Monday night's The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 4 Episode 12 was all about protection, as the ladies proved they can be armed and dangerous.
We're not just talking about Brandi Glanville's mouth, either.
A self defense instructor taught the women how to put people in a choke hold, which we can only imagine will come in handy down the road for some of them.
Seriously. Can you imagine the number of people who will watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online once Brandi and Joyce start choking each other?
Yolanda, though, was definitely the most into the event ...
She almost took out the instructor ... then shared a story of confronting and turning away an armed intruder while she was naked and breastfeeding her baby.
Not to be outdone, Joyce shared a story of men with masks and shotguns coming up their driveway before being chased away by their trained attack dog.
Where do these people live exactly?!
Joyce says she now has machetes and baseball bats "behind every chair" of her house, which again should come in handy if Brandi Glanville shows up.
It gets crazier, too, on the Giraud front.
Her husband takes her for firearms training, at which point Joyce treated the weapon like a toy and giggled like a little kid holding it. It was a little disconcerting.
Somewhere, Brandi should be worried.
Speaking of which, Glanville's experience at the self-defense class ended with fractured hand and Lisa badgering her a lot as if she were her own mother.
She's a grown ass woman Lisa. Chill.
Elsewhere on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 4 Episode 12, Brandi brought Yolanda along in an attempt mend fences with her estranged dad.
After baring her soul with brutal honestly, it worked.
On a side note, Brandi's dad was once a free spirit hippie who was naked all the time, apparently, which may tell us a lot about Ms. Glanville in retrospect.
Finally, Carlton's throwing a party and auditioning the entertainment ... as in lots and lots of girls and we're talking about ones that now how to work a pole.
Sounds like a good, family-friendly time.