Jesse James is engaged to Kat Von D. This came as a bit of a surprise, as he's been divorced for only about half a year. But we wish them the best. Seriously.
His former mistress Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, though? She's just interested in clinging to whatever's left of her 15 minutes. Mere seconds, hopefully.
Her latest, amusing claim? That sex with Jesse James was merely average.
Yes, Jesse James cheated on Sandra with that.
Chatting about their 11-month affair, taking place while he was married to Sandra Bullock, Bombshell didn't hold back on The Wendy Williams Show Tuesday.
McGee claims their sex sessions were "average," and that their first encounter - when she came to his office for an "interview" - was less than smooth.
"It was weird ... he asked me to sit on the couch next to him and watch a movie," said McGee, a mother of two. "It was very 12-year-old. He kind of did the whole reaching around and that’s where he started kissing me. It was very awkward."
Things didn't get better from there.McGee was, by all accounts, not impressed by James' skills in the sack, although she did smash that a bunch of times, so it couldn't have been that bad.
In any case, the shameless mistress, who says she is bisexual, wouldn't mind getting close with his ex-wife. In a friendly way, or sexually. Seriously.
"I love Sandra Bullock I’m a huge fan," said Michelle McGee, who was photographed licking a photo of the Oscar winner. "She's hot. She's really cute."
That she is. As for Kat Von D?
"Kat, run for your life!" she said. "He is a cheater. You cannot change a man. You cannot change a leopard's spot. Once a cheater always a cheater."
Then the ultimate zinger: "If he cheated on a beautiful woman like Sandra Bullock, like, what makes you think he's not going to cheat on you?"
Ouch ... so she's saying Kat Von D isn't a beautiful woman? She bears some resemblances to McGee, obviously ... yet is much more attractive.
Good riddance, Bombshell. Fourth time's the charm for Jesse!