Simon van Kempen Declares: I Am Real!

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You know you were hoping for this when you got up today.

Simon van Kempen just joined an exclusive club - Countess LuAnn, Danielle Staub and Kim Zolciak are members - of Bravo cast members who put out music.

We'd say sing, but he doesn't really do that (nor do they). At least in Simon's case, The Real Housewives of New York City star seems to be going for humor.

At least we hope. "I Am Real" is a bass-thumping, synth-heavy dance track filled with defiant lyrics aimed at "cheeky tongue waggers." You gotta hear it:

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...ya real gay!!! There is no way this man is straight