Free Britney

Free Britney

Teaming up with Hilton Hater to bring you the latest celebrity news, Hollywood rumors and gossip since 6/6/06.

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This past weekend meant good times for Hollywood stars in Las Vegas. Even more than usual! The NBA All-Star Game was in town and Akon performed as part of the weekend's festivities.

That concert sounds like the musical equivalent of Britney Spears' new hairdo, if you get what we're saying. What we're saying is, the girl looks terrible with a shaved head.

The Hills Cast in Hawaii

Anyway. Paris Hilton and younger sister Nicky Hilton were on hand. Sadly, there was no raunchy, suggestive Hilton sister girl-on-girl action spotted.

Bachelor-about-town Brody Jenner (white t-shirt) and Paris n'er-do-well BFF Brandon Davis (a.k.a. Greasy Bear) hit up the event as well. It looks as if everyone had a good time looking cool and contributing nothing to society.

 

Also there was Sopranos actress Jamie Lynn Sigler. We have no idea if she is friends with the Hiltons, or trying to ditch the lame guy she's there with in the hopes of winning the affections of Lauren Conrad's hunky man (Jenner).

Or  maybe, just maybe, she simply happened to be in the same place as these other peeps. We had space to kill. Deal with it.

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Let's hope so! She's such an anorexic waif that her clothes barely stay on. Unfortunately for Nicole Richie, they don't issue belts to prisoners.

According to the Associated Press, The Simple Life "actress" was officially charged Friday with a misdemeanor DUI following her awesome December 11 DUI arrest in which she was caught driving the wrong way down the 134 freeway carpool lane in Burbank, Calif.

A Mom Again

Richie later admitted to taking Vicodin and smoking pot. Paris Hilton's BFF had been telling friends she took Vicodin to combat menstrual cramps.

Richie's trouble with the law follows a 2003 guilty plea for heroin use and an arrest for driving with a revoked driver's license. Charges were later dismissed after she successfully completed probation and checked herself into rehab.

This fine mug shot at right followed her most recent arrest. So sexy! For some reason, Joel Madden (with Nicole, pictured) seems interested in tapping that.

Under California law, Richie faces mandatory jail time that could include 90 days to an entire year in jail. Richie's arraignment will take place at L.A. County Superior Court in Glendale, Calif., on February 21.

Fortunately for Nicole, she'll probably be sent to a medium or minimum security facility.

That's no picnic, but to quote Office Space, all you have to do is kick someone's ass the first day, or become someone's bitch.

Then everything will be okay. We're guessing this 85-pound waste will opt for the latter.

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We've shown you the Britney Spears shaved head pics.

Now it's time for the pics of Britney wigging out. Literally!

Britney Concert Photo

Earlier today, we reported that the mother of little Jayden James was already experiencing a case of shear remorse over her bizarre decision to make herself bald. Really, we can't imagine an internationally-known singer and sex symbol would regret such a thing.

Anyway, here are some pics of Britney channeling her inner Marilyn Monroe:

PHOTO CREDIT: MatrixPhotos.com

Despite being married to a wigger for about two years (boo), Britney Spears probably never envisioned herself going down this road.

But at least she can take comfort in the knowledge that several other stars, such as Beyonce, rock the faux hair pretty hard. At the same time, don't look for a bald Britney on the cover of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue anytime soon.

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Yes, it's true! The Jayden James Federline pictures keep coming!

We repeat, there has been another picture of Jayden James Federline!

Jayden James Picks Out Toys

The younger spawn of Britney Spears has been photographed, and we can see at least 50 percent of his face this time! Boy, he's a cute little tyke, that Jayden James. See below...

PHOTO CREDIT: x17online.com

We're not sure about his pink hoodie, but at least Sean Preston's little brother has more hair than his mother, who recently started rocking the shaved head look. It's not attractive.

This is totally the best of all the Jayden James pictures we've come across to date. Hopefully it's a sign of things to come. And by things, we mean more Jayden James pics.

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Moments after shaving her own head in Esther's Haircutting Studio in Tarzana, Calif., a teary-eyed Britney Spears blurted out:

"'My mom is going to freak!'"

Britney Spears, Blender Magazine

Yeah, she's not having a nervous breakdown or anything. We're sure Lynne Spears' opinion matters a lot, given her strong, steadying influence over Brit in the last few months. Really, after you daughter gives the entire world a crotch shot, is a shaved head really going to shock you? And do you care?

Apparently Britney was a little shocked by it herself. After the deed was done, salon owner Esther Tognozzi, who says she tried to talk the future phone sex fiend out of her radical 'do, the troubled pop star was inconsolable.

Spears stopped by the San Fernando Valley salon at around 7 p.m. Friday night after it had closed, Tognozzi tells People Magazine.

Accompanied by her bodyguards, Spears walked in with a hooded sweatshirt covering her head and told Tognozzi, "'I want you to buzz my hair off.'"

Tognozzi first tried to talk Spears out of going through with it, then after refusing the pop star's request, Spears said, "'Then I'll do it.'"

During Spears's visit, which came after news of her short rehab stint broke, Tognozzi describes the pop star as having "no expression."

Kind of how Isaac Cohen described her after having sex with him.

According to TMZ, Jayden James' bald mama is already having a serious case of shaver's remorse - Britney was spotted yesterday hiding her dome with a blonde wig and a cap.

Meanwhile, E! Online reports Britney was lounging poolside at the Mondrian Hotel yesterday afternoon wearing a short blonde hair piece, a green cap, and a mismatched bikini bottom and top.

"It didn't look so hot, and she was smoking cigarette after cigarette," says E! Online's eyewitness.

You could say she's wigging out. We never saw that coming.

Britney clearly needs to heed the words of estranged husband, K-Fed, her V-card recipient, Justin Timberlake, her former personal assistant and everyone else - get help, biatch!

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Tom Brady may have memorized the New England Patriots' playbook. But it looks as though he's failing at God's instruction manual.

Bridget Moynahan Nude

The quarterback broke up with actress Bridget Moynahan last year - but reports are now surfacing that the All-Pro knocked has knocked up his ex-girlfriend.

The pregnancy was first reported by the New York Post columnist Liz Smith.

While Moynahan, who is over three months pregnant, is said to be "healthy and excited," we're not sure how Gisele Bundchen feels about this development.

The actress, a former model who starred in the ABC drama Six Degrees, and the star quarterback, ended their three-year relationship at the end of last year.

This will be the first child for both.

Let's hope it has a brighter future than that of Dannielynn Hope Marshall Stern.

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Well, we can say this, folks: If Britney Spears' comeback doesn't go as planned, she's got a backup career: phone sex operator!

Get ready for this, guys. The troubled pop singer will send you, absolutely free, a sexy, pre-recorded story of your choice from her perfume's site.

Caffeine Fiend

The promotional website for her latest fragrance, Midnight Fantasy, allows visitors to send a personalized voice message from Britney Spears to a friend's phone or e-mail address.

Users can pick activities, gifts and nicknames from a list of pre-recorded words - which come together to make a fantasy. Get it? Fantasy is the name of the perfume.

For instance, you could have a breathy Britney ask you politely if you'd babysit Jayden James while she and Katie Rees hit the town for a night of tequila shots and girl on girl action.

Isaac Cohen, for his part, might have Brit suggest a kinky, all-night sex romp on a rotating bed in a suite with mirrored ceilings. Or something.

Sadly, we're guessing any requests involving Paris Hilton pussy are off-limits.

There are so many directions you could take this. But keep this in mind: with gift options such as a six-pack of beer available, it appears that even Britney's fantasies are trashy.

Just hope you don't get a call from Britney on crystal meth.

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It's like that movie, Win a Date With Tad Hamilton!

We never saw it. But apparently, a cute chick (Kate Bosworth) enters a contest and wins a date with a hunky movie star named Tad Hamilton (Josh Duhamel). Segue forthcoming.

Brody: Shaved Head

Us Weekly is doing something similar with Hollywood's hottest bachelor, 23-year-old Brody Jenner. If you want to accompany The Hills star to a hot Hollywood party in April, you can enter Us' contest using a video stating why you should be Brody's date!

Should you win, you'll be following in the mostly hot, sometimes troubled footsteps of:

Yeah. The guy's a player. Although we cannot figure out why he is famous exactly. Oh well, that hasn't stopped his step-sister, Kim Kardashian.

Entries will not be accepted until March 2, but start creating your submission now, and be sure to check out Brody's video diary (in which he explains what he likes in a gal).

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What does a star in her early 20s shop for in New York City? If you've been following various crotch shot queens of late, you'd probably assume they'd be shopping for some seriously sexy, slutty attire. But not so for Ashley Tisdale.

People Magazine had the pleasure of tagging along with Ashley on her CD release day, February 6, as she perused the racks at Scoop NYC. The girl's a born shopper - almost literally. She was discovered in a mall at age 3.

Speer and Tisdale Stroll

But in a store full of trendy threads, all she wants are sweats. What's more, "I like 'em baggy," she says. It nice to see that some stars, such as Ashley and Lauren Conrad, believe that more coverage can be sexy when it comes to clothes.

But the High School Musical star is not entirely innocent, guys. Interestingly, the first single of her new album is intriguingly titled, "He Said, She Said."

What's more, the track is written and produced by J.R. Rotem, the one-night fling of Britney Spears and a guy who personifies Andy Warhol's classic "15 minutes of fame" theory.

He's also worked with the blonde, singing likes of Paris Hilton and Hayden Panettiere, among others, on their respective albums.

With a resume like that, you know this is gonna be good! Well, at least 1,000 times better than anything Ashlee Simpson has never "sang."

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Despite denials and protests, J.Lo is moving closer to Scientology.

Sources say that as recently as December, Jennifer Lopez and her husband, Marc Anthony, were taking professional business meetings at Scientology's Celebrity Center in Hollywood.

Jennifer Lopez Photograph

Anthony is said to have taken the "purification" course, a hopped-up sauna that the Cult Church of Scientology says "cures" all ills.

Lopez may have invested big buck$ her soul in the IRS-sanctioned religion thanks to infertility issues and difficulties in the couple's marriage.

What's clear is that Lopez and Anthony's sudden friendship with chief celebrity Scientology freak leader Tom Cruise is no accident. Other than belonging to the expensive, pay-as-you-go religion, Cruise and the Lopez-Anthonys would have nothing in common.

We're also told Lopez and Anthony entered Scientology with help from Angelo Pagan, the husband of King of Queens actress Leah Remini. Both Pagan and Remini have taken dozens of pricey courses in L. Ron Hubbard's creation.

This would also account as well for Remini's sudden entry into the Cruise inner circle, as witnessed by her appearance at Cruise's wedding with Katie Holmes outside Rome.

Scary stuff. Add to this group newly arrived U.K. celebs David Beckham and Victoria Beckham, and you've got a certifiable, star-studded collection of freaks.

Not to mention huge breasts, in the case of the latter.

Lopez confided in at least one friend that she "would do anything" to help her marriage. Sadly, among the couple's problems has been infertility. At 36 and with a strong desire to become a mother, J.Lo is growing impatient.

Through three marriages (Anthony, Cris Judd and Ojani Noa) and two other long-term, public relationships (Diddy and Ben Affleck), no knocking up of Jennifer has taken place - and that's a list of prospective baby daddies almost as long as the one Anna Nicole Smith was juggling!

Okay, not that long.

Scientology is notable for recruiting stars at low points in their careers or personal lives, preying on uncertainty, instability or just plain fear by promising to fix life issues. Looks like they just snared a big fish.

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