Hilton Hater

You can find Noah Cyrus on YouTube.

As for her siblings?

Miley Cyrus has just announced a 45-show North American Tour that will begin on September 14 and feature Metro Station, a band headlined by older brother Trace. Isn't that adorable?

Where and when can you catch Miley in a city near you? Follow this article's jump and find out!

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When rumors of Jon Gosselin's infidelity first came out, his wife (shockingly, we know) had no problem dressing her man down in public.

"Jon is confused and struggling with a lot of different things," she said last month.

In the latest issue of People, though, Jon is a bit more cautious about addressing his marital woes. He's also idiotic when it comes to accusations that he exploits his children by having their every action caught on camera.

"Exploited? I don't even want to use that word, because I think it's ridiculous," he told the magazine.

Jon and Kate Gosselin spend more time on tabloid covers these days than with their children.

Come on, Jon. Criticism from the Octomom? That's ridiculous.

But are you really trying to claim that you can't comprehend why anyone would question your decision to feature every moment of your kids' lives on a TV show?!?

At least come up with a reasonable defense of your actions. If you can pull yourself away from Deanna Hummel for a few minutes, that is.

We think Ali Lohan, at 15, is far too young to be following in her troubled sister's famous footsteps, as the teenager (who looks 37) has made no secret of the fact that she yearns for fame and fortune.

But nine-year old Noah Cyrus, already making YouTube videos, just like her sister Miley? That's truly depressing.

The youngest Cyrus offspring is adorable in the clip below; we just want her to remain that way. If Noah is soon posing seductively for Vanity Fair, we're coming after you, Miley!

Noah Cyrus Video

Looks like Adam Lambert isn't the only American Idol finalist to go public with a new friend this week.

Kris Allen spent May 29 at Disneyworld, serenading Minnie Mouse and putting on a performance for thousands of fans in attendance.

Regarding his victory, the season eight champion told the adoring public: “It feels good, but it hasn’t completely sunk in yet.”

From there, he played his rendition of the Kanye West song “Heartless” and was honored with a celebratory parade through the theme park. Here are pictures from the event. Click on each to enlarge...

Another day, another tabloid reporting on a possible relationship between Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson. (You might wanna turn away right about now, Michael Angarano.)

Following the near-kiss heard around the world at Sunday's MTV Movie Awards, OK! spoke to a friend of Stewart. This anonymous source confirmed that the aforementioned co-stars have always gotten along well.

“Robert and Kristen spent a lot of time alone together when they filmed the first Twilight movie - they’d stay up most of the night talking, laughing, playing music. Although [Robert] knew Kristen had a boyfriend, he made no secret of the fact that he was crazy about her.”

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson in love? Kate Gosselin in a bikini? Susan Boyle in the hospital? It's been quite a week for celebrity gossip!

What about Angarano, the little-known actor Stewart has been linked to for months?

“Kristen and Robert hit it off the minute they were introduced,” the friend says. “When they auditioned together for the first time [in 2007], sparks flew. The  problem is, she’s torn between her onscreen and off-screen loves.”

Of course, anyone that has seen a photo of Robert Pattinson likely can't understand what there is to be torn over. Has Kristen seen his face?!?

They are definitely out now.

A few hours before Adam Lambert showed off his boyfriend to the world - as the American Idol finalist and Drake LaBry held hands outside a club Monday night - the pair posed for pictures during a trip to Kitson Men in Los Angeles.

Adam Lambert and Drake LaBry need a couple's nickname. Might we suggest... LaBry?

The staff at the clothing store said the couple was “really cordial and nice.” Lambert reportedly bought a Marc Jacobs Blazer for LaBry, the very same one he wore out later that night at Guys & Dolls nightclub.

In case we haven't mentioned it before: our staff admires the way Adam handled the issue of his sexuality. He was never ashamed of it, never hid it and didn't feel the need to make a spectacle out of exiting the closet.

He's just been living his life, always remaining true to himself. Props to him for that.

Ready for a klash between the Kardashians?!?

We've already asked viewers who they'd rather sleep with, Kourtney or Kim Kardashian (or Kristin Cavallari).

Now, we're asking you to chime in on a slightly less invasive issue.

Last week, Kourtney celebrated the opening of her new clothing boutique in Miami in her Bebe romper; then, later that week, Kim took a spin in the same coral outfit while rollerblading. See for yourself and then weigh in on the sisters...

Who wears this outfit better?

Might America finally be coming to its senses?

Granted, far too many people still somehow fear that terrorist suspects currently held at Guantanamo Bay would escape from maximum security prisons if held there inside the country.

But at least far fewer people watched this week's installments of Jon & Kate Plus 8. That's a start!

Fueled by ongoing gossip stories about the marriage between Jon and Kate Gosselin, the May 25 premiere of the show attracted a mind-numbing 9.8 millions viewers, earning higher ratings than the season finale of Lost on ABC.

However, the two newest episodes of the series, which aired on Monday, scored only 5.5 million and 6 million viewers, respectively.

That's still far more than we'd like to see, but we can't expect everyone to tune out at once. We can only hope that the prospect of having sex with Kate Gosselin helps turn more people off for next week.

She might not be shopping for her own engagement ring, like Kim Kardashian.

But Vanessa Minnillo is already making plans for one.

In an interview with journalist columnist Robin Leach, the longtime girlfriend of Nick Lachey pointed to a 5-carat ring and said:

"It will be 10 carats when it moves to the fourth finger!"

Minnillo was laughing when she said it... but 10 carats?!? Such a piece of jewelery would weigh more than the breasts of Lachey's ex-wife, Jessica Simpson.

Overall, the former MTV VJ assures her two dozen fans that the "romance is still going strong. There will always be rumblings and rumors that we've broken up, but in fact, it's very much still on – and it keeps on getting better."

Hey, Vanessa, remember when you were caught on camera being railed by your boyfriend? That was funny.

For the record, Kendra Wilkinson does NOT own a stripper pole.

Get your mind out of the gutter, people, and listen to what the former Playmate has to say about the form of exercise pictures below.

“I’m an outdoors girl so it’s hard to find fun ways to exercise in my house that keep me from getting bored,” she writes on a post on her official blog. “I’m like a little monkey and love to swing around on things. So that’s why I decided to create my own line of sports poles which will be coming out soon!”

Wait, we thought Kendra already had a sports pole she could swing around on any time she wanted? Isn't that what fiance Hank Baskett is for?

Click on the photos above to get a closer look at Kendra Wilkinson channeling her inner stripper.