Donald Trump to Rachel Uchitel: You're Fired!

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Rachel Uchitel just got fired Donald Trump before she was even hired.

The real estate mogul / reality star offered Tiger Woods' mistress a spot on the next season of Celebrity Apprentice, which she accepted verbally, sources say. 

Now that she's joining the cast of Celebrity Rehab instead, which we reported earlier today, Trump takes it back, questioning the professional adulterer's move.

"It's a terrible decision, he said. "We have zero interest in her now."

Rough, but the man does make a point: "Look at what Celebrity Apprentice did for Piers Morgan. He's getting Larry King's job. She made a bad mistake."

UCHITEL SHE BLEW IT: The Donald says The Mistress dropped the ball.

"Celebrity Apprentice is a huge show. Celebrity Rehab is not. I have 10 people who want to be on the show for every slot that's available. I'm moving on."

Celebrity Rehab sources say Rachel Uchitel originally turned it down, but producers doubled their offer and Dr. Drew personally visited her, so she agreed.

Uchitel will make around $500,000 for her stint on the show, or about 5 percent of what Tiger Woods allegedly paid her to never, ever talk about him.

Having an affair with Tiger is almost as lucrative as being Tiger.

A rep from VH1 claims Uchitel, who will be joined by Jeremy London, Janice Dickinson, Jason Wahler and Jason "Gummi Bear" Davis on the program, is hoping to kick an addiction to railing married celebrities prescription drugs.

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This chick is a piece of work... lost her fiancée in the 9/11 situation (google it) and then decides to go out and screw married men and claim she's fallen in love with each one. WOW. What exactly is going on in her head when she does this?? Besides the fact that she just LOOKS MUCH older than her actual age... and all the collagen she had pumped into her lips isn't helping, but the aging process has not been kind to her.


And is this new news to the world??? We know she is a freaking skank but thanks for pointing it out to anyone who has been living under a rock for the past 2 years. She is in the same catagory as "not so bomb-shell" Mcgee and the 20 thousand hoes of Tiger's.


Here are just a few likely addictions of this immoral, prostitute, Rachel UGLYTEL: 1-Kinky, anything goes sex with rich$$$$ married men.
2-Extorting money$$$$ from lovers for silence.
3-Silicone and Lipo.
4-Group, threesome sex.
5- Money/ Fame.