When Gwyneth Paltrow ends a relationship, she doesn’t drown her sorrows in a bottle of pinot grigio or a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. No, that’s peasant stuff.
Gwyneth "consciously uncouples" from her victims exes and then becomes their BFF in order to keep them from ever getting laid again make sure the experience is as healthy as possible for everyone involved.
Shortly after the slow, painful Band-Aid removal that was her split from Chris Martin, Paltrow began dating Brad Falchuk.
Now, Radar Online is reporting that Falchuk has dumped Paltrow, but rather than giving into her rage like some peon that makes half-a-million a year, Gwyneth has rebounded by declaring herself the house mother of Taylor Swift’s ever-expanding sorority:
Gwinnie posted the above photo yesterday and gave a shout-out to Swifty for treating her to an awesome "date night."
(That’s Gwyneth’s son, Moses, being pushed out of the frame in the bottom right corner.)
Insiders say Gwyneth has a new lease on life following her latest breakup and she just wants to party with her gal pals, a la Taylor.
“She just wants to go out and play the field a bit,” says the source. “She doesn’t want to be tied down to anyone, or anything, in particular right now.”
We don’t want to be the ones to tell Gwyneth that Taylor is 17 years her junior and actually has a serious boyfriend, but maybe the shaman who rubs hot stones on her back in the morning or her professional vagina steam cleaner will pass the message along.