This week on The Real Housewives of Orange County, Shannon and David Beador took relationship advice from...Brooks and Vicki.
Yes, oh yes. The woman who had to "make her life private" to keep her friends out of her relationship with Brooks the Leech is dishing out advice. It's actually pretty good advice, too.
Shannon needs to stop needling David. Can she do it? Will Mexico be the place where the Beador marriage takes a turn for the better?
Chances are...not high. After all, tequila is involved.
Shannon and David are packing for their trip to Mexico. At home they seem to be in a better place, or at least that they're trying to be in a better place.
They actually touch each other and talk about how excited they are to be going away together. It's a nice change from their constant bickering and frequent barbs tossed in each other's general direction.
Too bad it doesn't last.
Heather has hired a personal chef to come in to cook for the family. She hates to cook and isn't very good at it and she's woman enough to admit it. You go, Heather Dubrow!
The kids love it and sit down to a meal of roasted chicken with cranberry sauce glaze and vegetables. If the secret to getting kids to eat vegetables is to hire a personal chef, then Ima need Nelse's phone number and hourly rates.
What's funny about Heather hiring a personal chef is that Lizzie looks up to Heather as someone who seems to have it all. The two sit down and Lizzie picks Heather's brain about how she does it.
Lizzie wants a third baby. And she wants her company. And she wants to do the things she loves to do. She's headed for a breakdown if she can't get a handle on all of these things she wants.
Heather tells her to table the baby talk for now since there's no reason she needs to have a third baby right this minute. Lizzie needs to get Christian on board with helping out around the house and with the kids before they bring another baby into the mix.
Speaking of babies, Tamra and Eddie's parenting adventures with little Astro the robot are going about as well as all of us expected. Eddie's doing absolutely nothing to help with the baby and everything's on Tamra.
He tells her this was her experiment so he'll spend time with the baby when he has time to spend with the baby, but he won't make time. Something says Tamra's probably not having another kid with Eddie.
Meanwhile, in Mexico, Shannon and David are unhappy with the size of their bedroom in Vicki's condo. Vicki embarrasses them by telling them she wants to hear the squeaky bedsprings at 2 a.m. and they aren't allowed to leave to stay somewhere else.
Shannon doesn't see what everyone else sees when it comes to Vicki and Brooks. She sees a couple who get along and enjoy one another, despite all of the stories she's heard about Brooks.
After a day of riding jet skis in the ocean, the four sit down to a tequila tasting where David ignores questions about his relationship with Shannon, which hurts Shannon's feelings. He also says they don't have many similar interests. He likes to work out and she...doesn't.
Vicki senses trouble in paradise and scoops Shannon away for the afternoon.
When Vicki orders coffee, Shannon orders a "weak" vodka. She proceeds to tell her side of the night she stopped by the Dubrow house being sure to paint Heather in as horrible a light as possible.
Vicki, because she's Vicki, buys it hook, line, and sinker. The two discuss how neither of them trusts Tamra anymore and decide Heather's the devil.
At dinner that night, Shannon tries to say that David's love of tequila is new, but what she actually says is "David isn't much of a drinker." He takes it the wrong way (or the right way) and she excuses herself to the restroom.
Vicki follows her and comments that, yeah, it sort of seemed like they were arguing at the table when Shannon asks her how they came across. It's clear to Vicki that David's checked out and Shannon tears him down instead of building him up.
All in all, that's an astute observation there, Vicki.
When they return to the table, the drama continues as the first thing out of Shannon's mouth is "next time don't make me look like such a bitch." Oh, okay, then. But you're doing a great job of that all by yourself there, sweetie.
She and David leave the table and she says that everyone's eyes on their relationship is making her "crazy in her head." She was crazy LONG before this trip to Mexico. Long before.
They all leave for Andale's with plans to "whoop it up." There will be dancing on bars in our future.
You can watch The Real Housewives of Orange County online to see it for yourself.