A four-inch-fork was recently removed from a man's penis after he apparently inserted it in there as part of a bizarre effort to achieve sexual gratification.
Seriously. This was in the International Journal of Surgery Cases.
The Canberra, Australia man was hospitalized with "bleeding urethral meatus" after the 70-year-old tried to lodge it in there for reasons unknown.
The fork was removed with forceps and "copious lubrication."
According to the report, this case was a first - but only because of the particular object. Other utensils and foreign objects have been in penises before.
Pens, safety pins, telephone cables, glue, cocaine, straws, marbles, light bulbs, carrots and snakes, among other strange things, have all been done.
According to a study on the subject, the "urological consequences of this behavior can be significant and the implications for patients can be serious."
Who would have guessed?
"It is apparent that the human mind is inhibited let alone creative," the authors concluded, in about the nicest possible way one could sum up this story.