Free Britney

Free Britney

Teaming up with Hilton Hater to bring you the latest celebrity news, Hollywood rumors and gossip since 6/6/06.

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No, we're not talking about the MTV reality show on which she co-stars.

We're talking about two parts of her anatomy, if you know what we mean.

Corey Bohan and Audrina Patridge Pic

What we're driving at here is that Audrina Patridge's breasts are not small.

The aspiring actress took a dip over the weekend at the DKNY Jeans beach house in Malibu, and boy, The Hills were alive with ... something.

As you ogle away, tell us, readers: Are Audrina's boobs are real or fake?

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Love is indeed a losing game. Or one you have to wait 27 months for.

Amy Winehouse will have to smuggle heroin into prison in her beehive for two-plus years after Blake Fielder-Civil was sentenced today for beating up a pub manager, then offering him $400,000 to conveniently not show up at trial.

Blake Fielder-Civil's sentence includes 15 months for unlawful wounding of the man and 12 months for his perverting the course of justice. Really.

He's already served close to nine months whilst awaiting trial, making it effectively a three-year sentence. Better hope for conjugal visits, Blake.

Blake Fielder-Civil Mug Shot

This Blake Fielder-Civil mug shot is an oldie but goodie.

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Apparently still trying to sing, Jessica Simpson made her country debut at the musical festival and, well, according to the The Kenosha News ...

"She's an embarrassment to country music," said one member of the audience, who was apparently surprised. "It's crap. She doesn't belong here."

Or anywhere near a microphone or TV camera ever again. Still photos are still okay, though, because then you can focus your attention here.

Luckily for Jessica, she had her two remaining fans on hand.

That's right, her bitches Tony Romo and Daisy.

Both of whom have no playoff wins. Just saying.

Jessica Simpson's an embarrassment to music, but her (two) fans love her.

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Just kidding. But you have to admit, very few stars look so darn cute even when standing in line at LAX airport on a Sunday afternoon.

The Hills star wheeled her own luggage to the check-in desk, dressed in a purple hooded sweater pulled over her head, and sunglasses.

Minka Kelly Emmys Dress

Basically, Lauren Conrad wears to the airport what Katie Holmes wears, oh, all the time! Isn't she just the best? See below ...

The Hills' Lauren Conrad rolls - stylishly - through security.

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Ah, Katie Holmes fashion. It's like Wal-Mart chic.

The actress takes a casual approach in trouser pants, a navy button-down shirt and sensible loafers as she left the set of Eli Stone in L.A.

Rihanna in Vogue

That's as nice as we can put it.

We recognize that you can let yourself go a little when married, but seriously, does anyone remember when Katie Holmes used to be hot?

Katie Holmes' casual fashion: Love it or shove it?

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Amy Winehouse was out with friends last night. Why? Because that's what she does. She gets trashed. Whenever she can. But specifically this time, she may have been pre-gaming for the impending release of Blake Fielder-Civil.

It's not a guarantee. He receives his sentence today and given the charges against him, a judge could sentence him to five years or so in the slammer. However, he could also be let off with time served and probation.

Toweling Off

Blake's mom, Georgette Fielder-Civil, begged the judge to set him free - but to send him home with them and not A-Dubs, the News of the World reports:

"I'm dreading it because I don't want him to go straight back to Amy. If he goes it could be a death sentence for the two of them. Blake thinks he's going to be Amy's saviour and has every intention to try to stop the drugs. But Amy is completely unstable. Blake is a recovering drug addict and he's not strong enough to resist the temptation. If they are reunited, I know they will be back on drugs within days."

Well, that's a fair assessment.

Mrs. Fielder-Civil thinks that if he goes back to Winehouse, they will both overdose. She wants Amy to go back to rehab - and stay there - ASAP.

"She needs to prove that she loves him enough to stop. Then, once they are both drugs-free, they can have a real future together."

Amy's father, Mitch Winehouse, said that Blake Fielder-Civil needs to go straight into rehab after he's released. Blame game, anyone?

Will Blake be set free or stay in jail? Will he go back to Amy or to Melissa Goldstone? We can only wait and see. We can only wait and see.

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With her divorce settlement behind her, Britney Spears took time out on Saturday night to do something for the kids.

Not just Sean Preston and Jayden James, but all kids.

Britney Spears, Gun

Britney attended Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey's fundraiser for Generation Rescue, an organization dedicated to researching autism.

"She looked great and seemed really happy," says a partygoer of the shindig at the couple's home in Brentwood.

Though she kept close to her assistant Brett and didn't speak to other guests, "She smiled and clapped during the video about autism."

"She was very into the information and watched a little bit of the dancers from Dancing with the Stars, sneaking out during one of the performances."

Also at the bash were newlyweds Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller, but the real stars were hosts McCarthy and Carrey.

"Jenny and Jim were adorable," says the guest,

"She kept saying, 'I love you honey' to him when she thanked him from the stage." Not to be outdone by the Dancing With the Stars folks, Jim took to the dance floor, even challenging another guest to a playful dance-off."

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Welcome, celebrity gossip fans and readers, to The Hollywood Gossip Caption Contest, a fun Friday tradition.

This week's Caption Contest was a good one. We like to think they all are, but we particularly liked this celeb pic.

It featured possible lesbians Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson (below). Whose caption won? We chose car.

Congrats! The winning entry appears below the photo, with the full list of submissions appearing down the page.

"Back off girls... she's so hot you might get burned!"

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A pair of Gossip Girl stars - Chace Crawford and Kristen Bell, the unseen narrator of the CW series - celebrate their birthdays today. Woo hoo!

The hunky Chace Crawford is just 23, while the adorable Kristen Bell (who also stars on Heroes, another favorite show of our staff's) turns 28.

In honor of July 18, here are some photos of each these celebrities. Yup, a l'il somethin' for the guys and for the ladies today. Click to enlarge!

When does your favorite star celebrate surviving another year on this planet they call Earth? Check our celebrity birthdays calendar and see!

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On the same morning in which we confirmed that Ben Affleck got Jennifer Garner pregnant again, we've learned that Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are expecting a baby girl on October 31 - and the excited daddy-to-be is already sewing clothes!

"Ashlee and Pete are on cloud nine," an insider told Star.

They actually conceived the baby just before Valentine's Day while they were on vacation and the baby has an initial due date of October 31.

The source says when Pete heard she might have the baby on Halloween, "he went nuts. For an emo-rocker type like Pete, that would be just too perfect!"

So true, so true. Expect Jessica Simpson to pull the goalie on Tony Romo, Bridget Moynahan style, in an attempt to steal the spotlight back from her sis.

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