Free Britney

A cowgirl version of Britney Spears, still apparently wearing no pants, hit the dance studio again yesterday, accompanied by her traveling staff and her two favorite li'l cowboys - 19-month-old Sean Preston and 7-month-old Jayden James.

We think.

While one of Britney Spears' female assistants held Sean Preston on the way out of her big workout, another member of her entourage can be seen lugging a carrier that appears to have a baby's arm sticking out of it.

PHOTO CREDIT: TMZ / FlyNet Online

Britney's second child with Kevin Federline was born in September. But the only Jayden James photos seen by the public thus far have been obscured, partial or grainy as hell.

While Suri Cruise celebrates her birthday and seems perfectly comfortable in front of the camera, this celebrity baby remains shrouded in mystery. But for how long!!??!

A day after his baked bean assault on a member of the paparazzi, the great Hugh Grant was leaving his home in London when he received the "full moon" treatment from an admirer.

The former beau of Elizabeth Hurley was spotted the other day in one of his finer moments, throwing food at a cameraman. From the look on Hugh Grant's face, this fan is either a huge fan of his work, or the magical fruit.

No word on whether any sappy Love Actually quotes were uttered at Grant by the fellow London resident as he proudly showcased his rotund ass cheeks.

Regarding other famous folks we think should get the full moon treatment, Nicole Richie gets the vote of our celebrity gossip writers. The anorexic waif deserves to see some crack that doesn't involve a pipe, don't you think?

Finally! A spacious estate that can accommodate both Victoria Beckham's huge breasts, a growing family and David Beckham nude walking around.

The Beckhams have finally found the house they will live in when they move to Los Angeles in the summer, our celebrity gossip spies have learned.

The multimillion-dollar mansion is "modern, airy, very light and spacious with lots of windows," a source close to the couple says, adding: "It still needs a bit of work inside."

The sale is close to being finalized, says the source:

"Victoria will land in L.A. on Saturday to sign the contract. She will meet with interior designers, discuss fixtures and all aspects of the house plan before flying out shortly afterwards."

A family friend confirms the deal. "It is done. They've found the perfect property for themselves in Beverly Hills," says the friend.

"The house they've chosen is big but not huge. That said, it is big enough for them as a family of five, along with space for family members that will visit from Britain. They needed a fair amount of extra room for visitors as [guests] will stay a while longer than [they did during] visits to them in Spain."

Victoria Beckham has made numerous trips to California since it was announced on January 11 that David, who turns 32 on Wednesday, had signed on to play for the L.A. Galaxy.

The Beckhams - parents to sons Brooklyn, 8, Romeo, 4, and Cruz, 2 - had struggled to find a home in Los Angeles as sellers raised prices when they learned they were interested.

Now that they've found the right place, as well as a school for their sons, the former Posh Spice and her hubby are relieved says the family friend:

"They have been able to finally sort out the house and school. Now they can rest easy for when they arrive. They will crack open the champagne."

David Beckham, whose deal with the L.A. Galaxy is expected to be worth up to $250 million including endorsements, currently plays for Real Madrid in Spain. He and Victoria are expected to sell their Spanish home but keep their sprawling mansion - dubbed Beckingham Palace - north of London.

"There's no way they will sell that place," says a family friend. "They are part of the community there and it will be their base when they go back to Britain for Christmas and things like that."

The family is expected to move in mid-July, around the same time that Victoria's six-part reality TV show appears on NBC.

From the way Indian authorities are treating him, you'd think Richard Gere ran somebody off the road, Brandy-style, or starred in a dirty, amateur sex tape like Brandy's bro, Ray J.

But Richard Gere is defending himself after an absurd warrant was issued for his arrest for giving an Indian actress a kiss that a local judge deemed "indecent."

"Kissing the girl on the cheek was nothing," Richard Gere, 57, said on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart Thursday.

"It was an AIDS event for truck drivers. It was the largest truck depot in South Asia. They were climbing on their trucks [cheering]."

During the public HIV-awareness event in New Delhi earlier this month, Gere took actress Shilpa Shetty, 31, in his arms, kissed her several times on the cheek and dipped her in a tango-style dance move.

Indians in several cities protested and burned effigies of Gere, saying the kiss was an "indecent" act and "against Indian culture," and on Thursday, Judge Dinesh Gupta issued a warrant for his arrest in the city of Jaipur, acting on a petition by a local lawyer.

Gere, who was on the Comedy Central show to promote his latest film, The Hoax, added that Shilpa Shetty herself wasn't offended by the kiss:

"We went and had dinner afterwards and nobody said a word about this."

Wonder if they talked about the weather, the food at the restaurant, or the love life of Shetty's fellow Bollywood star, Aishwarya Rai.

The actor, a frequent visitor to India, where he's met with exiled Tibetan spiritual leader the Dalai Lama through his foundation. On Thursday, he hinted that the kiss controversy is politically motivated.

"There is a very small right-wing conservative party and they are the moral police in India and they do this quite often," said Gere, who has long fought for AIDS awareness in the world's second most populous country.

Still, the actor appeared unfazed by the arrest warrant.

"I don't know if anyone has gone to jail, but [a case like this generally] goes to a reputable court and is thrown out," Richard Gere said.

Still no comment on the whole gerbil thing.

Where the hell has Dharma been for the last 10 years?

Evidently, practicing some serious Scientology.

So it's no surprise that Jenna Elfman is shooting down reports that the marriage of her friend, Tom Cruise, is unstable.

"Honestly, they're happy," Elfman, 35, said of TomKat at Thursday's Healthy Child Healthy World benefit in Santa Monica.

"They have a great life and they love each other. For some reason, the media cannot experience that. They must put in things other than the simplicity of it."

Several recent tabloid stories have alleged that Katie Holmes has been living in a "prison-like" environment and that Cruise is pushing her hard to adopt his many spiritual beliefs.

Elfman, who attended the couple's lavish wedding in Italy in November, says such stories are pure crap.

"It's totally irrelevant, because it's so absolutely not that. It's hard to give a detailed explanation on something that's simple. Honestly, do any of you have a great boyfriend or girlfriend? It's not a big deal, right? You have fun hanging out, and you like talking and sharing your ideas. It's exciting. That's their relationship."

Cruise and Katie Holmes have been spending time in Louisiana lately while Katie films the comedy, Mad Money, with Queen Latifah and Diane Keaton.

Last week, they threw a first birthday party for daughter Suri Cruise at their Los Angeles home, welcoming many friends including Brooke Shields.

Jenna Elfman is herself seven months pregnant with her first child with husband Bodhi, 37, and tells People she's hoping the give birth naturally.

"Bodies have been giving birth for a really long time," she said. "I want to know what it's like to go through that process. I'm just going to be as focused and patient as I can be."

Well we're happy for her. Add Elfman to the list of random celebrities to defend Tom Cruise in the last few months. Leah Remini, you've got company.

Move over, Hilary Duff.

You're not the only one with a stalker in town.

The Hollywood Gossip has learned the full details behind the insane stalking that allegedly took place last weekend, in which a crazy lady attempted to harm Sandra Bullock and her husband, Jesse James at their home in Orange County, Calf.

Orange County Sheriff's spokesman Jim Amormino tells Us Weekly:

"On several occasions before this incident [the actress and her husband] found [Marcia Valentine] lying in front of their garage door. On [the morning of] Sunday, April 22 around 10:30 a.m., Jesse James went out and asked her to leave."

"She yelled some obscenities at James, who did not have a cell phone in his hand. When she saw that he did not have a phone, she went to her car. She threw the car in reverse in his direction. He attempted to move out of the way and she kept moving the vehicle. She attempted to run him over 3-4 times. She then drove off on Pacific Coast Highway."

"James called police and told them that he did not know this woman. He then gave them a detailed description [of her] to the police - she drove a silver Mercedes with a white decal on the rear. He described her as a 5'4 white female."

According to Amormino, Jesse James later picked Valentine out of a line-up after she was captured and arrested after she was pulled over by police.

"We searched the area at the time of the incident, but did not locate her. The next morning, we searched the area and spotted her car. We pulled the vehicle over and called James, who then did an in-field lineup where he positively identified her."

"The case was sent over to the Orange County D.A.'s office where Marcia Valentine might be facing other charges besides assault with a deadly weapon. Bail was set at $25,000 and she bailed out. She lives in nearby Huntington Beach and she due back on May 22."

Unlike the crazy lady who stalks both John Cusack and Tom Cruise, or the wackjob who harrassed Bullock last year, Valentine has no previous police record and has no other restraining orders against her in Los Angeles County.

We're glad Sandra Bullock and her husband are alright. But on a lighter note, THIS is how you stalk, people! No emails or crank calls - but LIVE harassment culminating multiple attempts to run over the husband of your target!

Maksim Miakovsky, take note.

Heck, we haven't seen Bullock involved in this much reckless driving since she starred in Speed. Keanu Reeves? Rolling over in grave.

The amazing Britney Spears showed up at a tanning salon in Beverly Hills today looking better than ever. Okay, not entirely. Okay, not at all. Check out the pop princess' ridiculous getup:

We're starting to wonder if she's lost her marbles as well as any sort of fashion sense. Who the hell goes out in public dressed like this?

Just when we thought laughing at a Kevin Federline music video was as much fun as we were going to have all day, Britney one-ups FedEx yet again. No wonder Jayden James is never seen out in public with mom. Would you want to be?

Let's run down Britney Spears' "look," shall we?

• Ratty brown wig
• No bra
• Pre-school style jumper
• Motel 6 gift shop straw hat
• Elvis sunglasses
• No pants
• Bag big enough for Sean Preston
• Hello Kitty keychain

Yeah. Maybe Suge Knight is right and Britney really is an underdog. One who shops at a thrift store.

Man, and we thought the fashion police had their hands full with Molly Sims.

British readers of FHM recently voted Hayden Panettiere #6 on their Sexiest Women Alive list... despite the fact that the Heroes actress is only 17.

Sure, she's cute, and her TV cheerleader uniform begs for attention. But placing an underage starlet high on what essentially is a "what chicks do you most want to see involved in some tawdry, possibly nude girl-on-girl action" list seems a little weird, doesn't it?

After all, she's not of legal age for another 116 days and 9 hours. We're guessing. Really.

We'd love to get Stephen Colletti's thoughts on the matter. The former star of MTV's Laguna Beach (and boyfriend of the even hotter, and more legal Kristin Cavallari) has been dating Hayden since last year.

We're sure Hayden has great brains and personality, but what's it like knowing you can't legally hit that, Steve?

Hayden can at least take solace that she beat her nemesis Lindsay Lohan on the list... and that she isn't getting punked... at least we don't think she is.

And maybe we should give the Brits a break. Apparently, the age for legal content in the UK is 16. So this post is pretty much pointless.

Oh well, at least you got to see another Hayden Panettiere photo, right?

At our weekly staff meeting this morning, the celebrity gossip writers at The Hollywood Gossip collectively decided that we don't ridicule Kevin Federline enough.

That may seem hard to believe, but since Britney Spears went bonkers, we've been forced to laud K-Fed's efforts as a father and focus on what a decent fellow he really is at heart.

But that doesn't mean we can't continue to mock his music "career." Anyone even remember when he was trying to be a rapper? His first performance told it all, it seems. Predictably, it was a short-lived venture. One replete with awful music.

We bring this up not only because K-Fed's entry into the music biz is unintentional comedy at its best, but because we've learned that the one and only Spencer Pratt (yes, the Devil himself) has a cameo in his music video for "Lose Control."

Here's the video for "Lose Control," as rapped by the self-proclaimed America's Most Hated. Laugh, enjoy, and look for Spencer Pratt - another guy America has come to love to hate (on The Hills) - around the 49-second mark.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atLJ2BxGIkE[/youtube]

Special thanks to RealityTVScoop.com for the tip about Spencer Pratt appearing in this masterful, legendary work of hip-hop art.

As celebrity gossip goes, this is amusing.

As celebrity arrests go, it's contending with Eve for today's best.

Hugh Grant was arrested for throwing a container of baked beans at a paparazzi member... who also alleges that Hugh kicked him and stated he hopes his children die of cancer.

It all started when the photographer was in a London neighborhood trying to take photos of Elizabeth Hurley. She lives near Hugh, and they're on good terms even though they're broken up and she's married to Arun Nayar.

When Hugh showed up at her place one recent afternoon, the photographed asked him to smile for the cameras and that's when he freaked out.

Grant was arrested and taken to the police station for questioning.

He was later released. While there's little doubt that the bean-hucking incident took place (see photo), Grant's rep said that the Love Actually star didn't make those comments about the photographer's children.

Baked beans... that's a new one. At least he didn't use an umbrella. Maybe he and fellow food-thrower Pete Doherty can get together and cook up a nice meal.