Keeping Up with the Kardashians Review: Bladder Up!

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What are we doing, readers? Did we just spend a half hour of our lives watching Kris Jenner talk about her bladder and her vagina? Have we no dignity?!?

While I re-consider how I spend my free time, let's review the latest scripted episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, THG style!

Kris Jenner often pees herself. MINUS 7 because I don't care and because that's gross.

There's apparently a rule of no phones at the dinner table in this household. Multiple TV cameras, though? No problem! PLUS 9.

Kris is upset because her kids keep giving her a hard time over her bladder in front of strangers. Unless me and her are tighter than I realized, MINUS 19 for her complaining about this to a TV camera.

Bruce hopes to "inspire" others at a local heli-park. MINUS 12. Bruce Jennifer is an Olympian decathlete, folks.

These girls have to understand the value of money and hard work, Bruce says about his daughters. It's true. PLUS 3 because you can't just lie down, turn on a camera and invite Ray J into your room to get somewhere in life.

Kim uses the word "romantical." MINUS 47.

MINUS 112 because Kourtney just brought up her mom's "leaky vagina."

We just watched Kris Jenner get a gynecological exam. MINUS 879.

Kourtney and Kris are now doing simultaneous kegel exercises. MINUS 1,179. This is the worst half hour of my life.

PLUS 11 for Kylie and Kendall going to a downtown mission and meeting the first black people they've ever seen who aren't dating one of their siblings.

Kris turns her bladder leaking into an endorsement deal. Our pain is her monetary pleasure, people. MINUS 83.

EPISODE TOTAL: -2,247. SEASON TOTAL: -2,581

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Fuck you and your mother too. Fuck Kardashians!

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@bo bo witch damn,4 u 2 b struggln wit a disease,u'd think u wud have a lil more class/a much better attitude. U cant get mad & hate on them bcuz they got $$$$. Get up& do sumthn about ur situation b4 u let their great situation gve u a heart attack. It sounds like u blamin them 4 ppl lovin b.s. Reality shows,do u kno how many ppl u need 2 hate... Some actors&ALL reality stars,bcuz they have no talent either. U shud get over that f*ckd up as attitude&stop being so jealous. & f u ever met them,wut makes u think that they wud like yo a**?!?

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Boycott all the Kardahian Merchanside. Kris Jenner raised a pack of whores who likes chocolate men. Really now. While I am struggling with a disease and trying to save my home these people are making a killing off of rating and poor people. I have no respect for Bruce Jenner who apparently is capitalizing off their stinky dumb asses! Fuck you Kris Jenner you ugly fat old broad who has a flair for money hungre whores.

Kim Kardashian Biography

Kim Kardashian, Boobs Kim Kardashian is the ex-girlfriend of Nick Cannon, Reggie Bush and Ray J. She had intercourse on camera with the former, which is what... More »
Born
Birthplace
Los Angeles, California
Full Name
Kimberly Noel Kardashian

Kim Kardashian Quotes

So far, designing is the most exciting thing I’ve done... I have a vision of what I want [the clothes] to look like in my mind and it’s fun to see it come alive on paper.

Kim Kardashian

He just seemed very firm about the change, and that’s, like, his motto.

Kim Kardashian [on Barack Obama]