Lindsay Lohan: I'm Clean ... For Life!

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No booze, no drugs, no shoplifting, no court dates. Never, ever again.

That's what Lindsay Lohan claims is her plan for life, telling friends she's not just serious about cleaning up her act short-term, but for good. No exceptions.

Please, try to stifle your laughter at least a little bit ...

Cold Out Here

Sources close to Lindsay hilariously say the actress had an epiphany after her recent sentencing and is completely at peace with the judge's decision.

Lindsay is staying positive about community service, fines, counseling, shoplifters alternative class and serving jail time under house arrest - the works.

Lohan's required to stay sober during her probation - which ends after she completes 480 hours of community service - or she faces consequences.

However, people close to Lindsay say she's committed to sobriety for the long haul and that the train wreck has learned her lesson once and for all.

Anyone buying it? Tell us: Can Lindsay Lohan stay clean?



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Not worth a comment!!


If she can go 3 months without any illegal or substance-related antics, I MIGHT believe her.


What is she trying to do now be a comedian???? I thought what she said was funny. lmao


Good for you Lindsay....My prayers are with you Keep it up.


Lindsay...remember ACTIONS speak louder than words !!!


If she wants people to take her seriously, she should start with a bath, brush her grotesque hair, cover up her saggy boobs with a bra, stop lying, stop drinking, stop doing drugs.... Oh, never mind. Ha Ha Ha Ha


If Lindsay was really in a program and serious about her recovery she would not be making statements about being clean "for life". Even if she were totally clean now and all gung ho about staying that way she would understand, if she was really working her program, that it is a daily struggle and that she must take it one day at a time. I don't believe she is sincere. I think she is just glad that she once again avoided jail and will say or do anything to make herself look even a tiny bit better. She is still in denial and for no good reason has caught yet another break from the criminal justice system. Why she continues to get away with things that the rest of us would be behind bars for is beyond me but it is only making her worse, not better.


Gosh. You'd think that by now, she would have grown up to know that such statements shouldn't be made publicly.
Everyone has that friend, or has been that person, that says after every big night: I'm never drinking again! And then the weekend rolls around, and guess who's drunk...
You suck, Lindsay.