The Bachelorette Recap: Roberto Martinez Leads the Pack, Kirk DeWindt Gets Stuffed

by at . Comments

After last week, The Bachelorette had its work cut out for it.

Not only were the stakes high for Ali with hometown dates looming, but the Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi clash made for riveting, must-see train wreck TV.

The hometown dates themselves last night? They all went well. Like, really well. She picked some good guys (mostly). Awesome for Ali, a little boring for us.

Still, there was plenty to like about the episode, and plenty of hometown drama for us to go over here in THG's patented plus-minus rundown of events ...

Roberto Martinez. Baseball uniform. Shameless, ABC. Plus 7.

Minus 3 for the wasted potential of baseball/dating puns (second base? eh?), but Plus 5 for Ali toeing the line between girly and sporty perfectly. So cute.

Beautiful Ali F.

Who will win the heart of The Bachelorette, Ali Fedotowsky?

The Bachelorette star? So what. Roberto Sr. wants to make sure Ali is good enough for his son. Plus 4 for him taking it to her, and for her handling it well.

If Roberto is the favorite, Chris Lambton is a close second. Ali Fedotowsky does seem to be a perfect fit in Chris' Cape Cod home. Bay State 4 life!! Plus 6.

Minus 5 for the slight overkill regarding Chris' mom. Yes, it's a big part of who he is, and he's very sincere. It's the producers who overdo this narrative.

How much do you want to swap your own family for Chris'? Plus 8.

The Lambtons are so, so genuine ... which ABC exploits with the bit about the mom "up there helping orchestrate all this"? It's The Bachelorette!! Minus 7.

Kirk DeWindt's date is the most awkward, as it involves two eccentric families and one taxidermist. But Plus 3, because everyone's really nice. It is Wisconsin.

  • Kirk DeWindt Picture
  • Frank Neuschaefer Picture

At elimination time, you knew it was coming down to Kirk or Frank.

The women in Kirk's life are salt-of-the-earth folks who clearly love Ali. The only problem is Kirk himself. Nice as he is, there's just something missing. Minus 2.

"Sometimes love is a complicated thing." - Frank Neuschaefer. Deep. How can this man not be a writer when contemplative musings like this flow so easily? Plus 5.

Frank really needs a new look. Not only are his glasses too small for his face, is that a cardigan over a wife-beater? He's like Mr. Rogers meets The Situation. Minus 7.

On a similar note, the fancy dresses don't work on Ali Fedotowsky. She can totally pull off anything, but more baseball jerseys, fewer pink flowery gowns! Minus 4.

Plus 6 for the grainy, dream-like flashback footage during host-pimp Chris Harrison's fireside chat with Ali ... makes Roberto and Chris look even more dreamy, no?

Again, Frank. Is that a tux and a sweatshirt at the rose ceremony? Minus 3.

If The Bachelorette spoilers are to be believed, we know who's in the final two. If the promos for next week are to be believed, Ali may be paying a second visit to Kirk's father's basement ... to stuff Frank's corpse in that freezer. Plus 8.

TOTAL: +13. SEASON: +143.

Roses: Roberto, Chris, Frank. Out: Kirk.

Who should Ali Fedotowsky choose?

 

Tags: , , , ,
Avatar

I really like Frank, he was my favorite from the beginning!!!
Roberto is so hot!!!

Avatar

I am just upset that the bloggers and recap bloggers of the show are stating she didn't choose Kirk cuz of his dad's hobby and taxidermy as well as meat in the freezer and refer to him as Norman Bates. I was so incredibly offended. Hunting has been around before TV, Internet and pretty much everything. I hunt and can't believe that someone thinks because I hunt and keep my meat in the freezer from deer or rabbit or whatever I should be viewed as Norman Bates. On top of that we are opening a hunting outfitter so people can come on our land and hunt fowl and game and to think that society is trying to say we should be viewed as Norman Bates really gets me. I don't talk down or view Vegans poorly. My neighbor happens to be one and he comes over and grills his tofu with us. I am just really upset and would love to email these people and give them a piece of my mind.

Avatar

I guess that is what is great about America, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I think Ali has the strongest connection with Frank. Go back and watch the tapes. She is so in love with him. Maybe he doesn't look like you think he should look so you are hoping for Roberto, but, it ain't happening. Too bad it looks like Frank leaves the show next weekend, which, I bet is why Ali ends up choosing no one. Because Frank is going to break her heart. There's an opinion for ya. *wink* Get a clue.

Avatar

LOL i just got the headline, stuffed ... clever!

x Close Ad