Despite filing divorce papers and taking a (relative) hiatus from the public eye earlier this summer, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are not actually splitting up.
We told you so, and thank goodness.
After separating in May, rumors of a Heidi Montag sex tape preceded the plastic pair's "reunion" in Costa Rica this month. But they never really split, you see.
Looks like Speidi's divorce is off. Was it ever on? [Photos: Pacific Coast News]
The gruesome twosome were secretly living together all summer, Radar Online reports, and naturally left their rental house in Malibu in a state of disrepair.
"Heidi and Spencer made some very expensive upgrades to the house, without the owner’s permission,” a source close to the situation told the gossip site.
Speidi miraculously stayed out of sight very well for a bit, before returning with hilarious, staged photo shoots like the ones above, celebrating her birthday.
“Wanting to keep prying eyes away, they planted 20 foot tall trees along the front of the house against the wall. They also took it upon themselves to change the pool from chlorine to salt water which was very expensive," says a source.
The couple recently moved out and told people close to them that they were “were relocating to Costa Rica together" the source said. That's likely bull$h!t, but she was seen there holding her giant boobs in the ocean last week.
Whatever their plans, the owner of the rental place is pissed.
"Heidi and Spencer fired the gardener the owner had. They did so because they have four small dogs and complained that the gardener was leaving the gate open and letting them out. They brought in their own gardener,” the source added.
"Heidi and Spencer were required to put down a much bigger security deposit because they have four dogs," the insider continued. "The dogs peed on a $15,000 carpet and Heidi and Spencer threw it out without telling the owner."
One thing that's not in doubt? That the couple is back on.
“Yes, they are living back together again. He is delighted that she is giving their relationship another chance,” a source says of the great Spencer Pratt.
Heidi recently told the AP that their divorce is on hold: "As far as I'm concerned the last thing in the world after everything we have just been through is to go through with this divorce. But we are just taking life second by second."
Except for when they plan elaborate, long-running hoaxes.