The Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: A Bald Canary Sings

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The Real Housewives of New Jersey are blindsided when "A Bald Canary Sings," or are they? We'll recap who got set up and who set the trap in our THG +/- review.

Let's go back to the beginning.  Melissa's getting ready for yet another meeting with some producer about her singing career. I couldn't care less about her musical future but I'd definitely pair the leopard print shoes with that dress.  Plus 7.

Oh, and if there is a God I will never be subjected to seeing Joe Gorga in a g-string.  I refuse to let my imagination go there.  Minus 12. The mere thought is frightening enough.

Joe Gorga Shows Off

The Manzos visit their boys in Hoboken for brunch and could Caroline make Lindsey feel any more uncomfortable?

First she comes in the door saying that it smells all the way down the hall and before you can wonder if that's a good or bad thing she ask to open a window.  Minus 10.  Well, there's a slap in the face to the cook.

Then Caroline gushes about how far Albie has come.  Now he has his own apartment and a good career but doesn't mention his beautiful, girlfriend whom he's living with and is sitting across the table.  Minus 11.  It was clearly Caroline's way of saying Lindsey is irrelevant in Albie's life without having to actually say it.

At least Chris has a good attitude.  As long as his brother's happy, he's happy.  Plus 15.

Caroline gushes about her kids making it on their own but who is she kidding when they pay the bills with Mommy and Daddy's checkbook. 

Especially Lauren who admits she walked away from her venture with Chateau the day after the grand opening.  Minus 10.  The girl never even tried to make a go of it.

Lauren's all jazzed because she signed the lease on a new place.  More like Mommy did.  And does anyone else thing CaFace is a horrible name?  Minus 8.

Then we're off with Kathy and Rich to see if she can pitch her desserts to a new company.  Why does she insist on bringing her husband along?  Rich can never keep his mouth shut and his sexual innuendos only make Kathy look more unprofessional.  Minus 12.

Oh, and Ashlee shows her face, if only through the computer.  The girl actually looks pretty good.  Somehow she's got a job in PR and has her own apartment.  She even got a new tattoo and didn't her mother look thrilled.

Seriously though, perhaps Ashlee might find her way now that she's not living with her ever coddling parents. Plus 9. Well, that or she might blow herself up.  We'll see.

Now on to the real fun.

Could Kim D. walk off a cliff?  Please? The woman is evil personified and ugly as sin.  The only question is, is she working alone or with an accomplice.

When she called Melissa to make amends I kept thinking it was like the spider calling to invite the fly over for dinner. 

Angelo couldn't have been more sleazy.  Minus 7.  If I had to pick someone out to play the role of a strip club manager it would be him. 

And are we really suppose to believe that he just happened to wait on Kim and Teresa and just happen to mention he knew Melissa as a stripper?  Kim D's cheshire cat smile told the story.  This was a complete set up but was Teresa an innocent bystander or a pawn in the game?

Did Teresa really buy Kim's little, Oops, so sorry?  Could she really be that stupid?  Wait, what am I saying?  This is Teresa I'm talking about, so yeah, it's definitely possible.  Minus 10.

Just when I thought they couldn't have staged a scene better than the spa, we get to the Fashion show where Angelo just happens to show up and makes a point of speaking to Melissa.

Minus 20.  The only thing real about this reality TV show is the script it's written on. 

No matter who Kim D. was working with, she set this up to make sure there was plenty of drama once again at her show in the hopes that the cameras would come back again next year. 

If any of the Housewives had a brain in their head they'd skip this second rate fashion and stay home next year but what are the odds?

Next week it looks like it all hits the fan.  Will you be watching and who is to blame? Kim D, Teresa, or both?

EPISODE TOTAL: -69! SEASON TOTAL: -405!

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Poison. Total poison. No one in their right mind would treat people the way the Manzo's do. Horrible role models. Horrible Italians. Horrible New Jerseyians, horrible Americans.

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Now that the Manzo's have been fired, we will watch that show again.

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Caroline is diabolical. She is forever planning harm, even to her own family. She pays no attention to how her sons turned out. She shows no compassion for her daughter. That is why Lauren got fat. She eats her sorrows fed to her by her family.

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The Manzo's and Teresa give Italians a bad name. Caroline gives all of Jersey a bad name. We should not put up with this in defense of Italians and Jersey.

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Malicious Caroline is a terrible influence on her children. That is why Lauren locked herself in the trailor to cry, and the boys hire strippers for a carwash! How sickening weird! No wonder no one respects that sinister family. It is so NOT Italian!

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Melissa needs to see that Caroliune is the real enemy. Teresa deserves this because of how she treated others. What goes around comes around. Isn't karma a bitch Caroline & Teresa?

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Shame on Bravo for allowing Caroline to speak. Only faul skunk comes out of her mouth.

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Caroline bashes everyone. Who the H is she? Thank God she was finally fired. It is so about time. So pathetic how she can't see that her faults outweigh all her castmates.

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Caroline is so cruel. I was completely outraged to see her both on reunion shows and on the series in general. What is wrong with her? Why in the world did Bravo hire someone with such mental problems?

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Caroline & Teresa are evil to the bone. They enjoyed hurting Danielle. Now Caroline is enjoying hurting Teresa. Is this the Italian culture? Sa sad.

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