Free Britney

Free Britney

Teaming up with Hilton Hater to bring you the latest celebrity news, Hollywood rumors and gossip since 6/6/06.

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Calling Courtney Love insane is like calling Jersey Shore trashy, The Bachelor fake, Tila Tequila a publicity whore, or Robert Pattinson a hunk. It goes without saying.

Just the same, certain entertaining topics are worth revisiting.

Amanda Bynes Twit Pic

Having returned to Twitter and posted topless photos of herself inexplicably this week, Courtney is now lashing out against the custody situation with her daughter.

Frances Bean Cobain, 17, is now in the custody of her grandmother, Kurt Cobain's mom. The reasons are a bit unclear, but Love's abusive behavior is a good guess.

The former Hole lead singer now insists, via Twitter of course, that "all this s--t with the bean needs to be exposed for what it is right f--king NOW enough."

Well put.

This woman needs a psychiatrist and sedatives, ASAP.

"they sqUEESED MY BANK ACCOUNTS so that they were frozen," Love claims, "because they know im going to sue the holy s--t out of them and now are…crocodiling my kid whose better than this seriously she was raised too well to be bought."

The targets of Courtney's Tweeting wrath, at least the parts that make sense, are Frances' grandma, Kimberly Dawn Cobain, and her aunt Wendy O'Connor.

The late Kurt Cobain's mom and sister have a temporary restraining order (until a hearing January 22) barring Love from contacting Frances Bean Cobain.

Suffice it to say, Courtney is not pleased with this.

"Well shes a 'ward of the court' now have fun with that one and im severely lonely without my best friend and no am not on drugs BTW," Love ranted.

"she doesnt understand the peril she has put herself into or that im not mad at her just really dissapointed shed betray me or her father. i just lost the house i wanted cos they think im on drugs and worse, really gnarly s--t!"

Couldn't have said it better ourselves.

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A New York University Law student recently had and pursued a brilliant idea - bring Nicole Polizzi (a.k.a. Snooki from the Jersey Shore cast) to a party at NYU.

For the low, low price of $2,000, the students learned from celebrity gossip blogger Perez Hilton that they could book a night to chill and party with Snookers.

Snooki, Jionni LaValle

Unfortunately, Perez unearthing that tidbit quickly caused her price to go up. Her booking fee rose to $5,000 the next week. The Situation commands $7,500.

The student first hatched the plan December 23. Since then, Snooki’s appearance fee skyrocketed well out of the NYU Law students' broke, academic league.

For $10,000, this could be yours for the night. That's right, you have to pay Nicole Polizzi that to get her to hang out. She should be paying you for such torture.

Snooki now commands serious dough - five figures - to do whatever it is she does. Namely wear unattractive outfits, get drunk and try to hook up with strangers.

Ones who may or may not knock her ass out at some point.

We're read a lot of crazy stuff, but this may take the cake. Ten thousand dollars for a guidette troll to act annoying and probably puke on the floor at 2 a.m.

If you're into that, it's not hard to find for free many a local watering hole. Being smart, the NYU crowd passed on Snooki. But you know someone will pay it.

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Generally, Heidi Montag lets her mouth and body run wild. There is very little in the way of publicity that The Hills star would ever shun or consider a negative thing.

But when photos of her topless were thought to have been unaccounted for - potentially jeopardizing a bigger deal for her to sell them - that meant panic mode!

Twirlin'

In November, her assistant lost a camera containing Heidi Montag plastic surgery pics as Heidi was being transported from the hospital where she got implants.

After Heidi was dropped off at a private recovery center, her assistant realized a camera containing many photos - mostly showing a topless Heidi - was M.I.A.

Sources say the assistant called in a red alert to the ambulance after it left the recovery center and ordered the driver to turn around, but she didn't say why.

In the end, Heidi got her camera back, and one of the photos is featured in this week's People ...we're guessing for a lot of $$$. That's how Spencer Pratt rolls.

Speidi? Lost photo ops? Panic! [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

In other Heidi news, she walked into her house Wednesday with her face concealed, so photos of her newly enhanced (?) face would be unveiled by People first.

Police were summoned with a report of a possible kidnapping.

After officers arrived in force – and briefly detained one of husband Spencer Pratt's employees – the misunderstanding was cleared up. We know you were worried.

"We're grateful this was only a false alarm and I just had my pink Hermes scarf over me," Montag said. "A neighbor was concerned and notified the police."

We're thankful to the LAPD for making sure we were safe."

Amazingly, this did not appear to be staged, a la Tila Tequila's relationship with Casey Johnson. Even Speidi has some standards, people. Not a lot, but some.

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There are so many Tiger Woods mistresses coming out of the woodwork that the situation is quickly getting outta control. What can he do to keep 'em quiet?

Pay $3 million, as he reportedly did in the case of Rachel Uchitel. Or in the case of this new computer game, drive golf balls at them to knock 'em out cold!

Tiger Woods Playing Golf

In this hilarious flash game, you can help Tiger make sure no mistresses talk to the media by hitting them with golf balls before they can get to a news van.

That's right, when Tiger's back is against the wall, there's only one tool for the job. We're talking about a golf club. The game can be said for Elin Woods!

Click here to see if you can get Tiger out from the stickiest of PR situations before the rumors get out - and raging Elin knocks face in with a 9-iron again.

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Gilbert Arenas has been spending his indefinite suspension from the NBA on the phone with his lawyer, who has supposedly been bargaining for a plea deal.

Arenas would supposedly admit guilt to misdemeanor gun charges under the terms of the agreement. No deal had been made as of yesterday afternoon.

If the negotiations don't totally fall apart, they would likely keep Arenas out of prison, according to the Washington Post, and possibly give him probation.

He could also receive community service, and/or a fine.

Whatever happens with the legal system, it isn't looking very good for Gilbert Arenas to suit up with the Washington Wizards right now or anytime soon. Or at all.

GM Ernie Grunfeld supposedly texted Arenas after his "joke" gun drawing on Javaris Crittenton went completely awry to let him know that was in violation of NBA rules.

It could also lead to his $111 million contract being voided. Yikes. The team has supposedly been very cooperative with police investigating the star player.

At least with his copious free time Agent Zero could be cleaning out all the firearms he supposedly owns. Dude supposedly has hundreds of guns. No joke!

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Our crush on Kristin Cavallari has waned a little since her time as the resident bad girl babe on Laguna Beach. On the plus side, she is at least of legal age now.

She feuded with Lauren Conrad on that MTV series, then recently took her place when LC retired from her Laguna spinoff. Kristin last season? A little much.

Still, she remains a very cute girl. We maintain there is no way in hell Kristin Cavallari would ever date Justin-Bobby. We have no point, we're just saying.

Here's a 22-photo tribute to The Hills star on her 22nd birthday...

  • Bad Kristin
  • The Bitch Be Back
  • Kristin in White
  • K-to-the-C

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The Bachelor craze needs to simmer down a bit.

Oxygen has announced that Charlie O'Connell and Sarah Brice from ABC's dating show are now getting their own reality series titled When Charlie Met Sarah.

All together now: Huh?!

This series "takes viewers back to when Charlie O'Connell appeared on The Bachelor and decided Sarah was the one to end his single days," a release says.

"Since then, their relationship has been on and off due to Charlie's hard-partying ways. Now, they've reconnected and want to make it work for REAL."

Because we're all sitting here dying to know every detail about The Bachelor couple from... 2005. Why don't they just appear on Bachelor Pad instead?

Charlie O'Connell, Sarah Brice

The conflict will reportedly center around O'Connell's reluctance to get engaged to Sarah Brice. Guess he didn't keep that enormous rock from their Bachelor daze.

Maybe they can get Chris Harrison to host this. Now that would be worth watching. Sarah ... that was the final kiss tonight. Whenever you're ready ... for bed.

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Renowned punk rocker Jay Reatard, real name Jimmie Lee Lindsey, was found dead in his Memphis home early yesterday, according to friends. He was 29.

He died in his sleep, according to the Memphis Commercial Appeal.

Goner Records, which has released a number of Jay's singles and EPs, posted the following statement to its official site on Wednesday afternoon:

"It is with great sadness that we report the passing of our good friend Jay Reatard. Jay was as full of life as anyone we have ever met, and he was responsible for so many memorable moments as a person and artist."

"We’re honored to have known him, and we will miss him terribly."

R.I.P. Jay Reatard (1980-2010).

Known for his energy, prolific output and outlandish stage behavior, Jay Reatard recently released his newest album, Watch Me Fall, to critical acclaim in August.

He will be missed!

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We hope you're sitting down. This may come as a shock, but sources close to Casey Johnson say her relationship with Tila Tequila was just a huge publicity stunt.

This came from Casey's own mouth in the weeks before her tragic death last week, according to two of the late Johnson & Johnson heiress' friends cited by TMZ.

Bisexual

The friends came forward today and said that they each received separate calls from Casey Johnson saying her engagement to Tila Tequila was "all for show."

Casey told them she met her only three days before the infamous engagement video and made it very clear to both that she and Tila were not together.

May Casey Johnson rest in peace. May Tila Tequila go away forever.

Oddly enough, one of the friends even says Tila was in the room when Casey made the calls. We don't know if this makes Tila's recent actions better or worse.

The publicity whore has been Twittering up a storm, effectively play the grieving victim, elicit sympathy and milking Johnson's death for everything it's worth.

Fake mourning your fake fiancee for a 16th minute of fame? Even pretending to be on suicide watch? That's a new low, even for the lowest form of life on earth.

Tila is now saying she wants custody of Casey's daughter too. Not that she was ever married to Johnson or has legal standing ... but why let that stop you?

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Free of her hideous reverse mullet and even more revolting husband, Kate Gosselin is set to return to TV later this year in a brand new TLC series of her very own.

According to reports, Kate will be "trying different jobs and tasks and showing how she performs in different environments" on the upcoming as-yet-untitled show.

Hmm. Pretty sure that was the synopsis of New York Goes to Work.

Only Tiffany Pollard is more entertaining. Who wants to see a grating nag work at McDonalds? Don't you have to have some appeal to make that worth watching?

Sorry, but no hair extensions can alter that personality.

This is what we imagine Kate's new show will be like.

TLC has not confirmed plans for the show, which sources say is slated to start in late spring or early summer, but is in talks to put Kate back on TV for some reason.

Plans for a Kate Gosselin talk show, conceptualized as a new take on The View for working moms, were mercifully scrapped last month after execs weren't thrilled.

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