Breathe easy, everybody. Our long national nightmare is over and it turns out the rumors that Kate Upton hates her giant boobs are BS. We should probably make today a holiday.
Discussing her alleged hatred of the chest that made her famous during an interview in Australia, Kate remarked, "I actually didn't ever say that...I would say that I think all women feel sometimes they don't have life perfect. But I love my body. I always feel incredibly grateful for what I have."
We feel grateful for what you have too, Kate! Don't ever change! Seriously, please don't ever think about changing those things. That would be a tragedy on par with the Kennedy assassination.
Okay, we're exaggerating, but it's seriously a relief to hear that Kate has no plans of downsizing her massive rack.
Kate's been touring the globe promoting her new film The Other Woman, and false reports claimed the model-turned-actress was inspired by smaller-breasted co-star Cameron Diaz.
London's Sun tabloid misquoted Kate as saying, "I wish I had smaller boobs every day of my life...at least twice a day I wish it."
Talk about a cruel joke. Note to journalists: say whatever you want about the President, global warming, or the relationship between vaccinations and autism, but do not joke about Kate Upton's boobs. We hope someone got fired for this.