The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Reunion Recap, Part I: Sparks, Snark and Memories

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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are sitting on the couch. No it's not therapy. It's the reunion show and who would miss it. We recap all of the confessions, name calling, and overall snarkiness in our THG +/- review!

The first half of this reunion starts off with no Dana, Brandi or Kim. Although the first two aren't mentioned, Andy tells us that Kim has checked herself in to an alcohol and drug treatment center. Well thank goodness for that.

Plus 20. That woman needs help and it's about time she got it.

Kim in Rehab

The rest of the ladies are present and have Taylor Armstrong's lips gotten even bigger than they were all season or is it just me? Minus 10. I think she can stop the injections now. Her transformation into a duck is nearly complete.

But we'll get back to Taylor later.

Instead we move on to admiring Lisa's curvaceous back end. Yes, we get a montage of booty shots of the classy Brit. Plus 5 because she barely blushes as she scoffs at Andy's question about implants.

Of course things take a darker turn rather quickly. I never realized that everyone took Lisa's dry humor so seriously. Yes, she can be kind of snarky but her little digs are generally funny and right on the mark.

Poor Adrienne is still ticked about Lisa's calling her new shoe line the Maloof hoof. Personally I think the moniker is hilarious but I suppose if they were my shoes I might not be so happy. But how many things rhyme with Maloof?

But Minus 10 to Adrienne whining about Lisa's tweet about her crackpot dog. They both have crackpot dogs for goodness sake. 
Maloof Hoof

Kyle also jumps on the beat up Lisa bandwagon and laments how hurt she was when Lisa accused Kyle of being desperate for attention. Honey, you were doing splits on a tabletop at a party. If you were looking for any more attention you would have had to take your top off. Minus 7.

Then Kyle cries about being misinterpreted on game night. People don't realize that she's really not like that. If I remember correctly she gave one hell of a performance as a bullying mean girl on game night. I don't see how she can blame Lisa for that. Minus 8.

Finally the conversation gets back around to $25K sunglasses, edible gold dust, in home full service spas, and dresses worth tens of thousands of dollars.

In other words, things most of us will never come close to having and part of the reason why we tune into this show. Plus 10.

After that bit of fun we get back around to Taylor. She says she was so used to being controlled by Russell that now that he's gone she finds that making her own decisions is hard.

And Lisa recalls a text she saw from Russell to his wife that sounds downright scary. Minus 12. Taylor has real issues if she let her daughter be witness to that type of behavior.

Taylor Armstrong Cries a Lot

Everyone offers they sympathy and support but Camille is still pissed about Taylor making her out to be the villain in this drama. I don't think these two will ever be the friends they once were.

Andy asks whether the show should have aired after Russell's suicide. Adrienne says yes because it delivers a message about domestic abuse and suicide. Camille disagrees.

She worries about Russell's children viewing the show. Unfortunately, I'm sure Kennedy will have plenty of issues to deal with with or without the show.

Then we go back to beating up on Lisa. Adrienne accuses her of getting paid for leaking stories to on-line sources. Minus 10. Lisa denies it vehemently and Adrienne seems willing to take the word of some sleazy on-line reporter instead of her supposed friend. If Adrienne can't back up this story with more facts I think she needs to keep her mouth shut.

Bet Lisa's happy she has new neighbors.

Just before the first half ends Brandi Glanville makes an appearance. No matter what anyone thinks of Brandi, you have to admit that the girl's funny. Plus 13

Brandi admits that she and ex Eddie Cibrian only speak through his assistant but that they never badmouth one another to their kids. Of course their friends get an earful which they consider fair game.

Thankfully it looks like Brandi sticks around for next week's episode. When the gloves come off we'll see who's still left sitting on the sofa.


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