Granted, Bethenny Frankel got married months ago. She's even had a daughter and given an in-depth magazine interview about motherhood since then.
But Bravo took us back in time last night on Bethenny Getting Married and showed us this reality star's wedding to Jason Hoppy. As always, our THG correspondent is here to review the episode in detail...
The wedding day is here! Down at The Four Seasons, wedding planner Shawn is going full-tilt boogie trying to get everything ready. You know he’s serious because he’s wearing a headset and fast walking.
He has that look of extreme fear on his face that has become very familiar to us as we’ve watched him throw this high-end shotgun wedding together whilst being hounded by the pickiest bride on the planet. We know this look most likely won’t go away until he closes the limo door after the wedding and watches Bethenny and Jason drive off into the sunset.
Meanwhile, back at home, Bethenny is getting ready for her wedding and simultaneously editing her new book. She accomplishes the book, to her great relief and then Teri, the Maid of Honor, comes over wearing another really bad shirt. Carol, Jason’s mom, also pops by. She gives Bethenny a very sweet gift of a locket with mini pictures of Bethenny and Jason.
Bethenny promptly pins this locket to her underwear.
Bethenny’s hair and makeup pros arrive to gussy her up. A photography team from Oprah’s magazine is there to document this part of the process. You’ve got to wonder what Jason’s mom is thinking about all this celebrity hoo-ha. If she’s overwhelmed, you’d never know it - she acts very cool.
Outside the Four Seasons are paparazzi and a security team. Once inside, Bethenny is thrilled with how everything looks. “It’s gorgeous. I’m so excited. It’s perfect,” Bethenny sighs. Shawn looks like he expected Bethenny to beat him over the head with a silver serving tray and you know the poor guy must almost be pissing himself with relief that she is not only satisfied, but actually happy!
Elsewhere, Jason is dead-set on having a drank before the blessed event and sends Shawn off on this errand. “Can you believe it’s here?” he asks his Best Man about the wedding day. A second passes in silence.
“Where is Shawn with those drinks?!” Jason asks, his voice tight with anticipation. He wipes his sweaty brow. I can understand why he is so worked up—a new wife, a new reality show, and a new baby all at once. I’d be sweaty and dying to get drunk too.
Behind the scenes, Bethenny is finishing getting ready and putting on her wedding dress. She is convinced that her pregnant belly has grown significantly and terrified the dress won’t fit. Maid of honor Teri attempts to be helpful but seems a little tipsy - or maybe totally smashed.
“Okay,” she slurs to Bethenny, “I have to say something about the Chinese astrological chart.”