.

It will be hard not to root for Stevens in the upcoming rounds.

She speaks fluent Portuguese and is especially close to her grandmother, an Alzheimer's disease patient. As you can see above, this high school student from  Middlebury, Connecticut also plays guitar.

Relive her American Idol audition below and chime in with your thoughts on her potential.

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For the third time, Scarlett Johansson is starring in an advertising campaign for Spanish brand Mango.

And for the third time, we'd like to say: thank you, Mango!

For the photo shoot, the 25-year-old beauty wore new designs from the Spring 2010 line and said of it:

“I love working with Mango. This is the third campaign I have done with them. The photographer, Mario Sorrenti, makes me feel very comfortable: the sessions are great fun.”

Johansson will next be seen in the big screen in May. She'll star as The Black Widow Iron Man 2. For now, enjoy Scarlett looking as sexy as ever in her latest spread...

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Soon after the calendar turned to 2010, Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves welcomed their second child into the world. It should be a time for celebration, right?

Wrong, says Camila's mother.

According to unreliable sources at The National Enquirer, Multo Abrigado is pressuring Alves to force the actor into marriage or a financial arrangement that will guarantee the future well-being of her kids.

"Camila's mother is very traditional, and she's worried that since they are not married, Matthew could leave her daughter high and dry with two kids if he falls out of love with her," a source said, making the first ever comparison between McConaughey and Levi Johnston.

  • Sweaty and Sexy
  • Camila and Levi

How did the often-shirtless hunk react when Alves followed through on her mother's advice? He "exploded," the insider claims:

"He said, 'I'll always take care of our babies - and you!'"

Since becoming a mother, Alves has put her modeling career on hold. Little Levi McConaughey is 18 months old, while daughter Vida was born on January 3.

While Camila doesn't know what to do next, her mother won't take her eye off the fiscal ball. Concludes the anonymous source:

"Now Multo is pressuring Cam to get Matthew to commit to a legal agreement. She said, 'He wanted you to carry his babies - he ought to take real responsibility.'"

He also ought to take that shirt off in the photo above. Come on, Matthew!

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