Hilton Hater

Hilton Hater

I am a senior staff writer at THG and a big fan of Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber and Robert Pattinson. I believe Kim Kardashian is bad for society, but great for attention, and that The Real Housewives should all be banned from existence.

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When God sat down to craft the perfect celebrity, He likely came up with Heidi Klum.

This super model has four children; has been happily married for five years; is involved in numerous charities; makes millions of dollars a year; and looks great naked.

She and Seal renew their vows once per year because, as Heidi beautifully puts, "it's about remembering this moment of love we gave to each other and reinforcing it. It's so special to us, something we love and something our children have gotten accustomed to."

Simply Beautiful

Klum made a cameo in The Devil Wears Prada and has also found success on the small screen. She hosts Project Runway and has guest-starred on such hit shows as How I Met Your Mother and Sex and the City.

Heidi turns 37 today and, yes, this is all an excuse to honor the birthday gal with a photo montage. Sit back, ogle the beauty below and be sure to send your best wishes to her on this special day...

  • Heidi on the Red Carpet
  • Heidi Picture
  • Klum
  • Very Sexy
Heidi the Hottie
  • Touch Up Time
  • Heidi Klum, Cleavage
  • Topless Heidi Klum
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For the first time since his wife was killed in Cancun, Bruce Beresford-Redman has spoken out.

The former Survivor producer has officially been charged with "qualified homicide" by Mexican authorities, seven weeks after Monica Beresford-Redman was found strangled to death in a sewer near the Moon Palace resort, where the couple had been on vacation.

"I am devastated at her loss; and I am incensed at the suggestion that I could have had anything to do with her death," Bruce said in a statement yesterday, responding to his arrest warrant. "I am innocent."

Bruce has been the sole person of interest in the case because sources confirmed he'd been having an affair, and witnesses spotted Bruce and Monica arguing on the beach the night she was killed.

Continued Bruce in his statement:

"Monica was the axis around which our whole family revolved. From her sisters and parents to my parents and of course to our children and me, she was everything to us. My children have had one parent taken from them by a senseless act of violence. I implore the Mexican authorities not to take their remaining parent by a miscarriage of justice and to do what is right not just what is expedient."

Beresford-Redman returned to the United States last week, against the wishes of Mexican officials. He's filed for full custody of his two young children. If necessary, Mexican authorities will extradite him to their country.

Attorney Richard G. Hirsch referred to the warrant as "extremely disturbing" and said his client was "innocent of this crime and is prepared to defend himself in a court of law."

He'll eventually get the chance to.

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A newborn was taken home this week; a nine-year old received lavish gifts at her birthday party; and, of course, Danielle Staub was at the center of all the drama. Incredibly, she managed to come across worse than ever. That's hard to do.

Follow along with our Real Housewives reviewer as she goes inside the fifth episode of season two of The Real Housewives of New Jersey. As usual, the show was both nauseating and entertaining...

Sweet fancy Moses!  Tonight’s episode was so crazy I actually felt stressed-out watching it.  I got all hot and my heart was racing.  This show is proving to have an adverse effect on my health.  Reminder to self:  Must take a Xanax chased by an entire box of wine followed by an entire carton of Blue Bell Old Country Ice Cream before watching next week.

Everything started out sweet... well, sort of.  Teresa and Shirtless Joe (who, shockingly, wore a shirt the entire time but I still like that nickname) brought baby Audriana home.  The baby got to enjoy sister Gia’s ninth birthday party.  This was quite an event!  Teresa hired a hot pink limo to take Gia and her friends to a spa to get facials, manicures, fancy hairdos, and then, oddly, to form a mosh pit and grind under a disco ball. 

Spas where I live don’t typically have disco balls and dance floors, but perhaps I am just ignorant on this subject.

The Housewives Girl

Let’s just pause for a moment on this birthday party, okay?  When I was nine would I have wanted a facial and a fancy hairdo?  Hell no!  I would have wanted a homemade cake, a Pound Puppy or two, and probably a few runs down the Slip n’ Slide in my backyard.  Judging by the faces of some of the little girls in attendance at this party, they were thinking the same thing.  Their expressions ranged from excited to confused, perplexed, and overwhelmed. 

I could so identify with the more freaked-out girls. Who doesn’t remember being invited to a birthday party that you instantly regretted attending?  Some of those poor kids looked like they just wanted to call their moms and escape from Teresa’s World of Tutus and Insanity.

While I do think Teresa is a genuinely loving mom and I know she only wants what is best for her daughters, she is teaching them from infancy that materialism is the greatest value one can possess. She brags to us, “Gia is my oldest and it’s her ninth birthday today.  And of all my daughters she is the most high-maintenance, so I want her party to be an event to remember.” 

Umm... maybe she’s so high-maintenance because you insist on making everything an “event to remember."  If you didn’t make such a big stink over every little thing, your daughter wouldn’t be a “diva." Teresa goes on to say, “Gia is a total girly-girl.  Teresa only raises divas, not tomboys.”   

Being a diva isn’t like being born with brown eyes; one has some control over it.  Teresa seems essentially kind and sweet, but I really do wonder what her daughters will be like when they grow up.  I imagine they won’t be what Teresa is hoping for.

But let’s move on to the focus of tonight’s episode:  The Showdown at the Brownstone!

Continue Reading...

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In a recent interview with Billboard, Miley Cyrus made it clear she loves her own music.

But the singer also opened up about something she hates, in a rambling, nonsensical way. Asked about the Fox smash Glee, Miley said:

“Honestly, musicals? I just can’t. What if this was real life and I was just walking down the street on Rodeo Drive and all of a sudden I just burst into song about how much I love shoes?"

She then paused, laughed and patted herself on the back, saying: "It would get you hits on YouTube.”

Ah, classic Miley: not giving credit to another musical sensation, and also pointing out just how popular she is with that YouTube comment.

Cyrus in Concert

Someone should probably tells Cyrus that maybe she "can't" handle musicals, but over 13 million people can. They tune in to Glee each week.

So, is there any musician out there Miley does respect? Lady Gaga, she says.

“Unlike a lot of artists, all her music does mean something personally."

Do you wanna tell Miley that Gaga recently said it was a dream come true to have her songs covered by Glee? Or should we relay that message instead?

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Kristen Stewart has been at the center of controversy in American this week.

First, she compared the paparazzi to rapists and took her hatred of fame to a new, low level.

Then, she debuted on the FHM list of the Sexiest Women in the World, all the way at number-six. Think this ranking was deserved?

Stewart hasn't been around to answer questions about these developments, however, because she's spanning the globe promoting Eclipse. The actress and co-star Taylor Lautner most recently answered questions at a Q&A session in Australia. Cute pics follow...

Down Under Stars
  • Doing Promotion
  • Smiling in Sydney
  • Taylor Pose
  • Lucky Fans

[Photos: Splash News]

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Think Kim Kardashian has an easy life? Just consider the difficult last few days this reality star has endured...

First, she had to wake up and garner page views for her blog by posing with nephew Mason.

Then, she was forced to stand alongside her sisters on the cover of Vegas magazine.

From there, it was off to a Shape photo shoot, where Kim stood around in a bikini while crew members scrambled and actually were put to work all around her.

After that, she was a guest star at the Indy 500 and posed for photographs on the red carpet of an Atlantic City event.

For all these efforts, Kim had to speak nary a word or show off a single talent - and she likely pocketed over one million dollars. Consider yourself warned, readers:

THG may have to soon star in our own sex tape. After all, the mere act of getting railed by Ray J can result in a long career as... a professional celebrity. Relive Kim's week below.

Another Bikini Picture
  • Kim in Atlantic City
  • Shape Photo
  • Very Much in Shape
  • Vegas Girls
  • Cute Nephew
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There's one person on the planet happier about Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's break-up than Heidi's mom: Jennifer Bunney.

The reason? Because now you've heard of Jennifer Bunney. Unfortunately, you'll be hearing a lot more from her, too. Starting now.

Asked about her pal's split from Spencer, Bunny told Us Weekly that the couple is "going through some issues... I don't think you move in with your friend if your marriage is completely cruising along. If things are great, you don't move out and move in with your friend."

Well, you do if you're an attention-starved fame whore whose relationship with Pratt has run its course in the view of the public and the tabloids.

Over the weekend, Heidi Tweeted that she's gonna have the "best summer of my life," move in with Bunney and film a reality show. What will it focus on? Said Jennifer:

"The show will depict who we really are, without the producers trying to create situations. We want it to be different from The Hills."

Hilariously, Bunney claims to be an aspiring doctor and told the magazine this series will capture "huge turning points" in the lives of her and Montag. Cue pre-written tease!

"Is [Heidi] going to be a single, independent woman or is she going to stay with Spencer? We know fame is fleeting, fame is not going to support us for the rest of our lives. We need to make smart decisions right now."

Some might say Montag has already done so, ditching Pratt. Others might point to the fact that Spencer's reaction to the break-up will be a "big aspect of the show" (according to Bunney) and believe this is all another Speidi-sponsored PR stunt.

On which side to you think THG falls?

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The ongoing Tony Parker birthday celebration continued over the weekend.

For the third time in two weeks, wife Eva Longoria threw her man a party in honor of the Spurs guard turning 28 on May 17. Following bashes in Miami and Los Angeles, the couple graced the red carpet of Eve nightclub in Las Vegas Saturday night.

"I got him a lot of things," the Desperate Housewives star said. "I got him four-wheelers because he wanted a new four-wheeler, and I got him a Microsoft surface computer that he can touch and play with."

If we were Parker, there's only one thing we'd want to touch and play with every night: Eva herself.

Tony and Wife

Parker, who has so much free time because the Spurs lost in the second round of the NBA playoffs, said: "I don’t have a birthday wish list. Whatever she gives me I’m fine with it. I’m happy."

Wondering why? Look at the woman by his side in the photos below:

  • Beautiful Eva
  • Eva on the Red Carpet
  • One Happy Couple
  • Birthday Boy and His Wife
  • Pic of Eva

[Photos: Splash News]

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Just a few weeks ago, fans were concerned that Bret Michaels might not survive a brain hemorrhage.

Now, debate has moved on to a far less important, albeit pop culturally relevant, issue: Should Michaels replace Simon Cowell as a judge on American Idol?

The rocker told concert goers in Mississippi on Friday night that he was being considered for the gig. Now, in an interview with People, the former Poison singer explains why he'd be a great choice, starting with his "old-school, paying-my-dues experience."

“I used to move the pool table out of the way to play for people six nights a week, playing five sets a night, where I had to announce the dinner special. I grew up the old-fashioned way. I would have done anything to have a platform like American Idol when I was growing up," he said.

Recovering Bret

Michaels - whose reality show resume includes judging Nashville Star; sleeping with women on Rock of Love; and winning Celebrity Apprentice - also tells the magazine he can help Idol contestants focus on the big picture.

“For a lot of these young musicians, I’d be able to give them incredibly awesome and very, very real advice. Not just the music, but their attitude and what it’s gonna take. Because everyone forgets one simple thing: Once you get chosen as the winner, you still have a big road ahead.

“I would bring my heart and my soul and amazingly honest and truthful advice. And I would tell them if I thought their chances of making it were really slim - and how to fix that. Because my chances of making it were extremely slim. It’s come from brute determination.”

So, has he sold you? Would Michaels make a quality American Idol judge?

 

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Blame it on the economy, the contrived storylines, the self-centered characters or a lovable green ogre.

But Sex and the City 2 tanked at the box office this weekend, failing to even bump Shrek Forever After from the top spot.

The much-hyped sequal pulled in $32.1 in three days, far below the $56.8 million the original opened with in 2008.

The film, which takes the core four to the Middle East, has received few positive reviews; The New York Times said it "isn't much fun at all," while USA Today slammed it as "tasteless." On Rotten Tomatoes, only 15% of critics polled said they liked the flick.

Tokyo Premiere

THG's take? There are only so many times you can find Samantha's sexual puns witty; while focusing on a quartet of rich, successful, whining women tends to get old.

At this point, the franchise is more about fashion (a lot of which you can find in our Style Store!) than anything else. But is that enough to garner a third film? And would you even wanna see one?

Sound off now, as you check out scenes from Sex and the City 2 below...

Trio of Sex and the City Characters
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