Rihanna’s odd 777 tour - seven cities in seven days with a plane full of fans and reporters - ends in NYC this evening. For some, not a moment too soon.
As horror stories from the tour emerge at breakneck speed, so fast that the Unapologetic singer actually apologized (sorta) for some of what transpired.
Or more accurately, what didn't. Rihanna being MIA was the biggest gripe.
”I know you guys got barely any dirt,” she told the press Tuesday.
“I had to preserve my health. Normally, I’d be back here popping bottles with y’all ... I had to preserve my voice. I was worried about my body more than partying."
"I had to just sleep whenever I could.”
“But I had to be good. I still sound like $h!t. It’s impossible to spend time with everybody. I’m sorry I didn’t. But this was excellent and I would definitely do it again.”
No stories about Rihanna, ironically, became the big story. ”There has been general discontent with the dearth of interaction with the star,” Spin reported.
”One person was basically responsible for not only keeping us from doing our jobs, but from sleeping, eating, going outside or even using a bathroom."
Eventually, disgruntled plane passengers broke out in chants like ”Save our jobs! Save our jobs!” and “Just one quote!” and, most hilariously, “Wi-Fi!”
Other issues: Long waits on buses, tarmacs and in windowless pens, nude on-board streakers (above), bad food, too much alcohol and overall "bedlam."
Also distressing were the living conditions, which seemed closer to cattle keeping than the supposed glamor a round-the-world jet would imply.
The streaker, Australian DJ Tim Dormer, at least used the 777 tour to his advantage. Rihanna herself did not, despite the great cost of the publicity stunt.
The pop superstar gave fans and reporters attention on day one, mingling and serving champagne, and then promptly disappeared for the remaining six.
She did, however, tweet pics of herself in various stages of undress. Phew. Who cares about in-person mingling when you can see Rihanna nude on Twitter.