Happy Birthday, Charlie Sheen... NOT!

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Charlie Sheen turns 45 years old today.

Sadly, that number does not also reflect the number of days this actor was forced to spend behind bars for his December 2009 confrontation with wife Brooke Mueller.

Despite numerous reports that said Sheen held a knife to Mueller's throat and threw her around like a rag doll, Sheen got off with a month in rehab... and a raise from CBS to remain a member of the Two and a Half Men cast!

Therefore, instead of asking readers to send in their birthday wishes, let's change it up: submit your best Sheen insult to THG today and don't hold back. Really let this loser have it!

Two and a Half Men Promo Picture
Tabloid Cover
Stogie Smoker
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hey charlie happy bday i hope it's a great one i dont hate you love you charlie and the show and alan have a great one have a great party

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Charlie Sheen HAPPY BIRTHDAY! TE AMO MAIS QUE TUDO!

Finstoneschewableheroin

How does a cest pool like Two and a Half Men survive?

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Happy Birthday Charlie! Have a wonderful day, but be good!! Love you and love the show! Everybody doesn't hate you. Muah!!!

Charlie Sheen Quotes

Sean Penn, Mel Gibson, Colin Farrell. They didn't give me any advice. Within that there's great advice. There's just love. Just seeing what's up.

Charlie Sheen

All these words just sound cool together. They come from my grand wizard master.

Charlie Sheen