Spencer Pratt to Write Heidi Montag Tell-All Book

Spencer Pratt says he is ready to tell all.

As if he hasn't done so for years already.

The Hills villain and increasingly erratic character reveals that he is penning a tell-all about his relationship with ex Heidi Montag, including new details about her often tormented relationship with her mother, Darlene Egelhoff.

"My last book, How to be Famous, didn't make the New York Times best-seller list because it was in the self-help section," Spencer Pratt tells Us Weekly.

"This one is going to be totally different. I'm not holding anything back."

Thank goodness.

Spencer Pratt is taking time away from his busy schedule as an aspiring soft porn director to pen a book on life with Heidi. [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

In July, Montag filed for divorce after one year of marriage, citing irreconcilable differences. Their divorce is expected to be finalized on Valentine's Day 2011.

For a couple that has made every detail of its existence public in order to gain money and fame (with considerable success), what's left to write a book about?

Moreover, what should he call it? Some ideas we had ...

• My Life: As Scripted as The Hills
• Someone Paid Me to Write This: A Memoir
  
• Lauren Conrad Totally Has a Sex Tape
  
• I Have Zero Friends and Am Very Bored
• Wild Times With Pacific Coast News on Speed Dial
  
• The Hills Are Alive and Really, Really Fake ... I'm Totally Talking About Both the MTV Reality Show and Heidi's Rack at the Same Time

UPDATE: Heidi Montag has responded and is downright furious with Spencer Pratt's new tell-all book idea, and threatening to stop him at all costs.

Of her soon-to-be-ex-husband's machinations, Heidi tells TMZ that "This is exactly why I left him ... Right now I'm looking into my legal options."