Dirty Soap Recap: Farah Fath and Kirsten Storms Argue a Lot

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Last week's Dirty Soap was heavy on overbearing mama drama.

This week, relationships between cast members were the focus.

Where do we even begin recapping the goings on with E!'s new crop of reality stars ... who are sort of actual stars, if you watch the soap operas they star in at least.

Let's kick off this week's recap with Brandon Beemer (how do you become anything but a soap star when given a name like that) giving Nadia Bjorlin a birthday gift.

Dirty Soap Cast

 She got an iPad. She was unmoved, yearning for something personal. Kind of ungrateful, given that those things cost like $500 without 3G. But whatever, moving on.

At lunch Farah Fath wonders why Nadia and Brandon aren’t engaged, to which she responds that she is in no rush because it's not like marriage is any kind of guarantee.

Cynical, but not altogether untrue.

Then, wouldn't you know it, without ANY prompting from producers whatsoever, the conversation pivots to Days of Our Lives co-stars and the infamous Kirsten Storms.

Farah and Kirsten have not spoken since she made out with John-Paul Lavoisier a while back on some sort of crossover thing. We forget. But apparently it was bad!!

Later, Danny tells Farah he saw Kirsten the other day and that she thinks Farah is jealous. Gasp. Good guy that he is, Danny/the producers offer their help if needed.

At Nadia’s birthday party, Farah and JP see Kirsten and Kelly, who really needs to find friends more in her age bracket if she decided to come as Kirsten’s wingman.

Farah vents at Kirsten. The waterworks start to flow. Then flow some more.

Kelly, like the rest of us, has no actual clue what's even going on here.

In the end, all we know is Farah walks away and cries; Kirsten doesn't.

John-Paul Lavoisier and Farah Fath

The married Jenna and Galen join Brandon and Nadja for a getaway trip to Napa. They're leaving their kids at home for the first time ... and clearly it's not easy.

Despite a couple of phone calls, and probably more we didn't see, Jenna does calm down and relax a bit, and by and large, Nadja is satisfied with her birthday.

Honestly, what 31-year-old cares that much about her birthday. You made it another year without dying and have a paying job. Be happy and just chill, girl.

Back in L.A., Kelly Monaco is not a big fan of weddings, despite the fact that she's about to tie the knot on General Hospital. How is THAT for irony, people?!?!

Wouldn't you know it, things begin to change as she tries on that wedding dress. She can't help but think about her future and what she's doing in this world.

Will she live for the moment, or look to the future? These are things that a soap opera star must deal with as she acts out a fake wedding. It's, like, so deep.

Farah and Kirsten decide to meet again and argue about Lord knows what. We've lost track at this point, but Farah doesn’t like that Kirsten pushes her away!

Kirsten, for her part, is ticked about how Farah talks about how her and her life behind her back and has NO idea what she's even talking about, girlfriend.

So there.

Farah goes home and whines to JP and Dan about how she just wants to get along but Kirsten can't function without the drama and is one messed-up bitch.

Kirsten and Kelly, meanwhile, blow off steam in Vegas. Girl time cures all. What did you think of this week's Dirty Soap episode? Comment on it below!

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I miss the show I loved both Nadia and Kirsten. I love Farah I think sometimes Shes to openminded and She dosent think about what Kirsten went through but there both friends now and thats all that matters.

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I totally feel for kirsten,i hope she heals quickly,Her reaction was expected from anyone in her situation.

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Dear Kristen,
I had the same condition in my 30's. Yes it is painful. And yes they can correct the problem. Time to start living again. Get well soon.

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Oh for crying out loud...Boo freaking hoo!!! I love Kirsten Storms too but everybody just lay off Farah, one of my all time soap faves!!! You people knocking her must be just jealous because Farah Fath is gorgeous, intriguing, and actually too good for some reality soap that I am just now hearing or reading about! She actually belongs in movies in my opinion! As a matter of fact, she would be perfect for a character in a script I am currently working on!

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hope kirsten is getting better miss her on gh

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If FArah is the actress taking Kirsten's place on GH, I mute her when she comes on! Her voice is so annoying. I really miss Kirsten and wish that she is able to hurry back soon!
Her condition ishorrendous; but adopting is beyond joy!

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I have endomitriosis and from experience I agree with Kirstin's reaction! To all of you who think it's not a big deal think again! I am 30 years old and have had 9 surgeries because of it and my last one took my ovaries and tubes out. The pain is excruciating! I will have to have another surgery to take my uterus. I feel for Kirstin and the physical and emotional pain she is going through. So to everyone that is talking crap about her.. Unless you have the disease and have gone though all the pain and have been told you can't have kids then you can have an opinion if you dont then SHUT THE F UP! You don't know what you are talking about!
Kirstin I wish you the best of luck and a speedy recovery! I miss you on gh!

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You never know how a diagnosis is going to hit you, i was told i had multicysts on ovaries and endometriosis, and this was after several pre-cancer scares and treatments. this was over 3 yrs and i truy felt like God was punishing me. i did not want to live without a child made by me and my husband, luckily i have been thru extensive therapy. I still cry when someone kills a baby or one goes missisng, i don't understand why God lets that happen when we have been perfect parents. the best feeling in the world to me is hoding a newborn, God has blessed parents with his precious gift,

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I just would like to say this about the comments about the over dramatic comments. Not everyone's body is the same, I have fibriods on my uterus and endometriosis. When you have someone telling you that you can't have children or if you are familar with what the illiness is you have no other way but to react like your whole world is over. So until any of you walk one day in someone's shoes that has been diaganosed, or has lost someone to cancer or experienced this yourselves keep your mouth shut! I can't have children at all 5 miscarriages and I am 33! I have a friend that has had 6 miscarriages due to having endometriosis.

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Farah is so not entertaining! Bore! Go HOME!