It's Thanksgiving time in New Jersey. Can the Real Housewives get through the holiday without brawling? Do you really want them to?
Find out with our recap and a + or - points review.
The Guidices and Gorgas are celebrating Thanksgiving separately this year and that alone earns them a Minus 10. The boredom factor at both parties makes me wish they had come together like only this family can because apart, all they can do is whine and complain about the missing family.
But let's cover the pre-party planning. Teresa and Joe head to a turkey farm to pick out their bird. Teresa drives and Joe sits in the passenger seat where he can spout lines like "you're a friggin ditz" as she gets lost. Can you feel the love? Apparently Teresa can because she just giggles proving yet again that there is somebody for everyone. Plus 5.
It takes Teresa a while to realize that the poultry she can buy at the storefront is actually killed in the back. This is a poultry farm.
Yet, Joe and Teresa earn a Plus 5 when they can't bring themselves to send a bird to slaughter. As the farmer insists the birds don't feel a thing, Joe thinks it looks scare and Teresa quips, "Do they speak turkey? How do they know?" I know some bird ended up dead either way but the couples' concern for the scared bird was kind of cute.
Can Caroline please stop pushing for Vito to marry her daughter. Minus 8 for putting so much pressure on this relationship. With all that marriage talk I wouldn't blame Vito if he made a run for it.
Cookiegate is most exciting thing about the Guidice's Thanksgiving. Teresa's just wrong when she complains about the cookies her sister-in-law once brought to a party. Not only did she complain to Melissa at the time it happened but she rehashes it for her new party guests. Minus 10 for being so darn rude.
For someone who hosts a lot of parties Teresa certainly needs to brush up on her manners. Even if you don't like the cookies, even it you really do throw them out later, you smile and say thank you. It's not hard. It's common courtesy and she might want to give it a shot.
Did anyone else laugh when Jacqueline quipped that "Teresa never complains about money?" Well from the looks of things what's there to complain about? They still live in the same huge house, still drive luxury cars, and still throw extravagant parties. I'm at a loss to how bankruptcy has changed their lives.
When we head over to the Gorga's Thanksgiving we find Melissa and her evil sisters in matching leopard outfits but it's the mink apron that earns them a Plus 3. Can it get more over the top than that? Oh, just wait.
Joe has a surprise. What can make any Thanksgiving complete? How about a mechanical bull? I know, now everyone's going to put it on their list for next Thanksgiving. I'll throw him Plus 5 for originality. Personally I think the whole thing would have been more fun to watch with a little more alcohol and a little less padding.
But I'm taking 10 points back for the absolute hypocrisy of the cursing that would make sailors blush and then turning around and saying grace. Am I the only one that sees a problem in this?
EPISODE TOTAL: -15! SEASON TOTAL: -18!
Tune in next week to find out if yet another housewife is trying to turn her stint on reality TV into a singing career. Can you guess which one?