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After more than a year of spewing “conscious uncoupling” psycho-babble and openly banging other people, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin are officially divorced.

TMZ reports that the final papers were signed Monday afternoon, and the Goop Goddess and Coldplay frontman are finally free to roam the terrestrial plane in search of other spirits to commune with, as Gwyneth probably put it.

The timing couldn’t be better, as Martin has been sleeping with Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Hudson and roughly 98% of the single actresses in Hollywood.

Paltrow, of course, has entered into a relationship with a steam-cleaning attachment.

We kid. She’s rumored to be dating Glee producer Brad Falchuk. That said, Gwyneth totally steams her vagina, but that’s a story for another time.

The Paltrow-Martins have remained bafflingly close throughout their separation, but hey, it seems to work for them, and we’re sure it’s good for their two kids, so no judgment here.

Don’t get us wrong; we’ll happily judge Gwyneth for the steam-powered vadge and for cheating on the Food Stamp Challenge, but to her credit, she actually pulled off one of the few amicable divorces in Hollywood history.

So yeah, we’re begrudgingly offering kudos to the newly-single Ms. Goop. We’d congratulate Martin too, but he gets to bang Jennifer Lawrence now, and that’s reward enough.