Jersey Shore Recap: LET'S DO IT!!!!!

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Antics such as Deena's bi-curious robbery are almost par for the course on Jersey Shore. The kind of pent-up rage we saw last night, however? Off the chain!

It was one of the most-hyped events of the entire fourth season, and the culmination of the rage between Ronnie and Mike actually lived up to expectations.

Somewhat disturbingly, but it lived up to it.

As always, we've recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you. Let's break last night's episode, "Crime and Punishment," THG +/- style!

Drinking on the Job

Comcast episode description: "Ronnie and Sammi return to their old ways." Shiver. Minus 6. Special episode airing Sunday night before the VMAs? Plus 10!

Snooki shut off communication with Mike, saying their "bridge is burned," then took Ron's advice and told Jionni. We think they're good ... for now. Plus 4.

Vinny told the guys that Deena c*ck-blocked him, but that's not entirely true, as Erica didn't really smush Deena and ended up in Vin's bed later, so Minus 5.

There's a difference between a "tag-team" and a "tag-rob." Who knew. Plus 3.

Pauly and Vinny took Deena's bed into the living room as a prank. She then had an anxiety attack. Sad, but she brought this girl-on-girl drama on herself, so Wash.

Calling it like he sees it, Pauly confronts Deena for not acting like herself. He makes a point. The lesbian-ic experience sorta came outta nowhere. Plus 3.

Pauly shows how he gets all the girls ... to the pizza place. Plus 2.

Wisdom of Pauly D

Snooki and Deena decide to drink on the job. Plus 7, because we're frankly surprised it took as long as it did, and at least they (sort of) tried to conceal it.

Deena sums up Jersey Shore (and all reality shows): "That isn't me. I feel very, like, alone here, and I'm, like, just drinking, and then I do stupid (crap) like I did last night ... and instead of fixing it, I just keep drinking." Amen, babe. Plus 11.

Sitch and Pauly are rejected by two girls as a "package deal." Plus 5.

Ronnie and Sam actually had a nice date night. Won't last, but Plus 4.

During a night out at club YAB, a drunk Ron and a drunk Sam - wait ... wait ... hope you're sitting down - got into an argument. GROAN. And Minus 14.

Situation, as always, is in the middle of the fiery couple's he-said, she-said war of words. You can see where this is going, and it's gonna be epic. Plus 5.

Obligatory Minus 9, though, for Ron's anger issues, and Sitch's clear antagonizing of a guy with anger issues. The guys are both to blame in all of this.

"It's none of my business, but you both love each other at the end of the day, so just know that." - Sitch, after noting he's gonna smush Brittany. Plus 3.

Ronnie Gets Pissed

Sam told Ron about Sitch's comment a few weeks ago, in which Sitch relayed Ron's boast that he could be bringing five girls back if he wanted. Uh oh. Plus 5.

Ron rips off his shirt off in a fit of ('roid) rage, telling Sam he's gonna "f*%k him up" if she doesn't say what she just told him. We're a little scared. Minus 6.

Ronnie goes into the bedroom, flips The Situation's mattress off the bed, flings a blanket out of the room, then a suitcase. We are now more scared. Minus 8.

Mike starts spewing nonsense (and spit), such as denying he gets involved in Ron's relationship (LOL) and practically begs Ron to throw down. Uh oh. Plus 19.

"LET'S DO ITTTT!!!!" The Situation screams. "STAAAAAAAAP!!!" Sammi screams. Every word of Ron's is edited out. They circle each other. Plus 15 for what felt like a gripping reenactment of a scene from Rise of the Planet of the Apes.

Minus 7 for Sam getting shoved out of the way by Ron. Uncool.

The pent-up anger boiled over. The roommates crowded around. The credits rolled. Minus 10 for leaving us hanging like that. First Bachelor Pad and now this!

Minus 5, because we know this ends badly for Situation.

EPISODE TOTAL: +24. SEASON TOTAL: +104.

Whose side are you on?

 

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Has anyone noticed that when they started to go at it Mikes shorts were one way and the camera turned for a sec. And. They were a different way???

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I cnt wait to see ron kick mikes ass, he needs a good ass kickin! All mike is is a trouble maker, mayb ron can beat some sense in him!!!!

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I am so glad someone is going to beat Mike up I have hated him since the first show. he should know better then to start sh@t with ron what the hell is he thinking rons arms are bigger then his whole body. maybe mike will stop starting Sh@t with people in the house first Snooki and now Ron and sam and he says he never lies. the crap he started is all lies just proves what a dbag he is

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So so sad! This is embarrasing for the united states, its amazing that this waste of human space gets paid to be trash. I will enroll in law school to get trash off this beautiful world....

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Anyone notice since Ron got back with Sam, he told the girls that Mike told him about Snooki, and last night he told them about Deena and her girlfriend? He's quite the gossip girl these days. For that reason alone, I am on team Mike.

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ahahaha!!!! funny shit like always, I ABSOLUTELY LOVE RONNIE COZ HE CAN GET ANYTHING HE WANT's hehehe anyway's Kelly you are right, i agree girl (= BTW im 20 any cute boy's would wanna add me? ;) :P

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i pick team ron becase why would he tell sammi that ron bring 5 girls to the house like sitt down some were

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A true sign of the apocalypse. A bigger waste of oxygen and food for a pride of lions was never seen on this planet. Pathetic. I sincerely hope that we aren't judged by history by these buffoons.

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At every job I've ever had there was always the little blurb in the employee handbook or employee code of conduct about being under the influence of alcohol in any dectable amount while at work being grounds for being fired on the spot. I always laughed at that and thought it was a no brainer, who would do that? Now I know. Ugh.