America's Got Talent Results: The Many Faces of New York City

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The second set of auditions in New York City ramped up the weird on America's Got Talent, starting with zombies chasing girls. There were some true oddities that actually had some potential to be a real Vegas act, however.

Let's run it down...

Sharon Osbourne as a Judge

The Smag Bros. - Bill and Pat started off with some talented wheelie work and it was really synchronized. The fact that they could do such a great job on a small and slippery floor was amazing. Anything attempting to crush a friend was worth watching.

Shemika Charles - In the preview she said that she was the world record holder, but we never got her story on the show. It's really pretty disappointing when you're the focus on the commercials, but given a five-second preview.

Leonid the Magnificent - The act was really crazy, but the quick change segments were actually really fast. There was something captivating about the changing; the horrible singing was comedic. He is probably the best definition of variety act.

Narcissister - When I saw the mask, I knew the performance would be really strange. Then ,a head popped out of her va-jay-jay. I thought the execution was a bit off at points but the use of "Upside Down" was a great choice.

Sam B. - The freestyle dancer and unsuccessful ladies’ man managed to get some height with his jumping. His knee drop must have been painful but he was going so passionately that even I wanted to join him. Take a look at the floor as he danced; it occasionally buckle with his weight. His final move was just an untalented Volleyball tumble. Extra credit goes to Piers who understood the amazingly awful reason for why we would watch him.

Sally Gould Dancers - Stereotypical girls with interesting costumes. They dared to do the Vogue-inspired Duck Walk, which was the only thing that I thought had inspiration and originality.

Ed Cole - I'm not sure exactly what the act would actually be, but the old man was buff and kind of funny about the whole thing.

Rachel Zamstein - Rachel had a quadruple sob story: Divorce! Bullying! Drugs! Alcohol! Then, her finding music was that coming to Jesus moment. I'm sure if Joss Stone was her best choice because of how wordy the song was. All that Rachel was showing was her lack of breath control. She deserves a shot, but she needed to push harder.

$andy Kane (Naked Cowgirl) - She loved Nick, who was "Sweeter than Ice Cream on a stick." $andy looked like what Katy Perry would look like in 20 years.

Rak and Tak - Rak and Tak was a bit of an Indian pastiche, but they had something funny about them. The thing that made it worse was the fact that they were off tempo. I loved how the judges never buzzed the couple and let them suffer together. When the two tried to sing together, I'm pretty sure the dogs in my neighborhood were howling in response.

Tomorrow: Asian Susan Boyle. Keep the DVR ready for that.

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