Inside the (Fake) Kardashian Sister Split!

Khloe, Kourtney and Kim Kardashian have been spotted together numerous times over the last few weeks, most recently at the opening for Dash NYC.

But beneath the red carpet smiles and plastic body parties, Life & Style has breaking, utterly contrived news for fans of thees siblings: they hate each other!!!

"When Khloé arrived in NYC, Kim wanted nothing more than for the three sisters to hit the town together and have fun," an insider tells the tabloid. "But Khloé said Kim was being a selfish bitch. Kim burst into tears and rushed out of the room."

Forget a pretend Kardashian split... Amber Portwood has three boyfriends AND a baby?!?

Indeed, while Kim claims to be content with her single life, such a contrast with her siblings has apparently created an opportunity for imaginary sources to give fake quotes a riff.

"Kim definitely feels abandoned," says this family friend. "It's clear that Kourtney and Khloé are bonding over being settled down, and Kim just doesn't fit in."

It really is clear, isn't it, people?

The magazine claims Kourtney and Khloe are also freezing Kim out of their business, making decisions about clothing locations inside Dash without consulting their sister.

"They've grown apart much more than Kim had realized. It's made her very sad," reads this cover story.